Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 126351

Shown: posts 1 to 21 of 21. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type

Posted by amy_oz on November 4, 2002, at 0:20:08

Hi,
My therapist has just told me that theres a possibility that I could be bi-polar and having done a lot of research myself and think its a possibility.

I've had problems with depression for years, usually during winter when I get really lethargic and feel that I'm useless. This year it was different, really panicky but with constant agitation and couldn't move much without panic attacks. no sleep, massive weight loss, couldn't eat, wanting to cry but couldn't,incredibly sad, psychotic epsisodes (thought the world was ending amongst other things), suicidality, racing thoughts etc etc......

All the reading I've done points to mixed state. So what do I do?? I'm currently on Paxil and am apathy central. I know that I should be adding a mood stabilizer into the mix. My therapist and GP have booked me to see a pdoc but I want to go in prepared.

What recommendations are out there? I'm thinking maybe dropping the paxil and picking up Wellbutrin and Neurontin. Is there anyone out there who has been through something similar? What worked for you? I'm still a little freaked about this change in dx as its more of a lifetime illness that a depressive episode......

Thanks,
Amy

 

Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type

Posted by Krysti on November 4, 2002, at 8:53:19

In reply to ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type, posted by amy_oz on November 4, 2002, at 0:20:08

Hi Amy,

I understand what you're going through. I just went through it myself, although my story is a little different. I went on Paxil for anxiety which I had suffered from for 6 years. Within three months I became manic and delusional, although fortunately most of my delusions were on the happy side (I thought my chiropractor was on his way over to my house to ask me to marry him - I wasn't even dating him!). I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and put on Depakote.

Most importantly though, I found out that when you are Bipolar, AD's alone make it worse. It is imperative to be on a mood stabilizer.

I ended up switching from the Depakote to Gabitril because the Depakote was making me gain weight. I also recently added an anti-depressant, Lexapro, to the Gabitril because I was becoming depressed on the mood stabilizer alone. I am doing much better now.

I understand where you're coming from, not wanting to be diagnosed with a life-long illness, but having the proper diagnosis will put you on your way to feeling better. Getting on the right medications for it is the most important thing.

Let me know if you have any other questions about it - I will do my best to try and answer them.

Krysti

 

Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type

Posted by ST on November 5, 2002, at 3:19:38

In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type, posted by Krysti on November 4, 2002, at 8:53:19

Hi Amy,

From what I've gathered, you must be on a mood stabilizer as well as some kind of antidepressant if you're bi polar. I am on Wellbutrin and Depakote and Serzone. I think some doctors are hesitant about giving Wellbutrin because it's an energizing AD. I'm bi polar 2, but have had few hypo-manic episodes. I don't know much about Neurontin, but Lithium and Depakote seem to be pretty "tried and true" for bi polars. I have not gained weight on Depakote, but am on a small dose. (I gained weight on a different AD, though.)

It's great you're doing research before going in to your doctor. I often go in to my doctor and suggest a change in my dosage, medications, etc because I take charge of my illness and try to learn as much as I can. After doing some research, I, too, just knew I was bi polar.

Good luck!
Sarah

 

Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type

Posted by rayww on November 5, 2002, at 19:38:53

In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type, posted by ST on November 5, 2002, at 3:19:38

When I was told I may be bipolar it set me to study also. For the past two years I have been trying to decide if I am or not. It is so hard to know for sure when you are born a certain way, and have lived with yourself for over 50 years. The only way to know for sure is to get to the point where you aren't and look back. I believe I am closer to that point by taking supplements than I was when medicated. It's a horrible thing to be told you are bipolar and that maybe your ideas and what you have said and done may have been out of whack and far out. I have had such a struggle with that. I have resolved that bipolar is a gift that can bring power to you if harnessed. It can also be a curse if you let it take you down. Lifestyle and personal health habits are central to coming to a true understanding of what bipolar means.

 

Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » amy_oz

Posted by BarbaraCat on November 7, 2002, at 2:48:07

In reply to ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type, posted by amy_oz on November 4, 2002, at 0:20:08

Dear Amy,
Oh my goodness, I can surely relate. What you are describing is most assuredly bipolar mixed states. I also was 'reclassified' just recently, mainly due to my own research and info on this board. The bleak, despairing, despondent wailing depressions mixed with agitated psychosis are a thing to behold. Amazing stuff of nightmares. The good news is in knowing that your ailment has a name and also that there is a med regimen that will help. AD's are NOT a good idea, even with a mood stabilizer. The black whirlpool will eventually break through. What is helping me is Lamictal and Lithium with lorezapam or clonezapam for anxiety. Also, B vitamins and fish oil and living a squeaky clean lifestyle (oh, I do enjoy a snootfull of liquor now and then). Paxil is NOT the med for you. Be prepared also for possible intense withdrawal from Paxil, but it eventually passes. Believe me, I know what you're going through. You can rest assured of being helped, even though you can't possibly believe this when in the grip of a mixed states depression. But hang in there, and by all means, get a pdoc who understands this slippery weird condition.

