Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 810850

Shown: posts 1 to 22 of 22. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Need suggestions

Posted by Maxime on February 5, 2008, at 12:14:54

I am in a strange situation. I am see the therapist at the hospital, but only for five more sessions. I have to find my own therapist and the one at the hospital is going to help me with the transition.

Today he asked me what were we going to do for the next five sessions. I don't have a clue. I don't know what he can help me with in such a short time.

Are there any exercises or something that we can do to make the most out the time. Otherwise I feel like am wasting his time. I feel I need to see him because he is supportive. But I need to present ideas to him next week.

Ideas anyone? I know you guys are smart!

Maxime

 

Re: Need suggestions Maxime

Posted by sunnydays on February 5, 2008, at 14:42:38

In reply to Need suggestions, posted by Maxime on February 5, 2008, at 12:14:54

Finding/practicing coping mechanisms to deal with SI? I know that you have asked about that here recently. I don't know you well enough to know other big issues going on in your life, but those are places to look at. Some of the DBT exercises on distress tolerance are really really useful if you haven't seen them already. They are online if you Google.

sunnydays

 

Re: Need suggestions sunnydays

Posted by Maxime on February 5, 2008, at 16:22:49

In reply to Re: Need suggestions Maxime, posted by sunnydays on February 5, 2008, at 14:42:38

We talked about that today. I just find it hard to get into something when I know that I am going to see him for 5 more weeks. Yet I feel like I need him. He is constant and I can depend on him.

Thanks for your suggestions!

Maxime

 

Re: Need suggestions

Posted by Justherself54 on February 5, 2008, at 20:23:51

In reply to Re: Need suggestions sunnydays, posted by Maxime on February 5, 2008, at 16:22:49

>
>
> We talked about that today. I just find it hard to get into something when I know that I am going to see him for 5 more weeks. Yet I feel like I need him. He is constant and I can depend on him.
>
> Thanks for your suggestions!

Is there any way you can continue to see him..It seems like you have established a connection to him and feel safe..ask him..maybe he can arrange something..
>
> Maxime

 

Re: Need suggestions Justherself54

Posted by Maxime on February 5, 2008, at 21:04:13

In reply to Re: Need suggestions, posted by Justherself54 on February 5, 2008, at 20:23:51

No, I can't see him. He works for the hospital and cannot see me long term. I hope I find someone like him. :)

Maxime

 

Re: Need suggestions Maxime

Posted by RealMe on February 5, 2008, at 23:11:48

In reply to Need suggestions, posted by Maxime on February 5, 2008, at 12:14:54

Gosh Maxime

You and I seem to be in a similar boat. I think it best to see who else does the type of therapy your current T does, and then see if there is someone nearby who does similar therapy. That is what I am going to do.

RealMe

 

Re: Need suggestions RealMe

Posted by Dinah on February 6, 2008, at 0:07:00

In reply to Re: Need suggestions Maxime, posted by RealMe on February 5, 2008, at 23:11:48

You've lost your therapist? I'm sorry, but I'm behind on what's going on with you, I think.

Will your therapist, and Maxime's therapist, help you find someone else? My therapist had a fill-in chosen for me if I needed one, someone with a similar style to his own.

 

Re: Need suggestions Dinah

Posted by RealMe on February 6, 2008, at 0:18:10

In reply to Re: Need suggestions RealMe, posted by Dinah on February 6, 2008, at 0:07:00

Thanks Dinah; I have not lost my therapist yet but will by the end of the month. I just cannot afford $245 per session even with insurance to pay 40% or 45%. I was going x2 per week,and he wanted me to come x3 per week, and I agreed. I looked at our finances though, and today I said I can't do three times per week. Now I know from lookingat my finances that I can't do x2 per week either without exhausting my savings and my husbands so that retirement is in the poor house. He indicated once per week he did not think would be helpful and said he would see who he knew who was less, but he did not think he knew any senior analysts who would be less expensive. I feel so weary. I may have to search on my own.

