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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 21 of 21. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by happyflower on December 3, 2005, at 14:26:21
My T sits in chair across from me with crossed legs. Sometimes he is leaning back. Very relaxed looking. Feet pointing in my direction. Nice socks! LOL
Posted by Dinah on December 3, 2005, at 14:37:23
Legs spread wide apart.
Close, but not too close.
Sometimes it's a bit of a problem, actually, when my eyes aren't closed. My eyes will be open, but I'll be focused inward, and when I realize where I'm looking it's a bit awkward feeling, tho he never seems to notice. He probably thinks my eyes are closed all the time. Not that there's anything to see or anything. It's just not an area that's usually quite so easy to look at accidentally, you know?
Posted by ghost on December 3, 2005, at 16:02:44
In reply to How does your T sit and where?, posted by happyflower on December 3, 2005, at 14:26:21
my T sits in an old ragged looking living room chair that seems to swallow her up. she's about my size so she doesnt cross her legs (us fat girls can't do that, heheh). the chair is directly in front of one side of an old loveseat, so i sit on the side that's not direclty in front of her so i can stare anywherebutather when i dont want to talk or want to pretend i'm "thinking." i never really thought much about it before.
Posted by allisonross on December 3, 2005, at 16:24:54
In reply to How does your T sit and where?, posted by happyflower on December 3, 2005, at 14:26:21
> My T sits in chair across from me with crossed legs. Sometimes he is leaning back. Very relaxed looking. Feet pointing in my direction. Nice socks! LOL
My T sits in a chair on rollers...and rolls right over in front of me. Sometimes he leans back with feet up on a chair, and takes shoes off (nice socks, LOL!!)
Actually, I have a shoe fetish, and I LOVE his shoes; they are the kind with tassels; I have a pair myself!
I've read books on body language; watch out if they spread their legs (while sitting of course), or let their shoe dangle off of their foot.
My T has done both, LOL, LOL---we discussed the body language thing; it is unbelievably fascinating.
I've let my high heel dangle from my foot many times, LOL
Did you know that if someone's eyes dilate, that it means they like what they are looking at? I took a flashlight once, and shined it into my t's eyes just for fun! Hey, I know all the tricks, LOL!
Do you know the significance of lipstick (just learned this one)
Posted by Dinah on December 3, 2005, at 16:30:09
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where?( body language) » happyflower, posted by allisonross on December 3, 2005, at 16:24:54
What is it supposed to mean if they spread their legs? I think in my therapist, it just means he's awfully tall - taller than most chairs are made for.
Posted by happyflower on December 3, 2005, at 16:50:52
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where?( body language) » allisonross, posted by Dinah on December 3, 2005, at 16:30:09
> What is it supposed to mean if they spread their legs? I think in my therapist, it just means he's awfully tall - taller than most chairs are made for.
Dianh, I would tell you what it means when guys sits with there legs wide open, but I am not sure you want to know since your T sits that way.
My T is also tall 6'2" and he sits with his legs crossed on a chair with rollers.
Posted by Dinah on December 3, 2005, at 16:59:45
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where?( body language) » Dinah, posted by happyflower on December 3, 2005, at 16:50:52
I wouldn't actually believe that it meant anything bad about my therapist. I'm just curious as to what it's supposed to mean.
He's very relaxed in his body language and actions around me. He puts in eye drops, picks at things (don't ask), etc. etc.
He's taller than that. I can't recall exactly. 6'5" maybe? Daddy was 6'2" or 6'3" and he's noticeably taller than that. His legs always *look* too long for his chair. :)
Posted by daisym on December 3, 2005, at 19:27:31
In reply to How does your T sit and where?, posted by happyflower on December 3, 2005, at 14:26:21
He has a chair with wheels in both his offices which face the couch. He can swivel towards me depending on which end of the couch I choose to sit on that day. He sort leans towards one side with his legs crossed and then will shift to the other side. He never rolls close to me, though he will lean forward sometimes. And he never, ever takes off his shoes. Only *I* do that!
I've noticed that he holds his hands sort of open on his lap -- not clenched, not fisted and not crossed. I've wondered if he consciously does that or if he makes a point to look so open.
Posted by Dinah on December 3, 2005, at 19:59:50
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where?( body language) » happyflower, posted by Dinah on December 3, 2005, at 16:59:45
Come to think of it, he probably adopts that posture consciously. To convey openness and relaxation. Maybe especially because he's large. Leaning back and stretching out his legs makes him seem both open and nonthreatening.
Now that I recall, he rather deliberately gets in that position after he's been angry or defensive. Maybe it helps *him* be open and relaxed as well.
I sit in the classic closed position. Arms crossed tightly under my breasts, legs crossed. And my eyes are closed and my head tilted to the side.
Posted by Poet on December 3, 2005, at 20:05:11
In reply to How does your T sit and where?, posted by happyflower on December 3, 2005, at 14:26:21
In a chair across from me (on loveseat) with her feet planted firmly on the ground and her hands palms up in her lap.
She's too chubby to cross her legs, but she could cross her ankles. Never does, those feet are always flat on the floor.
Poet
Posted by Dinah on December 3, 2005, at 20:13:52
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where?, posted by daisym on December 3, 2005, at 19:27:31
My blasted memory. When you said that I had a flash of memory that my therapist *did* take off his new and uncomfortable shoes once. And that I was quite scandalized.
But now the memory is gone, and I'm not sure that it ever really happened.
