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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 14 of 14. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by dreamer on November 19, 2001, at 22:42:12
I can't take much more it's as if I get to see and smell the cake only to have it snatched away.
What! is someone up there having a joke I really don't wanna get manic but......
Anger not inwards -outwards -manic.
Something good has to happen something to look forward to have faith in I think I'm a good person why oh why with a positive outlook I get crap, things get cruel so much love inside -life is breaking my heart.dreamer hoping but not coping......rambling
Posted by sar on November 20, 2001, at 0:36:35
In reply to Fate.. bad luck ...give me a break........, posted by dreamer on November 19, 2001, at 22:42:12
my dear dreamer,
what is your life like? what is your current situation?
i smell salt&vinegar potato chips only to have them snatched away....
if it means anything to you, i enjoy your posts, i think you're a riot and quite a talented writer...
ther's not much more i can say, except i hope you can make it through this, and i have good faith that you will.
your fellow piscean,
sar
Posted by Krazy Kat on November 20, 2001, at 9:41:40
In reply to Fate.. bad luck ...give me a break........, posted by dreamer on November 19, 2001, at 22:42:12
dreamer:
anger outside = manic. perfect!
i feel as if i love you, dear dreamer. what solace is an internet connection? i don't know. but the friendships i'm forging here seem more real than those in the "real" world right now.
what to look forward each day? it's difficult, i know. i'm trying desperately to recapture the feelings from childhood, the things that made me 'happy' then. your cats? your art? a cup of coffee in the morning?
have you ever tried yoga? when i get myself to do it, i feel more at peace (just at home with a little $1.00 beginners book).
- K.
Posted by Krazy Kat on November 20, 2001, at 9:42:37
In reply to Re: Fate.. bad luck ...give me a break........ » dreamer, posted by sar on November 20, 2001, at 0:36:35
Posted by kid_A on November 20, 2001, at 14:05:22
In reply to I Love salt vinegar potato chips (nm) » sar, posted by Krazy Kat on November 20, 2001, at 9:42:37
Posted by Greg A. on November 20, 2001, at 16:44:37
In reply to Fate.. bad luck ...give me a break........, posted by dreamer on November 19, 2001, at 22:42:12
My o my! What a timely post dreamer. Whose sick joke is this anyways? I have gone through a number of months where normal seemed within reach for me. And even tho I have felt a downward trend for a month or so, I would have a few good days to make me think I am back on track.
I want so very much to be well. Not just for me, although that selfish side is a big part of it, but also so I can treat friends and family as I want to treat them. Not just feel like a shell going through the motions of my life. I’m sorry but ‘mood swings’ just does not begin to describe it.
My positive outlook seems very fragile; confined to the days or weeks when I feel good. The moment there is a reversal I feel as if I am doomed to live in this bystander to life space forever. Today is pure crap for me. I dragged myself out of bed with half an hour to spare before work. I hurt everywhere. I put on whatever clothes were lying around. I ate 2 pieces of toast because one should eat in the morning. I took some of my meds. I hate the sight of them when they do not seem to be working. I drove my daughters to school. I am at work and all I am thinking about is leaving – but to go where or do what? And I add up the score sheet. I feel I am doing all I can on my side. What does it take to get a break??
BTW – congrats and wishes for the best to Kat. You have made a very important first step in getting your relationship on track. How did hubby feel about the counseling session? My wife and I tried counseling. It helped, as you said, to get us both to open up on issues which we were either avoiding or just did not seem to have the time to explore. What we failed to do was to make a commitment to change anything.
Funny – I just had a pdoc appointment last Friday and said things were fine. I guess I was also hoping – hoping that if I said it and stuck with it, it would be true. But it’s not.
I wish I could say or do something dreamer, to make it better – to stop life from breaking your heart. But all I can say right now is you’re not alone.Greg
Posted by dreamer on November 20, 2001, at 19:16:52
In reply to Re: Fate.. bad luck ...give me a break........ » dreamer, posted by sar on November 20, 2001, at 0:36:35
> my dear dreamer,
>
> what is your life like? what is your current situation?
>
> i smell salt&vinegar potato chips only to have them snatched away....
>
> if it means anything to you, i enjoy your posts, i think you're a riot and quite a talented writer...
>
> ther's not much more i can say, except i hope you can make it through this, and i have good faith that you will.
>
> your fellow piscean,> Hi sar
oh life ......stale.... trying to change it maybe it's age thing or maybe I've woken up from my cozy meds.dunno.
So much energy but no outlet need to go a little crazy then .......sleep wow am i sleeping.
Depressive times can't do anything productive if I could use these times for something.
Still hope.things have gotta get better....for all of us!dreamer still evolving.
Posted by dreamer on November 20, 2001, at 19:36:29
In reply to Re: Fate.. bad luck ...give me a break........ » dreamer, posted by Krazy Kat on November 20, 2001, at 9:41:40
> dreamer:
>
> anger outside = manic. perfect!
>
> i feel as if i love you, dear dreamer. what solace is an internet connection? i don't know. but the friendships i'm forging here seem more real than those in the "real" world right now.