 

Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type

Posted by amy_oz on November 8, 2002, at 0:22:09

In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » amy_oz, posted by BarbaraCat on November 7, 2002, at 2:48:07

Thanks so much to everyone for writing such supportive comments. The more I do research the more I am sure that I must be bipolar. I passed this info onto my sister who I suspected was also bipolar. Up until now she had been considered atypical depression + ADD. She rang me back in tears and said it rang true for her as well.

So its off to the pdoc for us to get hold of some Lamictal to start with (thanks Barbaracat)and I'll be keeping up with the vitamins, mineral and omega 3's.

Please keep in touch

Amy

 

Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » BarbaraCat

Posted by Brandymac26 on November 8, 2002, at 8:30:31

In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » amy_oz, posted by BarbaraCat on November 7, 2002, at 2:48:07

I would like to know if you could give me some website links that go in detail about bipolar disorder. I am really starting to think that I may be bipolar, and have been told by numerous people that I definetley could be. The thread "need help w/ diagnosis" explains some of my symptoms. The reason I'm having such a hard time finding info is b/c most sites I've been to expalain Bipolar1, and that doesnt really fit me. I have really bad depression, get into mixed states (both of the criteria for these states fit me), but the manis phase is what s throwing me off. I dont go without sleep, or become real creative, and want to go, go, go, all the time. I get real irritable, panicky, and sometime make decisions that arent the best in the world. Like I will decide I'm gonna quit my job and go back to school full time. Of course a couple of weeks down the road I realize I was an idiot for doing this, b/c I need the monsy, and I get depressed, quit school, and then end up in a mixed state with wierd episodes of feeling like people are watching me in the shower, or the worl is ending, or that I have some terrible disease and every time the phon erings its my doc calling to report bad news.
What is confusing is that I've never been suicidal, when i get depressed all I want to do is sleep b/c I'm exhausted, and I dont want anyone or anything to bother me. On the other hand, I never really get fully manic either. Now, as a teenager, and into my early 20's, I fit the manic profile to a "T". Nothing that I felt coincided with what was going on in my life, i always wanted to go out and party, stay up all night, made really stupid decisions and wondered later why I did what I did. But now, i dont ever get that bad. I just get really panicky, irritated, make bad decisions etc. Does this fit into any bipolar spectrums? Every website I have been to says that you really have to be manic, and I almost have a hard time understanding what that is b/c even as a teenager, I thought my behavior was part of my personality. I am on lexapro(10mg's), and it's helped a little w/ my anxiety, but not really done anything for the depression. I'm at a loss here. I dont know whats wrong with me. Thanks
Brandy

 

Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type

Posted by fluffy on November 8, 2002, at 13:59:05

In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » BarbaraCat, posted by Brandymac26 on November 8, 2002, at 8:30:31

Hi you guys!

Thanks so much for all of your support through this crappy time for me! (and hi Brandy...)
I just got diagnosed BP2 today. It's important to know that manic behavior doesn't have to involve shopping sprees or crime. I just recently figured out that I never really got manic...just hypomanic. And a lot of my friends behave in such ways...but they don't have major depressions every year either. The depressive jags are sometimes the only way to figure this stuff out. I, too thought that my hypomania was just normal behavior. But in 3 years, I moved 5 (yeah that's right..5!) times around this city to find the place that was going to make me feel happy...drank like a fish--so much so that people would have to take me home...couldn't keep a job because I'd start coming up with agendas...(i switched jobs 4 times in 3 years) couldn't concentrate on my artwork because of all of my agendas...on message boards taunting people at work and writing "exposes".

Arguably, this could be a result of just getting out of grad school and trying to settle. But the depressions (BAD ones...) kept returning.

My doc put me on a tiny dose of zoloft and neurontin...my aunt is on this and seems well.
We'll see.

But I wanted to thank you guys for helping me to figure this shit out.

Hang in there Brandy...Find a GOOD pdoc if you possibly can! It is worth the investment...it's your life!

Thanks again guys.


 

Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » Brandymac26

Posted by BarbaraCat on November 8, 2002, at 14:48:48

In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » BarbaraCat, posted by Brandymac26 on November 8, 2002, at 8:30:31

Dear BrandyMac,
Thanks for your post. First of all, here are some websites that were very helpful for me:

http://www.psycheducation.org/depression/frameset.html
http://www.psycheducation.com/depression/frameset.html
http://www.bipolarworld.net

These entire websites are filled with info and very good so explore.

