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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 20 of 20. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 9:50:03
Okay, here is what I have accomplished this past week.
I feel the need to post this so that in a few more days when I have gone down hill again, I can read it and remind myself that there is an up side every once in a while.
# 1. I have managed to get up off my bum and get the house back in order and clean after three days of lying on the sofa and doing nothing.
#2. I deep cleaned my children's bathroom, and didn't murder my son for the condition of the floor around the toilet.
#3. I got up on a ladder, an extension ladder, and didn't fall, didn't sweat, and didn't have a panic attack. I plan to do it again today.
#4. I have come to the realization that if I am not willing to change my current domestic situation, then I am left to live with it. Shut up or get out.
#5. I have started seeing myself in the mirror and realizing that even though I am a 40 year old woman who has had three children and is carrying an extra 20 pounds, I am attractive. Actually in certain setting and certain light, I am pretty, even beautiful.
#6. I have read the Vibrator thread on Relationship Board in it's entirety, and I am intrigued, not embarassed. I do not think I am a pervert any more. I've learned way more about Susan, Tamar, and Fairywings than I ever thought I would, and I like that. I like hearing women share their stories of self satisfaction. It humanizes me.
#7. I have developed a feeling of love through friendship with my spouse. This may change the first time he whines, snivels, becomes disrespectful, etc. But for now, I can tolerate him, which goes a long way in my efforts to try to get along.
#8. I have come to the realization that I don't have to be romantically in love with someone to be at peace with myself. I have nothing to prove to anyone. I have made a pact with myself to try to lose weight, to work on my facial skin treatment diligently, and quit stressing over the fact that I can't get into those jeans in my closet. I will try to like myself.
#9. I have made a descision to be more supportive of others and less self centered. Through mutual support, friendships are forged, and helping is healing.
and finally,
#10. October is almost over, and I lived through it. I am not the only one who has suffered my losses, other share in my grief, and have their own to bear. There are people out there who love me for me, have never told me different, and have never expected me to conform to their rules of how a woman should act. I have three beautiful children who love me and a husband who adores me, thinks I am sexy and beautiful and I think I should start trying to like that.
Nuff Said
AdaGrace
Posted by ClearSkies on October 27, 2005, at 9:56:27
In reply to Update - A 10, posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 9:50:03
Dear AdaGrace,
I am going to try to come back and write my own 10 sometime today. In case I don't get a chance, I did want to say that
I love you and
I am immensely proud of you.
ClearSkies
Posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 9:57:44
In reply to Update - A 10, posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 9:50:03
#11. I said goodbye to who loves and feel okay about it and don't expect a reply. I'm going to be okay.
Posted by sal0805 on October 27, 2005, at 14:19:16
In reply to Re: Oh, and one more, posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 9:57:44
After a while, you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
and you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning and company doesn’t mean security.
And you learn that kisses aren’t contracts and presents aren’t promises,
and you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes open.
With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child.
And you begin to learn to build all your roads on today
because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans.
And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.
After a while you learn that even the sunshine burns if you get too much.
So you plant your own garden and decorate your soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure ………….
That you really are strong …………….
And you really do have worth!And you learn and you learn …………
With every goodbye – you learn.
Love you
Sabrina
Posted by TexasChic on October 27, 2005, at 17:13:04
In reply to Update - A 10, posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 9:50:03
Cool! I hope I can get to the level you're at someday. Quite impressive!
-T
Posted by 10derHeart on October 27, 2005, at 21:17:44
In reply to Update - A 10, posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 9:50:03
Wow!! Adagrace, this is so wonderful!
It took my breath away..no sh@t!
You are so strong, resilient and smart - you truly are.
Hang on tight to this list!! It can define you the more you dwell on it, you know?
awesome...just awesome
(10der..who rarely chimes in [not much useful to say] but faithfully reads Adagrace's threads :-) )
Posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 21:34:49
In reply to Re: Update - A 10 » AdaGrace, posted by ClearSkies on October 27, 2005, at 9:56:27
Thank you, right now I think I can make it. Who knows what 3 am will bring.
Who knows what tomorrow will bring, and I will probably cry and feel sorry for myself.
But right now, I think I'm okay.You are a special friend. I appreciate you so much.
Posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 21:41:11
In reply to Re: Oh, and one more » AdaGrace, posted by sal0805 on October 27, 2005, at 14:19:16
Your words are so perfect for this moment for me. And every one of them heartfelt and true. It means the world to me to have you as a friend.