Posted by gardenergirl on December 3, 2005, at 23:01:32
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where? » daisym, posted by Dinah on December 3, 2005, at 20:13:52
He sits across from me in a chair. I sit on a couch, on the right side. It's funny, but for a time, I kept heading for the left end of the couch when I came in. I finally told him that I was doing that, and I didn't know why. He said it was to be further away from him. I don't remember what was going on in therapy at the time. But it kept startling me when I would go to sit down, and I realized I was headed in the "wrong direction."
Sometimes he leans on one arm of the chair with his chin resting in his hand. Always crosses his legs, and occasionally shifts. I've noticed it's often the same time as I do that. I always wonder if he's mirroring me or if I'm mirroring him. :)
He sometimes wiggles his foot a bit, kind of rotating his ankle. I tend to look to his right, under the table next to him. It's a nice blank spot, which helps me free associate more.
gg
Posted by allisonross on December 4, 2005, at 6:53:04
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where?( body language) » allisonross, posted by Dinah on December 3, 2005, at 16:30:09
> What is it supposed to mean if they spread their legs? I think in my therapist, it just means he's awfully tall - taller than most chairs are made for.
The book says that sitting that way exposes their crotch area; in other words: look at this
It also could mean that's just the way they are sitting (LOL); we all do things subconsciously; so there's no way to know for sure.
It also says that if they sit with their feet pointed towards you, that they are engaged-interested in what you have to say.
Ally
Posted by happyflower on December 4, 2005, at 7:31:25
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where?( body language) » Dinah, posted by allisonross on December 4, 2005, at 6:53:04
>>
> The book says that sitting that way exposes their crotch area; in other words: look at thisI have also read it means that they are open to you sexually. But my DH would probably say that their "boys" need more room! LOL
> It also could mean that's just the way they are sitting (LOL); we all do things subconsciously; so there's no way to know for sure.
>
> It also says that if they sit with their feet pointed towards you, that they are engaged-interested in what you have to say.
>
My T's feet are almost always pointing torward me. I hear if they lean torwards you it also shows they are interested in what you are saying. So Ally gurl, what does it mean if they wink at you or blush after you smile at them? LOL
Posted by muffled on December 4, 2005, at 11:46:31
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where?( body language) » allisonross, posted by happyflower on December 4, 2005, at 7:31:25
I, when I'm a particular way, slouch and splay my legs, but my T doesn't interest me sexually (yuk, definately not!) but she's nice and all. I think its more like I'm saying I'm not afraid.
My T moves around. Sometimes she moves from one chair to another, sometimes she shifts her chair. Don't look at her much, so not quite sure how she sits.
Posted by Tamar on December 4, 2005, at 17:54:30
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where?( body language) » happyflower, posted by Dinah on December 3, 2005, at 16:59:45
> He's taller than that. I can't recall exactly. 6'5" maybe? Daddy was 6'2" or 6'3" and he's noticeably taller than that. His legs always *look* too long for his chair. :)
I’ve also read that if a man’s legs are wide apart it’s a courting gesture. On the other hand, my husband is also extremely tall (maybe an inch or two taller than your therapist) and he usually sits with his legs apart. I think it’s because most chairs are too low for men with such long legs. If their feet are going to rest comfortably on the floor without their knees touching their chins, their legs have to be apart. That’s my theory anyway!
My therapist used to cross and uncross his legs a lot. Once I noticed he was sitting with his knees crossed and his hands sort of squeezed between his thighs. I wasn’t sure what it meant, but it looked like some kind of self-protection gesture! I don’t think we were talking about anything particularly threatening, though.
I often used to sit on my hands in therapy. I think it was a way of trying to make sure I was in complete control of what I said…
Body language fascinates me!
Posted by allisonross on December 4, 2005, at 22:22:35
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where?( body language) » allisonross, posted by happyflower on December 4, 2005, at 7:31:25
It means they are FLIRTING with you, Happy gurl!! LOL
I tell ya, I could write a book on all the flirting stuff my t has done......SAID and done. It would probably be a best-seller.
Hugs n grins, Ally-girl
Posted by LittleGirlLost on December 5, 2005, at 14:19:50
In reply to How does your T sit and where?, posted by happyflower on December 3, 2005, at 14:26:21
She sits in a chair identical to mine, directly in front of me (a few feet away). I think she usually crosses her legs. Sometimes her arms are openly resting on the arms of the chair, and sometimes she rests her elbows on the arms and folds/clasps her hands in front of her.
Next thread should be how do YOU sit? (I can talk a lot about that because sometimes I wish the seating was different or that "I" sat differently.)
lgl
Posted by muffled on December 5, 2005, at 14:28:21
In reply to Re: How does your T sit and where?, posted by LittleGirlLost on December 5, 2005, at 14:19:50
we watching YOU even as you watch US.
HA!!!!!!!!
Posted by happyflower on December 5, 2005, at 14:31:43
In reply to YO.T's of the world......, posted by muffled on December 5, 2005, at 14:28:21
Posted by Anneke on December 7, 2005, at 14:53:21
In reply to How does your T sit and where?, posted by happyflower on December 3, 2005, at 14:26:21
My therapist sits on a chair across from me...usually with her legs crossed and hands resting on the arms of the chair. She has occassionally sat next to me on the couch (always asking if it's OK with me) to look at pictures with me and once to comfort me when I was really upset. Interesting thread!
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