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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 12 to 36 of 70. Go back in thread:
Posted by 10derheart on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:17
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me, posted by zazenducke on July 13, 2012, at 14:02:02
>>I can't say I miss the *snort*ing and snarking days of yore myself.
oh I think you do....at least a little...on a certain level....
Posted by zazenducke on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:18
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » zazenducke, posted by 10derheart on July 13, 2012, at 16:36:01
> >>I can't say I miss the *snort*ing and snarking days of yore myself.
>
> oh I think you do....at least a little...on a certain level....No I really don't. I miss having fun on Babble but I don't miss the deputy system at all which is what I was referring to.. I prefer an exDeputy that calls people *ssh*l*s to a Deputy that blocked people for months at a time for not being as adept as her in bullying without committing "incivility".
It's been interesting watching the group dynamics here.
Posted by Dinah on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:18
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » 10derheart, posted by zazenducke on July 13, 2012, at 17:27:39
Please don't accuse me of bullying. As deputy, I enforced the rules I did, and do, largely believe in. They may have been word games to you. They never were to me. I saw the reasons behind them. I never liked blocking anyone, and those who know me well know that. I can't change what you think of me, of course. And I suppose at this point, you're free to say whatever you like to me, without the slightest fear of administrative involvement. All I can do is request that you not.
I liked the rule about not calling people names. I'd have loved for Dr. Bob to have given a d*mn and moderated on that thread. Had I any reasonable expectation of administrative involvement, I doubt I'd have gotten so frustrated. Lowering my Lamictal probably hurt as well.
I don't know whether Dr. Bob cares enough to write studies about us anymore. But if he does, I imagine this would be an interesting next study. I hope he recognizes that Babble today can't in any way be compared to the thriving internet community it used to be. How many regular posters are there? How many new posters?
I personally don't see lord of the flies here at this point. (Of course, I don't read every post.) But my experience with internet forums in general is that unmoderated forums are not known for their kindness. As people internalize Dr. Bob's lack of presence, I wonder what will happen. I hope I'm wrong and that the small remaining community are those who value kindness, forbearance, and support for its own sake.
Posted by zazenducke on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:18
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » zazenducke, posted by Dinah on July 13, 2012, at 19:02:01
Dinah my personal experience and observation of you was that you bullied others during your time as a deputy.
Posted by Dinah on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:19
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » Dinah, posted by zazenducke on July 13, 2012, at 19:08:01
I think that, as with so many things in life, people see the facts and infer the "truth". You and I both saw the results, and we differ as to the truth of my motivations. As much as I dislike Dr. Bob's using actions rather than motivations as the criteria for his judgments, I do see there are some ways in which that *is* fair.
I try to remain open to the idea that my view of the motivations of others could be completely mistaken. I think of you as someone who attempts to do good as much as I did as deputy. I see you trying to protect those who you feel need protection, or those you see as worthy of protection, against those you see as those who are harming them. Yet sometimes, I don't agree with you as to who needs protection and, far more importantly, who deserves whatever you say.
I've cried countless hours over what you've said to me over the years, and I am not alone in this.
I am aware of one time when I misunderstood what was going on with you, and acted on that misunderstanding. I tried later to fix it, but by then Dr. Bob was involved, and it was no longer up to me. I regretted that then, and I still regret it. Every time you say something that hurts me, I remember that moment, and realize that I do deserve for you to dislike me. When I say to people that I've been disliked by people who really can hurt me, your name is one of the top in my mind.
But even given that, I think you misjudge my motivations and my thoughts. And I ask that you not accuse me based on your inferences. I ask that you consider that if you think it's wrong for deputies to judge who is the victim and who is worthy of blocking, that you also consider whether it's right for individuals to decide who is and isn't worthy of kindness.
Posted by Dinah on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:19
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » zazenducke, posted by Dinah on July 13, 2012, at 19:40:40
Well, I may be alone in the actual *crying* part.
Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:19
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me, posted by Dinah on July 13, 2012, at 20:07:14
hey phillipa...just curious to know who it is...anyways my babblemail is not on...maybe like facebook and ill keep it confidencial. Thanks...but reatlly theres some posters here that judge me on a sitation I can't even change for the current period of time. It's like when im posing for some support the opposite thing happens...which is not ironic...but it just irratates me that people judge grass for not growing in the desert....well theres alot of evil stuff people plan and say in their minds so it doesnt suprise me....
love ya!
rj
Posted by SLS on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:20
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » Dinah, posted by zazenducke on July 13, 2012, at 19:08:01
> Dinah my personal experience and observation of you was that you bullied others during your time as a deputy.