RealMe

 

Re: Need suggestions RealMe

Posted by Dinah on February 6, 2008, at 0:21:52

In reply to Re: Need suggestions Dinah, posted by RealMe on February 6, 2008, at 0:18:10

That really s*cks. I remember that you really felt you were doing well with this one. :(

That *is* a lot per session. I worry about my own finances with paying much less per session.

 

Re: Need suggestions Dinah

Posted by RealMe on February 6, 2008, at 1:47:26

In reply to Re: Need suggestions RealMe, posted by Dinah on February 6, 2008, at 0:21:52

I have liked working with him, but I think the money thing is interfering with me being able to make any progress. I am also feeling really angry about the whole think. Maybe he will do once per week. I will see on Friday. We already canceled tomorrow. I saw him today, and I will see him on Friday. The x3 per week was going to be Tues, Wed, and Friday. I kind of feel like I have a knife stabbing through my heart. It does hurt a lot.

RealMe

 

RealMe and Maxime

Posted by JoniS on February 6, 2008, at 6:57:37

In reply to Need suggestions, posted by Maxime on February 5, 2008, at 12:14:54

Hey You Guys

I am very sorry to hear that you are losing your T's. I know we are all different, but for me the process has been nearly devastating. I have been grieving the loss of that relationship for about 7 weeks now. Although my T is on sabbatical and scheduled to return in April, I don't think I will resume therapy with him. I just don't want to go through this grieving all over again.

One recommendation I can make is to use the time you have left to talk about your feelings for your T, what all has helped you, how you've changed, where you have gotten your strength from, and how you think you will handle the separation/end. I wish I had done more of that.

Good Luck

Joni

 

Re: RealMe and Maxime JoniS

Posted by RealMe on February 6, 2008, at 7:52:42

In reply to RealMe and Maxime, posted by JoniS on February 6, 2008, at 6:57:37

Thanks Joni

This is what I plan to do.

I have not been here much lately, but I remember you talking about your T leaving. I am happy this person is coming back. I would have mixed feelings seeing a T gone for so long. I mean I would be so happy to see him or her, but I would also be upset that I had been left and scared it would happen again.

I will be okay and may just take a break from this all (therapy). I will see what my current T has to say. Yes, I like him a lot, but the fee is prohibitive for what he wants me to do.

RealMe

 

Re: Need suggestions/Maxime

Posted by Justherself54 on February 6, 2008, at 9:09:36

In reply to Re: Need suggestions Justherself54, posted by Maxime on February 5, 2008, at 21:04:13

> No, I can't see him. He works for the hospital and cannot see me long term. I hope I find someone like him. :)
>
> Maxime

This might be a shot in the dark too..perhaps he could refer you to a colleague outside the hospital..at least you'd know it was someone he felt would be a good fit..sorry..just raking my brain!

 

REALLY need suggestions

Posted by Maxime on February 6, 2008, at 10:55:41

In reply to Re: Need suggestions/Maxime, posted by Justherself54 on February 6, 2008, at 9:09:36

Right now I am more concerned about what we will do for the next 5 sessions. He asked me what we should do (discuss, work on) and I have NO IDEA.

I only started seeing him in November so it is not like I have been with him forever.

Yes, I am disappointed that I won't be able to see him anymore, but maybe I will find someone who is even better. That is what I am hoping. I don't think I could handle a bad T experience right now because I am too fragile right now. I hate that word: fragile. But it fits for now.

Maxime

 

Re: REALLY need suggestions Maxime

Posted by Phillipa on February 6, 2008, at 12:34:08

In reply to REALLY need suggestions, posted by Maxime on February 6, 2008, at 10:55:41

Maxime late on the thread but it would be great if your current T could refer you to someone he knows and fill him in also. Is it an option? Phillipa

 

Re: REALLY need suggestions

Posted by raisinb on February 6, 2008, at 14:17:51

In reply to REALLY need suggestions, posted by Maxime on February 6, 2008, at 10:55:41

I'm sorry both of you are having to go through this. It sounds tough.

