![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 11 of 11. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by utopizen on August 29, 2005, at 17:58:51
I am not a mean person by encouraging someone to consider thinking of the present and not living in the past, especially given I am extremely sensitive to how terrible it feels to be depressed.
If someone were to listen to me talk about how I thought Doctor X or Drug X caused my depression, I would not admire them for joining in to dwell on the subject with me. I'd like them to get my mind off it.
Given I embarassed myself a lot of times doing just this, I wish more people were more open about how it's not healthy to obsess over the pathology of any illness. I admire the few people with the courage not to throw me their shoulder to cry on, and told me to get on with my life.
It wasn't easy, and I didn't want to hear them anymore than anyone else dose, but that doesn't change the fact they're the only ones who truly helped me in the end.
Posted by SLS on August 29, 2005, at 17:58:51
In reply to Accutane., posted by utopizen on August 28, 2005, at 16:23:29
> I am not a mean person by encouraging someone to consider thinking of the present and not living in the past, especially given I am extremely sensitive to how terrible it feels to be depressed.
>
> If someone were to listen to me talk about how I thought Doctor X or Drug X caused my depression, I would not admire them for joining in to dwell on the subject with me. I'd like them to get my mind off it.
>
> Given I embarassed myself a lot of times doing just this, I wish more people were more open about how it's not healthy to obsess over the pathology of any illness. I admire the few people with the courage not to throw me their shoulder to cry on, and told me to get on with my life.
>
> It wasn't easy, and I didn't want to hear them anymore than anyone else dose, but that doesn't change the fact they're the only ones who truly helped me in the end.
I think it is sometimes important to be gentle on yourself and be merciful. I'm glad that you have been motivated to change your thinking in a way that you currently feel is healthy.To "get on with life" despite the presence of a debilitating illness often requires acceptance of that illness and the limitations it imposes. Depression is a very limiting disease. It is painful and unrelenting, and very difficult not to think about. I find that there is a certain amount of psychological mobility within the confines of depression, such that one can recognize that, although ill, they are not their illness. This allows for some positive energy to work with. Motivation and resources wax and wane with chronic severe depression, and it is unreasonable to assume that every day will be replete with identical levels of achievement. This is true of even the most healthy of individuals.
It is helpful to first identify what one needs from others. This is not always an easy thing to do. However, if one can be clear with themselves what they need, they can be clear with others what are their needs. In the absence of this clarity, all that others can offer is compassion, empathy, and a shoulder to cry on.
- Scott
Posted by willyee on August 29, 2005, at 17:58:51
In reply to Re: Accutane., posted by SLS on August 28, 2005, at 17:04:57
Great flipping post,sadly true but great!!!
I just wonder is there a time to stop thinking your gonna find that magic combination,and begin to have your *good days* out number your *bad ones* and actualy live somewhat of a normal life,
Or do you simply accept your limitations?
Posted by linkadge on August 29, 2005, at 17:58:51
In reply to Re: Accutane., posted by willyee on August 28, 2005, at 19:31:28
There are many parts of the brain. Some parts of the brain are designed to think about and reflect on all the wrongs, and the mistakes that have come to pass in ones life.
These parts of the brain are there for a purpose, these thoughts integrate with other thoughts to hopefully bring about a ballanced and proportioned approach to dealing with the future.
If we don't spend enough time reflecting. If we just sum up all our wrongs to "obsession" and just pop pill in hopes that our worst fears were just a chemical imballance, then we are bound to make the same mistakes time and time again.
A baby cries because it needs food. Unless that food is provided that signal cannot be quenched.
Getting on with the future will come in due time. There is no reason to inject the healing process with crack cocaine.
We must thank goodness for people who are attuned to the warning signs of danger.
Just my two cents.
Linkadge
Posted by ed_uk on August 29, 2005, at 17:58:51
In reply to Accutane., posted by utopizen on August 28, 2005, at 16:23:29
Hi John,
>If someone were to listen to me talk about how I thought Doctor X or Drug X caused my depression, I would not admire them for joining in to dwell on the subject with me. I'd like them to get my mind off it.
OK.... but it's important to be sensitive to people's feelings.
Regards
~Ed
Posted by utopizen on August 29, 2005, at 17:58:53
In reply to Re: Accutane. » utopizen, posted by ed_uk on August 29, 2005, at 3:15:28
> Hi John,
>
> >If someone were to listen to me talk about how I thought Doctor X or Drug X caused my depression, I would not admire them for joining in to dwell on the subject with me. I'd like them to get my mind off it.
>
> OK.... but it's important to be sensitive to people's feelings.
>
> Regards
>
> ~Ed
Point taken, although to be honest, I still don't know how I was so offensive. I didn't name call, and actually, I think the question was actually an important one to ask.I'm not sure how more tactful I could have posed it.
Please advise on a possible revision, ed?
I'd appreciate it.
Thanks. take care.
Posted by ed_uk on August 29, 2005, at 17:58:53
In reply to Re: Accutane., posted by utopizen on August 29, 2005, at 15:41:32
You said:
And is it going to save your life worrying about how your life is now "ruined"?
>I'm not sure how more tactful I could have posed it.
>Please advise on a possible revision, ed?Need I say any more?
~ed
Posted by Declan on August 29, 2005, at 18:31:15
In reply to Re: Accutane. » utopizen, posted by ed_uk on August 29, 2005, at 16:08:46
Don't you think that life sometimes demands that you obsess about how your life is ruined? Depression, mourning, grief can be like that. They're problematic states, but they are not easily dismissed.
Declan
Posted by Phil on August 29, 2005, at 18:32:30
In reply to Accutane., posted by utopizen on August 28, 2005, at 16:23:29
"I admire the few people with the courage not to throw me their shoulder to cry on, and told me to get on with my life."
I'd get on with my life without them in it.
Posted by Declan on August 29, 2005, at 19:29:51
In reply to Re: Accutane. » utopizen, posted by Phil on August 29, 2005, at 18:32:30
There are some regrettable thought forms around lately.
They've been here in Australia, although a rearguard action is being mounted more and more.
Pride of place goes to 'At the end of the day we must move on' with 'enhance' in close pursuit.
Declan
Posted by Gabbix2 on August 29, 2005, at 21:19:50
In reply to Re: Accutane. » utopizen, posted by Phil on August 29, 2005, at 18:32:30
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.