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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Angela2 on September 5, 2005, at 15:59:52
My last therapy session was last Friday. I don't mean I'm terminating therapy, I just mean that the last time I had therapy was on Friday. It seemed to go pretty well. We talked a lot about my meds and the pros and cons of staying on/ going off them. Then we talked about my job and how I've been emotional there. I don't have much to say about that part. Except, I've been more emotional at work lately and I'm worried about being the office crazy person ebcause I've cried a few times there.
Then we got onto the topic of impulsivity and the fact that I excessively talk to certain people about my problems (my brother and my academic advisor) when I think maybe I shouldn't be talking *so much* about myself and how I think maybe it could be ruining my relationships. We talked about forming good relationships so that I can get good references for jobs. There's really nothing I can do about the crying episodes now, but I was told by my boss that I'm doing a good job and he has no complaints about me. I don't know why I can't just believe that.
I never actually talked to my t about how I feel like she doesn't touch base on a few things. It just didn't seem important when I went into therpay that day. Other things had been going on that needed to be tended to.
One thing I am trying to do right now is distance myself from my therapist. There was a time in my life not so long ago, when she was my world, and I didn't really think outside the box of therapy, and I don't want that to happen again. A consequence of this was that when I got a boyfrined and started hanging out with his friends, I wasn't well equipped socially and it seemed like I was going to therapy a lot more often during some of the hard times I had with my boyfriend and his friends. I think I should just be able to handle and cope on my own. She isn't God or anything close to it, and I want to stop putting her on a pedestal. It seems like when things get hard I think of going to her. I would like to just cope on my own to save money and I would like to stop thinking of her as my world just as I don't want just art to be my world or just TV. It may be comfortable to live like that, but when adversity hits, I end up not knowing what to do.
Posted by rainbowbrite on September 5, 2005, at 17:59:34
In reply to Therapy, posted by Angela2 on September 5, 2005, at 15:59:52
hey Angela,
Would it be possible to talk to your T about this? She may have suggestions on becoming less dependent on her.
what you said about your brother and advisor...is it hurting the relationships or does it just feel like it is? One alternative to talking with them maybe could be to talk with people here about those things.take care,
Rain
Posted by alexandra_k on September 5, 2005, at 18:09:10
In reply to Therapy, posted by Angela2 on September 5, 2005, at 15:59:52
Ah... Social skills....
I have trouble there too. Have spouts of withdrawing and not returning phone calls etc. Just kind of disappearing off the face of the earth. And then spouts of getting a bit too close. Saying more than I probably should etc.Its hard.
And I think it takes a bit of time to make headway on that kind of thing.Sometimes I find it hard about the therapy too...
But then everybody has things they like to do away from their friends.I think... It doesn't matter so much being dependent short term. I mean, if you are going to your t to help you deal with interpersonal stuff that comes up then she might be helping you learn the very skills that are going to enable you to be more self-sufficient and less dependent on your therapist in the long run.
I remember bringing a lot of relationship stuff to my t...
But I think she helped me deal with it.
See some of the push / pull that was going on.
Starting to figure out when that was happening.
Starting to act more balanced despite how I felt.Dependence is hard...
But then if they are helping
I guess its pretty understandable to feel a little dependent for a time...
Posted by Angela2 on September 8, 2005, at 18:16:50
In reply to Re: Therapy, posted by rainbowbrite on September 5, 2005, at 17:59:34
Yeah, I think I just imagined that I was making my relationship with them bad. I think I better tell my t that, or she'll keep bringing it up and trying to change me =P
Posted by gardenergirl on September 8, 2005, at 23:32:34
In reply to Re: Therapy » Angela2, posted by alexandra_k on September 5, 2005, at 18:09:10
Hi Angela2,
I just wanted to comment on the attachment/dependence thing. I think in many cases, you need to become more attached and a bit dependent for awhile in order to do the hardest work. I think that helps foster trust and deepening in what you are talking about...really getting into the hard stuff...which othewise might not feel safe if you couldn't depend on your T.It's also a bit like how an infant or small child has to depend on the parents for safety, comfort, security, and learning. At least it's supposed to be that way. But many of us didn't get that much security in childhood. So getting a sort of second chance to have that and to develop from that experience can be very valuable.
But at some point, the therapy shifts to you being less attached and less dependent. That needs to happen, too, and it usually does.
But I can understand worrying about feeling dependent. I have worried about that and if it makes me "weak" and such before. I've worried that I will never get better enough to feel ready to terminate. My T always reassures me that I'm not weak or helpless, and I feel better about the attachment now.
gg
Posted by rainbowbrite on September 10, 2005, at 21:11:48
In reply to Re: Therapy, posted by Angela2 on September 8, 2005, at 18:16:50
How are you doing?
Posted by Angela2 on September 11, 2005, at 20:36:12
In reply to Angela, posted by rainbowbrite on September 10, 2005, at 21:11:48
I'm alright. Went on a boat tour with my family today. They fought the whole way there but other than that it was nice to get out. I'm gonna post something soon about things I need to address in therapy.
Posted by rainbowbrite on September 11, 2005, at 21:12:35
In reply to Re: Angela, posted by Angela2 on September 11, 2005, at 20:36:12
> I'm alright. Went on a boat tour with my family today. They fought the whole way there but other than that it was nice to get out.
Thats too bad, but the fresh air and water must have been nice.
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