RealMe--your T won't adjust his fee for you? I know that's a delicate subject to bring up.

Maxime--Is there any way you could talk about how you're having trouble knowing what to talk about, since you only have 5 sessions left? Can you ask him to help you brainstorm how you'll handle looking for a new T, whether you want to do that right away, what he thinks would be good for you? Just some suggestions.

I am seldom able to talk freely in therapy and we spend countless sessions talking about how I can't and why. You'd be suprised how fruitful it can be :)

 

Re: REALLY need suggestions raisinb

Posted by Maxime on February 6, 2008, at 17:54:04

In reply to Re: REALLY need suggestions, posted by raisinb on February 6, 2008, at 14:17:51

> Maxime--Is there any way you could talk about how you're having trouble knowing what to talk about, since you only have 5 sessions left? Can you ask him to help you brainstorm how you'll handle looking for a new T, whether you want to do that right away, what he thinks would be good for you? Just some suggestions.
>
> I am seldom able to talk freely in therapy and we spend countless sessions talking about how I can't and why. You'd be suprised how fruitful it can be :)

Thank you, that's a good suggestion. I think I am scared that he won't see me anymore unless I have something concrete we can work on. So instead of thinking about my issues all I can think about is "I don't want to lose him before 5 sessions".

Maxime

 

Re: REALLY need suggestions

Posted by rskontos on February 6, 2008, at 22:48:47

In reply to Re: REALLY need suggestions raisinb, posted by Maxime on February 6, 2008, at 17:54:04

Maxime, go in a tell him just that. What is the biggest thing you think is causing your depression. Maybe we can help you narrow it down before you see him. First of all, he knows you went in to the hospital so you were in crisis. He knows you are in a deep depression. Sometimes we don't know why we are in a deep depression. Tell him you are frightened about finding a new T, and him dropping you before you find a new one. That should open the door to a discussion. rsk

 

Re: REALLY need suggestions

Posted by rskontos on February 6, 2008, at 22:48:51

In reply to Re: REALLY need suggestions raisinb, posted by Maxime on February 6, 2008, at 17:54:04

Maxime, go in a tell him just that. What is the biggest thing you think is causing your depression. Maybe we can help you narrow it down before you see him. First of all, he knows you went in to the hospital so you were in crisis. He knows you are in a deep depression. Sometimes we don't know why we are in a deep depression. Tell him you are frightened about finding a new T, and him dropping you before you find a new one. That should open the door to a discussion. rsk

 

Re: REALLY need suggestions rskontos

Posted by Maxime on February 6, 2008, at 23:08:33

In reply to Re: REALLY need suggestions, posted by rskontos on February 6, 2008, at 22:48:47

According to my T, borderline personality disorder is what is causing the depression. I can see it in some ways, but I don't think it is the only cause.

Thanks for the suggestion. :)

Maxime


>

 

Re: REALLY need suggestions Maxime

Posted by Phillipa on February 6, 2008, at 23:12:40

In reply to Re: REALLY need suggestions rskontos, posted by Maxime on February 6, 2008, at 23:08:33

Maxime don't understand that as borderline personality would be an axis II I think the personality type and why a person might act out. Depression is Axis I. Personality could cause how you react to depression but can it be the cause of it? Love Phillipa

 

Re: REALLY need suggestions Phillipa

Posted by Maxime on February 7, 2008, at 11:07:27

In reply to Re: REALLY need suggestions Maxime, posted by Phillipa on February 6, 2008, at 23:12:40

Good point Phillipa. I don't get it either. But this therapist is really into his personality disorders. I guess if I feel "rejected" or "abandoned" or "Self injure" which are all borderline then dealing with those things could bring on a depression. Who know what came first. I think it was the depression.

Maxime


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