Where was I during these times? I was gone for about 1 1/2 years several years ago. Maybe these things occurred during my absence? Otherwise, I must disagree with your opinion. I don't know what you experienced personally or otherwise observed, but the word "bullying" represents a judgment of a behavior, and not the behavior itself. My best guess is that you and I read the same posts, but perceived them very differently. I did not see behaviors of Dinah that would lead me to judge her actions to be bullying.
Perhaps this thread should be redirected to Administration.
- Scott
Posted by 10derheart on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:20
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » zazenducke, posted by SLS on July 14, 2012, at 0:44:49
>>Perhaps this thread should be redirected to Administration.
Yuh. Fat chance of that. Or perhaps only *my* recent pleadings for redirections and other things fall on the deaf ears of any "administration."
Posted by 10derheart on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:20
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me, posted by Dinah on July 13, 2012, at 20:07:14
Doubt it. In fact,.....well, nevermind.
Posted by marylou333 on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:21
In reply to If you Can't Say Anything Nice Say Nothing, posted by Phillipa on July 12, 2012, at 12:21:46
I an a lurker , but to me all the mods had many flaw,s to judge posts. Take Dinah, many problems herself, carnt even function without a theropist for 20 years. Who needs theropist for 20 year,s thats not healthy, her husband must feel a little inadequate. Theropy that long is wrong what more can be said after 20 years you carn tell you husband. Totally wrong to judge other peoples post when she needs a theropist herself just to survive. Dinah what if he dies tommorow do you.
Posted by SLS on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:21
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Say Nothing, posted by marylou333 on July 14, 2012, at 4:12:44
> I an a lurker , but to me all the mods had many flaw,s to judge posts. Take Dinah, many problems herself, carnt even function without a theropist for 20 years. Who needs theropist for 20 year,s thats not healthy, her husband must feel a little inadequate. Theropy that long is wrong what more can be said after 20 years you carn tell you husband. Totally wrong to judge other peoples post when she needs a theropist herself just to survive. Dinah what if he dies tommorow do you.
Don't we already know you?
I think there should be some discourse on Administration about how to handle situations in which a blocked poster infiltrates a thread. Is it desirable to delete the whole thread, or only those posts made by the offender? As things are managed at the moment, I foresee this whole thread disappearing. That, of course, is ruinous to the contributions of others.
I'd like to see more written about the phenomenologies of spanking, physical abuse, and neglect, and how these things affect the psyche of the child and his social environment. However, I would say that the Psychology board is a better forum for such a discussion.
- Scott
Posted by Dinah on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:22
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » zazenducke, posted by SLS on July 14, 2012, at 0:44:49
Thanks Scott.
A simple statement like that can ease a lot of hurt.
Posted by Dinah on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:22
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » Dinah, posted by 10derheart on July 14, 2012, at 1:27:19
Well, I didn't want to make any assumptions. :(
Posted by Dinah on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:23
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » SLS, posted by 10derheart on July 14, 2012, at 1:26:23
Not only yours. Before long I daresay we'll fall into learned helplessness and quit trying to reach Dr. Bob at all.
Posted by marylou333 on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:23
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » 10derheart, posted by Dinah on July 14, 2012, at 5:55:34
Its a valid point to all blocked posters, mods with problem , moderating babble,s with different problems, carnt be done im affraid, like other,s with strong religious belief, telling you the power of god while suffeing hidious depression for 40 years, why believe if the guy distroys your life, its like takeing a med that is totally wrong for you , but you still keep takeing it.This forum hasnt moved on in years ,same med advice ,shuffled around like a pack of cards, we have just come full circle for the 10th time.And everyone is just the same totally wasted of all thats normal in life. NEW MEDS ,there is no new meds just remixes old meds, all the new ground breakers have disolved in there own hype an side effects. Why is it on babble that normal mentally ill people that get mad though stress or illness are told to be cival, like they are a fully ajusted adult because if thats what they were then babble would be the last thing on there mind., No real welcome for newbies with there first med , they dont come hear after haveing the posts egnored because there to trivial. There nobody in, an the light have gone out. HOW MANY BABBLERS DOSE IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB
Posted by SLS on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:23
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me, posted by marylou333 on July 14, 2012, at 7:01:02
> HOW MANY BABBLERS DOSE IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB
None.
The light here always shines bright. Some people don't like the light, though. It's an occasional poster who sometimes burns out. Depression is darkness. If exposed to the light of caring and understanding people, such burned-out posters often renew their source of inner energy to shine again.
