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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on September 7, 2006, at 11:25:15
I find my right fist tightly clenched. And my mind filled with thoughts that I'm just not going to make it. I just can't go on. And more specific images of how not to go on.
Then, as the day wears on, I shake the thoughts and feelings, and feel ok. More anxious than usual, but ok.
Then the next morning, I wake up thinking the same thoughts and with the same marks in my palm where my nails dug in.
I just can't figure out where the thoughts are coming from. I've labelled them as intrusive thoughts, and try to dismiss them. But when I first wake up, they don't feel like intrusive thoughts. They feel like my own thoughts that I believe.
Posted by Phillipa on September 7, 2006, at 11:40:55
In reply to Every morning when I wake up - Trigger?, posted by Dinah on September 7, 2006, at 11:25:15
Dinah it's no wonder with all the stuff that is going on in your life. Be kind to you. Love Phillipa
Posted by llrrrpp on September 7, 2006, at 14:21:02
In reply to Re: Every morning when I wake up - Trigger? » Dinah, posted by Phillipa on September 7, 2006, at 11:40:55
Dinah, I felt like this the last 2 weeks too.
I wake up in the middle of the night because my jaw is clenched so hard that my teeth hurt, or my elbow is so twisted that it hurts the next day.It's because of stuff going on in my life. With a little help from T and babblers (hmm? I wonder who?) I decided that I'm not going to apply for jobs right now. That has helped a lot. I've accepted that I'm going to finish the dissertation right now. And that's enough. When the time comes to apply for jobs, I'll do it. One thing at a time.
Last night I slept from 11:30 pm until 7:30 am. It's the most sleep I've had in weeks. Makes a big difference. And I woke up with my blankets still arranged, not wrapped in a rope around my ankle, wadded up by my pillow or some such nonsense.
I hope you can figure it out. In the meanwhile, take care of yourself, and cut your nails shorter.
(((((Dinah)))))
Posted by Dinah on September 7, 2006, at 16:18:26
In reply to Re: Every morning when I wake up - Trigger?, posted by llrrrpp on September 7, 2006, at 14:21:02
I suppose there must be something bothering me. But for the life of me I can't figure out what. Life seems more or less normal right now.
Posted by Deneb on September 7, 2006, at 19:45:30
In reply to Every morning when I wake up - Trigger?, posted by Dinah on September 7, 2006, at 11:25:15
Do you go to bed every night worrying about the day? Maybe you have bad dreams every night.
Maybe you can try to think positive thoughts in the morning until it becomes a habit.
I don't clench my fists, I clench my teeth when I sleep. I don't know how to solve this problem. It may be med related.
Deneb*
Posted by Jay on September 7, 2006, at 20:05:29
In reply to Every morning when I wake up - Trigger?, posted by Dinah on September 7, 2006, at 11:25:15
> I find my right fist tightly clenched. And my mind filled with thoughts that I'm just not going to make it. I just can't go on. And more specific images of how not to go on.
>
> Then, as the day wears on, I shake the thoughts and feelings, and feel ok. More anxious than usual, but ok.
>
> Then the next morning, I wake up thinking the same thoughts and with the same marks in my palm where my nails dug in.
>
> I just can't figure out where the thoughts are coming from. I've labelled them as intrusive thoughts, and try to dismiss them. But when I first wake up, they don't feel like intrusive thoughts. They feel like my own thoughts that I believe.
>
>Dinah...
Well, first I gotta ask about meds. (I know..this is not the meds board...but..) I think you mentioned you where on Risperdal? Well, I've been on it for over a year, and I find that I don't think it really has any effect anymore. And I am on 3mg's! I used to be zonked out and asleep just by 1mg.
Have you looked at the newer mood stabilizers? i.e. Lamictal, etc. Don't let this go on too long...you don't deserve it. There are some good meds that can help.
Take care,
Jay
Posted by annierose on September 7, 2006, at 20:07:53
In reply to Re: Every morning when I wake up, posted by Dinah on September 7, 2006, at 16:18:26
Maybe your brain remember where you were a year ago today --- living in a hotel room unsure of what the future held for you and your family. Can you remember any of your recent dreams? They may provide a clue.
Also, my daughter's p-doc told me that some medications taken at night can affect her dreams or morning wakefullness. I was just wondering if you changed any of your medications recently or changed when you took them.
Do you wake up feeling rested?
I hope this passes soon.
(((((((Dinah))))))))))))
Posted by Dinah on September 7, 2006, at 20:54:53
In reply to Re: Every morning when I wake up - » Dinah, posted by Jay on September 7, 2006, at 20:05:29
I've backed off the Risperdal to as needed. I was gaining too much weight to be good for my diabetes.
It occasionally occurs to me that I need to go back on a bit for the anxiety.
I'm on a smidge of Lamictal for migraines. I told Scott that I wouldn't mind trying a bit more, but I'm scared of my pdoc and my mind blanks out when I see him. I could try to ask him, but... Really I'm scared of him. He looks so severe.
I'd seek out a new pdoc, but I figure I'm lucky to have this one. The paper said the metro area went from 208 to 42 psychiatrists. And I figure other people need them more than I do. I even hate taking up this one's time.
Plus, he doesn't fuss about renewing my meds. I'd hate to end up with a benzophobic pdoc.
Posted by Dinah on September 7, 2006, at 20:56:55
In reply to Re: Every morning when I wake up - Trigger? » Dinah, posted by Deneb on September 7, 2006, at 19:45:30
This is really earlier in the morning than I can force order on my thoughts.
I'm not aware of any dreams in the night and mostly I go to bed perfectly peacefully, laughing at some sitcom or another.
Posted by Dinah on September 7, 2006, at 21:01:55
In reply to Re: Every morning when I wake up, posted by annierose on September 7, 2006, at 20:07:53
No really recent change.
I *never* wake up feeling rested. :) I've been doing less daytime sleeping than I did a few weeks ago.
Maybe my brain does remember things I consciously don't think about. My therapist says those moments as you fall asleep or as you wake up are the ones closest to our unconscious. He also says not to worry overmuch what thoughts you get at those times.
I guess I shouldn't worry about them. Just accept them as passing thoughts.
It's just that there's some itching restlessness inside me that says... Oh I don't know what it says, but it seems to be weighting the thoughts more than I'd like them weighted.
I think I just think too much. :)
This is the end of the thread.
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