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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by pinkeye on July 3, 2005, at 21:25:02
My recent realization is that no amount of therapy or insight into ourselves, is really enough to make us happy.
I am a perfect example -I have really really good insight into myself, I can almost findout what motivates each of my actions and feelings. And nowadys I can answer all the questions about "why I am the way I am " - like how each of my feelings directly relate to how I was brought up etc.
But it is not enough.. In fact, too much of insight is really not that good - it makes me feel worse.
I am beginning to think you cannot really ever achieve happiness by being in therapy for a life time even.
Happiness comes only from meditation, doing things, seeing movies, experiencing positive things, having good relationships, praying etc.
Beyond a point, there really is no need for developing more insight.. It is probably good to develop some insight and identify some patterns, but really trying to dig it all out so to speak in the hope of cleaning it up does not work. It really makes it worse. (atleast for me).
A better thing to do would have been to develop some insight, but instead focus on doing lot of other positive things.
I just thought I would share - in case somebody is trying to break their head in trying to understand themselves and wishing they understood themselves better.. it really doesn't matter too much. to a certain extent it helps, but you don't have to udnersand everything about yourself.
Posted by Emily Elizabeth on July 3, 2005, at 23:52:24
In reply to Therapy is only half the game, posted by pinkeye on July 3, 2005, at 21:25:02
> I just thought I would share - in case somebody is trying to break their head in trying to understand themselves and wishing they understood themselves better.. it really doesn't matter too much. to a certain extent it helps, but you don't have to udnersand everything about yourself.I just want to stress that this is YOUR experience and opinon--not an absolute truth. People are very different. Person A can have problems and go to therapy and learn some techniques on how to address it. Person A may gain little to no insight, but she does just fine. That's all she needed. On the other hand, person B may find that kind of therapy empty. She may crave lots and lots of insight before she can feel whole. There isn't one way that is better than the other and there is no surefire way to achieve happiness.
I'm glad that you are coming to understand the value of insight for you and I appreciate that you are trying to help fellow babblers.
EE
Posted by alexandra_k on July 4, 2005, at 0:01:41
In reply to Therapy is only half the game, posted by pinkeye on July 3, 2005, at 21:25:02
'Insight' is a tricky notion...
How do you tell the difference between 'insight' and a false feeling of conviction? The behaviourists puzzled over that for a while and came up with this result: the measure of insight is behaviour change. Someone has insight into the cause of their behaviour when they are able to act differently. There is false insight or false awareness when the client seems to have 'insight' but actually doesn't go on to act differently.With the cognitive revolution it once again makes sense to talk of insight divorced from the behaviour that follows it. It makes sense to talk of insight that doesn't help one act differently.
Hmm.
I think that it is one thing to have insight into why one is the way that one is. And it is another thing to be able to figure out how to act different. And there isn't any such thing as having 'insight' into everything all at once. Rather life can be a series of insights or realisations...
But change...
Thats a different story.
Change can happen with or without awareness...I think it is insightful to see that therapy can't solve all of ones problems.
And that there are things we do outside therapy that makes life meaningful / worthwhile.
Posted by pinkeye on July 4, 2005, at 11:33:28
In reply to Re: Therapy is only half the game, posted by Emily Elizabeth on July 3, 2005, at 23:52:24
Thanks Emily. What you said is so true.. What works for one may or may not work for the other.
What I said always comes only from my experience - I shouldn't have generalized it.
Posted by pinkeye on July 4, 2005, at 11:35:35
In reply to Re: Therapy is only half the game, posted by alexandra_k on July 4, 2005, at 0:01:41
yeah. true.
:-)You guys here are just so awesome.. I have this either/or thinking many times, and I get caught right away !!!.
Posted by Dinah on July 4, 2005, at 12:47:14
In reply to Therapy is only half the game, posted by pinkeye on July 3, 2005, at 21:25:02
Insight doesn't always mean dwelling on the past. It can also mean accepting yourself as you are, and understanding your reasons for being as you are, and with complete acceptance comes the ability to make changes, if you desire to make them.
I'm a bit prejudiced, because I've spent a lifetime among those who desire no insight whatsoever. And it's caused me a lot of pain.
Posted by pinkeye on July 4, 2005, at 14:12:39
In reply to Re: Therapy is only half the game » pinkeye, posted by Dinah on July 4, 2005, at 12:47:14
you always have a nice way with words Dinah !!!. I love what you post.
Posted by antigua on July 7, 2005, at 12:03:37
In reply to Therapy is only half the game, posted by pinkeye on July 3, 2005, at 21:25:02
With all due respect, I disagree. The insight that I have gained through long-term therapy has enabled me to understand and accept myself so that I can enjoy my life, including my relationships, meditation, etc., and it has strengthened my spiritual life considerably. I do not believe I would have the faith I do now if I hadn't been through this.
best,
antigua
This is the end of the thread.
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