>
> what to look forward each day? it's difficult, i know. i'm trying desperately to recapture the feelings from childhood, the things that made me 'happy' then. your cats? your art? a cup of coffee in the morning?
>
> have you ever tried yoga? when i get myself to do it, i feel more at peace (just at home with a little $1.00 beginners book).
>
> - K.Funny you mention childhood- tommorow I'm meeting a fellow bipolar and were going to the park to play like children be silly and I'm taking kiddy sweeties and going to the toy shop.
Have tried yoga I try /force myself to exercise each day even just for 5 minutes I have yoga /stretching simple excercise book .
your right about real world-friendships here I feel less lonely.
Hey I love you too!, I've plenty of love just can't seem to express/give it to anyone seems as if people have gone cold, lost the passion.dreamer romantic.
Posted by dreamer on November 20, 2001, at 19:56:46
In reply to Re: Fate.. bad luck ...give me a break........, posted by Greg A. on November 20, 2001, at 16:44:37
> My o my! What a timely post dreamer. Whose sick joke is this anyways? I have gone through a number of months where normal seemed within reach for me. And even tho I have felt a downward trend for a month or so, I would have a few good days to make me think I am back on track.
> I want so very much to be well. Not just for me, although that selfish side is a big part of it, but also so I can treat friends and family as I want to treat them. Not just feel like a shell going through the motions of my life. I’m sorry but ‘mood swings’ just does not begin to describe it.
> My positive outlook seems very fragile; confined to the days or weeks when I feel good. The moment there is a reversal I feel as if I am doomed to live in this bystander to life space forever. Today is pure crap for me. I dragged myself out of bed with half an hour to spare before work. I hurt everywhere. I put on whatever clothes were lying around. I ate 2 pieces of toast because one should eat in the morning. I took some of my meds. I hate the sight of them when they do not seem to be working. I drove my daughters to school. I am at work and all I am thinking about is leaving – but to go where or do what? And I add up the score sheet. I feel I am doing all I can on my side. What does it take to get a break??
> BTW – congrats and wishes for the best to Kat. You have made a very important first step in getting your relationship on track. How did hubby feel about the counseling session? My wife and I tried counseling. It helped, as you said, to get us both to open up on issues which we were either avoiding or just did not seem to have the time to explore. What we failed to do was to make a commitment to change anything.
> Funny – I just had a pdoc appointment last Friday and said things were fine. I guess I was also hoping – hoping that if I said it and stuck with it, it would be true. But it’s not.
> I wish I could say or do something dreamer, to make it better – to stop life from breaking your heart. But all I can say right now is you’re not alone.
>
>Hi Greg,What to do?
Sometimes think it's best to try and live in the NOW then I get nurses and people saying plan for the future what are you going to do..etc so then I worry, panic more like.
Then like you said -work a job that drains and leaves no time for a healthy life.
Finding a job that inspires/enjoy -a fairytale.
Things sometimes gel and you feel good optimistic does seem as if it's a sick joke.
I usually try and get myself amongst nature early morning when everyones asleep even a spooky cemetary is calming or sit in the garden watching the foxes scanning the sky-even doing this is difficult I always make excuses well the negetive me two poles in conflict.
Even music is painful whilst ill can't read watch tv -anything just want to escape but where?Oh well this helps-hope I ain't made you miserable
take care.dreamer in a vacuum
Posted by dreamer on November 20, 2001, at 19:58:31
In reply to Re: I Love salt vinegar potato chips EWWWWWWWWW (nm), posted by kid_A on November 20, 2001, at 14:05:22
Posted by Krazy Kat on November 20, 2001, at 21:43:52
In reply to Re: Fate.. bad luck ...give me a break........ » Greg A., posted by dreamer on November 20, 2001, at 19:56:46
I vacuumed my upstairs tonight - downstairs is hardwood. I did not enjoy it, though I did enjoy vaccuming as a child. Vroom, vroom, and then all is clean. It's just not that simple any more. ;)
Love you,
- KK
Posted by Greg A. on November 20, 2001, at 23:48:47
In reply to dreamer in a vacuum... , posted by Krazy Kat on November 20, 2001, at 21:43:52
Hope this is not too much for you guys ... but I like vacuuming.
Greg
Posted by Gracie2 on November 26, 2001, at 23:23:38
In reply to Fate.. bad luck ...give me a break........, posted by dreamer on November 19, 2001, at 22:42:12
My 20-year-old son is terrified of yellow Bic lighters. He's convinced that they're terribly bad luck.My luck has been pretty rotten lately and I'm studying Feng Shui. I'll let you know if it works.
-Gracie
Posted by Katey on November 27, 2001, at 9:18:10
In reply to Re: Fate.. bad luck ...give me a break........, posted by Gracie2 on November 26, 2001, at 23:23:38
i use feng shui to irritate my mother everytime she rearranges the furniture. the aura in the living room is so bad right now im about to go rearrange it myself, atleast when she kills me, i'll die in a room with good aura :)
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