Posted by Phillipa on October 27, 2005, at 21:43:55
In reply to Re: Sabrina, how beautiful » sal0805, posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 21:41:11
Wow have to go to relationships and find that Thread . Sounds very interesting to me. And you're doing awesome keep it up. Your self=esteem is high and that's where it should be. Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 21:44:11
In reply to Re: Update - A 10 » AdaGrace, posted by TexasChic on October 27, 2005, at 17:13:04
But I am not sure that I can live up to this feeling every day. I am very afraid that tomorrow I will wake up and feel horrible again. I don't know. I don't know that i have actually achieve a "level" or not.
Posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 21:46:32
In reply to Re: Update - A 10 » AdaGrace, posted by 10derHeart on October 27, 2005, at 21:17:44
Yes, that is what I need to do. It's hard though. Hard to think positively about your life, your self image, and your experiences. Very hard.
Posted by damos on October 27, 2005, at 23:04:35
In reply to Update - A 10, posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 9:50:03
Gracie,
You just amaze me in so many ways, day after day after day. What a great 10. It's just a joy ot know you.
Re #5: You're incredibly attractive, in any setting and any light you're all those things.
Posted by alesta on October 28, 2005, at 8:23:27
In reply to Update - A 10, posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 9:50:03
a lady told me today she thought i looked 21...:) (she freaked out when i told her how old i really was..that part felt kinda crappy..oops..this is a list of good things..sorry. and is 33 really that old? geez!) i guess all those days of applying sunscreen in the past finally paid off.
as of today i have enough time on my hands to post here again as much as i want (although am too tired to post with much umph..but y'all still love me right..right?:))
i found out yesterday that i might still be able to get a student loan, even though i still owe for a past loan, and might be able to go to school soon for web development!
um, and that's it for now.
-amy
Posted by AdaGrace on October 28, 2005, at 8:40:56
In reply to Re: Update - A 10 » AdaGrace, posted by damos on October 27, 2005, at 23:04:35
It's become a very great benefit for me to know you Damos. You built me up. I will do my best to try to stay there, and not tear myself down.
Posted by AdaGrace on October 28, 2005, at 8:44:27
In reply to Re: Update - A 10, posted by alesta on October 28, 2005, at 8:23:27
The age that you look is not as important as the age that you feel...in my opinion.
I am so proud of you for your acomplishments. You have struggled through some real life trama and I cannot immagine how rough that has been.
Take care Sweet One
Posted by alesta on October 28, 2005, at 9:05:22
In reply to Re: Update - A 10, posted by AdaGrace on October 28, 2005, at 8:44:27
> The age that you look is not as important as the age that you feel...in my opinion.
>
> I am so proud of you for your acomplishments. You have struggled through some real life trama and I cannot immagine how rough that has been.
>
>
> Take care Sweet One
>
aww thank you, adagrace! i am smiling after reading your post..you are so kind to me and i appreciate it so much!...it keeps me going.:) i might ponder those words of encouragement when i need em. sometimes i wonder why i'm still going..but i'm not quitting now. thanks for acknowledging my struggles. i'm so glad you think i'm sweet! that is so important to me.wishing you a peaceful, beautiful morning, filled preferably with sunshine and birds singing
:-)take care, dear,:)
amy
Posted by Monkeyoga on October 30, 2005, at 1:58:05
In reply to Re: Oh, and one more » AdaGrace, posted by sal0805 on October 27, 2005, at 14:19:16
Posted by Monkeyoga on October 30, 2005, at 1:00:59
In reply to Update - A 10, posted by AdaGrace on October 27, 2005, at 9:50:03
I stand in awe.
Posted by Damos on October 30, 2005, at 14:46:25
In reply to Re: Update - A 10 » damos, posted by AdaGrace on October 28, 2005, at 8:40:56
Anything that has happened you have done for yourself. I merely held the lantern and walked beside you as you found your way back to yourself. Then you allowed into the house of your mind to help you take down the distorted portraits that others had painted of you and rehang those that are truly you, and to clean all the mirrors so you can always see the beauty of your true self reflected.
Posted by muffled on October 31, 2005, at 14:58:06
In reply to Thanks, but.. » AdaGrace, posted by Damos on October 30, 2005, at 14:46:25
This is the end of the thread.
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