Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 479461

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Unfounded anger towards T

Posted by JLynn on April 3, 2005, at 20:45:46

My sessions have been going fairly well lately. I recently disclosed something that I had never told anyone. She said this was a big step and that she was proud of me. She agreed to increase my sessions to once a week because I felt that it would help me keep from going backwards instead of forwards with this. So things have been progressing a little the last few weeks. Last week we didn't really talk about anything important. That was mainly because I really didn't want to get into anything heavy and she didn't push. I was fine with that. However, today I have been feeling a lot of anger towards her. I don't understand this. She didn't do anything to cause this anger. It is really frustrating me. I really like my T. I don't see her again until Thursday, but I don't want to go if I am still feeling angry at her because she doesn't deserve it. Has anyone else ever felt this unfounded anger at their T? Any ideas why I feel this way towards her? What should I do? UGH!!! :-(

 

Re: Unfounded anger towards T JLynn

Posted by Dinah on April 3, 2005, at 21:46:41

In reply to Unfounded anger towards T, posted by JLynn on April 3, 2005, at 20:45:46

I usually *thought* I had a reason. :) Although sometimes I found that the reason I thought I was mad wasn't really the reason I was mad.

Trying to talk yourself out of the anger because you don't feel you should be angry probably won't get you the answer. Have you tried listening to the anger? Being open and receptive to whatever irrational thoughts enter your mind?

Sometimes when I do that, when I don't understand why I feel the way I feel, I get unexpected snippets of information about myself.

 

Re: Unfounded anger towards T JLynn

Posted by alexandra_k on April 3, 2005, at 21:56:01

In reply to Unfounded anger towards T, posted by JLynn on April 3, 2005, at 20:45:46

Has it got something to do with what you disclosed to her? Did what you disclose have anything to do with a situation where you would feel angry that that happened or that someone would do something like that?

When have you felt angry like this before?

Is there someone who you more understandably could be angry at?

It might be that you are really angry about someone or something else and you are transferring those feelings on to her...

 

Re: Unfounded anger towards T JLynn

Posted by thewrite1 on April 4, 2005, at 0:38:33

In reply to Unfounded anger towards T, posted by JLynn on April 3, 2005, at 20:45:46

Is it possible that you wanted your T to push you? I only bring it up because I get that way sometimes. I leave feeling like the session was a total waste and that if she would have just pushed me the smallest bit, it would have made it easier for me to get things out.

It's almost like we've been learning to tango together the past few years. There's give and take and she's worked hard to learn what I need and when I need it. Sometimes she's still not sure so she'll say, "I'm going to push a little bit here, but..."

 

Re: Unfounded anger towards T JLynn

Posted by Shortelise on April 4, 2005, at 12:58:13

In reply to Unfounded anger towards T, posted by JLynn on April 3, 2005, at 20:45:46

It's common to feel anger toward out T's when dealing with scary stuff.

Talk with her about it, tell her how you feel, and look at it together. She is used to clients having these feelings, knows all about it and will help you explore it.

I got so angry with my T when I was going through some hard stuff - I used to go for run/walks and just pound the suttfing out of the pavement. And I was just relentless with him, accusing and just so angry. He was wonderful, kept as cool as cool.

Anger is absolutely OK, and "normal", and expected, and something that so many of us in therapy deal with. I believe it's important to talk it out with your T. Talk about it!!!!!

Hugs. I know how awful it can feel.

ShortE

 

Re: Unfounded anger towards T JLynn

Posted by Poet on April 4, 2005, at 18:28:40

In reply to Unfounded anger towards T, posted by JLynn on April 3, 2005, at 20:45:46

Hi JLynne,

I get angry at my T, especially after I've disclosed something that I really don't want to talk about ever again.

Let her know you're angry at her. I let my T know when I'm mad at her, though she usually can see it on my face. I evidentally give her a real dirty look, which she gives back to get me to laugh.

Poet


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