- Scott
Posted by zazenducke on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:24
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » zazenducke, posted by SLS on July 14, 2012, at 0:44:49
> > Dinah my personal experience and observation of you was that you bullied others during your time as a deputy.
>
> Where was I during these times? I was gone for about 1 1/2 years several years ago. Maybe these things occurred during my absence? Otherwise, I must disagree with your opinion. I don't know what you experienced personally or otherwise observed, but the word "bullying" represents a judgment of a behavior, and not the behavior itself. My best guess is that you and I read the same posts, but perceived them very differently.
Of course it represents a judgement Scott. Judgement is not a bad thing! Your belief that you were mistreated during your childhood is just a judgement on your part. If nobody agreed with your judgement would it mean it didn't happen?
Bullying can easily be condoned or overlooked by people who choose to. And part of the Babble culture included just that.
I did not see behaviors of Dinah that would lead me to judge her actions to be bullying.
>I wouldn't expect you to Scott, but not because they weren't as I described. You are very invested in the status quo here and your deference towards authority has always been remarkable.
> Perhaps this thread should be redirected to Administration.
Please direct your future responses to Administration. Be the change you want to see!!!
>
>
> - Scott
Posted by zazenducke on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:24
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me, posted by marylou333 on July 14, 2012, at 7:01:02
Posted by sleepygirl2 on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:25
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Say Nothing, posted by marylou333 on July 14, 2012, at 4:12:44
Hey,
Wtf?
How is that anything but cruel?
Do you think of yourself that way?
Posted by zazenducke on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:25
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Say Nothing, posted by marylou333 on July 14, 2012, at 4:12:44
Dinah has permission to engage in therapy at will as long as it doesn't interfere with her wifely duties. (Sorry I couldn't resist I always thought that was one of the all time funniest posts)
> I an a lurker , but to me all the mods had many flaw,s to judge posts. Take Dinah, many problems herself, carnt even function without a theropist for 20 years. Who needs theropist for 20 year,s thats not healthy, her husband must feel a little inadequate. Theropy that long is wrong what more can be said after 20 years you carn tell you husband. Totally wrong to judge other peoples post when she needs a theropist herself just to survive. Dinah what if he dies tommorow do you.
Posted by marylou333 on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:25
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » marylou333, posted by SLS on July 14, 2012, at 7:17:05
SCOTT, do you talk mabye of Dracular with your crap random try at a put down. look man give up trying to be dr, bob juinor an a theropist at the same time, your just a middle class unemployed internet surfer,nothing more nothing less. You may have had your fan club 5 years ago , but alas no more,people have seen you crash an burn more than Martin Sheen , so they got on there bike an rode into the sunset
Posted by Emily Elizabeth on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:26
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me, posted by marylou333 on July 14, 2012, at 8:47:14
Ironically, I think this thread proves the point that we are incapable of monitoring ourselves.
It saddens me to see kindhearted people like Dinah and Scott attacked. We don't all need to agree on everything to have conversations.
Best,
EE
Posted by SLS on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:26
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me » SLS, posted by zazenducke on July 14, 2012, at 7:20:35
> > I did not see behaviors of Dinah that would lead me to judge her actions to be bullying.
> I wouldn't expect you to Scott, but not because they weren't as I described. You are very invested in the status quo here and your deference towards authority has always been remarkable.
You are very predictable, if not consistent. I would have expected nothing less of you than to assume suppositions about my attitudes, loyalties, investments, need for stasis, and my complex relationship with authority. Simplistic rhetoric coming from you is disappointing. Actually, I was wondering what took you so long.
> > Perhaps this thread should be redirected to Administration.
> Please direct your future responses to Administration. Be the change you want to see!!!I would, except I don't know how. Could you please explain to me how to go about redirecting a thread?
Thanks.
As you have an opinion, so have I.
Gotta stir those pots...
- Scott
Posted by SLS on July 14, 2012, at 19:26:26
In reply to Re: If you Can't Say Anything Nice Talk To Me, posted by marylou333 on July 14, 2012, at 8:47:14
> SCOTT, do you talk mabye of Dracular with your crap random try at a put down. look man give up trying to be dr, bob juinor an a theropist at the same time, your just a middle class unemployed internet surfer,nothing more nothing less. You may have had your fan club 5 years ago , but alas no more,people have seen you crash an burn more than Martin Sheen , so they got on there bike an rode into the sunset
Sorry. I confused you for Manic666.
I apologize.
It is doubtful that I shall confuse the two of you again.
- Scott
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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