Also the book 'Why your depression isn't getting better', by Dr. M. Bartos. You can get it at Amazon.com

I also did a Google search on bipolar AND "mixed states" and turned up a few good ones. You won't find a whole lot since it's a new diagnosis, but enough to recognize your symptoms. In the meantime, let me share with you some of my own experiences and see if it resonates. This will be long, so read as much as you want. Much of it is for myself as I seek to clarify it in my own mind.

First of all, I think I know what you're going through and it's so scary and fragmented when you don't know what the hell is going on. Take heart, though, because what you're experiencing fits bipolar II mixed-states spectrum to a perfect 'T'. That may not seem like something to take relief in because, oh God, bipolar, that's too weird, too stigmacized, crazy even, OH GOD, LITHIUM!!. However, with this knowledge and some understanding of this very interesting disorder, you can arm yourself with a plan, a context to put it all in, and develop great compassion for yourself.

It's the stuff of genius and great energy and the anguish of Paradise Lost. But it's so hard to love ourselves when we look back from a state of depression on our foolish impulsive irresponsible manic escapades. It may be fun at the time, but afterwards you're exhausted and rather ashamed of calling so much attention to yourself, especially with work related things. I used to go out with folks after work, or to company parties and drink wine and Margaritas and a hypomanic state would just come upon me, triggered by the high energy of the situation. It doesn't take much to flip me into a wild and crazy state, even at 51 years old. I'd be the first and last one up on the dance floor, breaking into a wild bellydance in the middle of a circle clapping me on. I'd tell raucous dirty jokes to my manager and his wife and then drag everyone at the table up to do a rhumba around the room. At the end of the event, everyone would be ready to turn in, but no not me, I'm still prowling and milking the juice of life ready to screw my brains out, the heck with my husband. Very fun, very entertaining, but then I'd have to go back to work and realize everyone thought I was a bit of a drunken wild floozey. Or at least I was paranoid that they did. Not good for the systems analyst project manager I used to be.

I also would have spells of not sleeping, bursts of creativity, buying hundreds of dollars of plants and bulbs and then getting too disorganized to plant them. Bags and bags of tulip bulbs moldering away in a garage that is chock full of 'stuff', crafts, projects that got started and never completed, boxes and boxes of stuff. Sure wish I had the money I spent on this crap. I hate going in there and keep promising I'm going to clean it out now that I'm on the mend. I know it will free up alot of stuck energy.

That was the fun side of hypomania. It can be very infectious and daring and devil-may-care. But the disorganization, the agitation and paranoia, the sense of doom and destruction and black despair and intense raw sensitivity - that's not fun at all, and that's what mixed states is. It's the same wild energy, but gone into the wrong channel, the 'Horror Channel'. All that creative energy gone kerflooey. There's also the usual vegetative stuck drab grey depression that can come on, but mixed states is something else altogether and it's own category of bipolar. Those web sites will explain alot of it.

We can't take SSRI's or any other antidepressant without a mood stabilizer. This is crucial. Not taking any antidepressant is best, but we're usually on one at the start and have to wean off. Lamictal and lithium are what are saving me. I also have to take a benzo at times. I really think this condition is an electrical imbalance in our brains rather than a 'chemical' one. The mood stabilizers work on this electrical 'neuron gate' theory and balance the electrical impulses between the two hemispheres of the brain. Fish oil (12 grams) also is very helpful. You're in the company of alot of creative genuis and other tortured souls, but at least we have meds that really work, namely Lamictal and lithium, both together. Well, that's my diatribe for now. - BarbaraCat


> I would like to know if you could give me some website links that go in detail about bipolar disorder. I am really starting to think that I may be bipolar, and have been told by numerous people that I definetley could be. The thread "need help w/ diagnosis" explains some of my symptoms. The reason I'm having such a hard time finding info is b/c most sites I've been to expalain Bipolar1, and that doesnt really fit me. I have really bad depression, get into mixed states (both of the criteria for these states fit me), but the manis phase is what s throwing me off. I dont go without sleep, or become real creative, and want to go, go, go, all the time. I get real irritable, panicky, and sometime make decisions that arent the best in the world. Like I will decide I'm gonna quit my job and go back to school full time. Of course a couple of weeks down the road I realize I was an idiot for doing this, b/c I need the monsy, and I get depressed, quit school, and then end up in a mixed state with wierd episodes of feeling like people are watching me in the shower, or the worl is ending, or that I have some terrible disease and every time the phon erings its my doc calling to report bad news.
> What is confusing is that I've never been suicidal, when i get depressed all I want to do is sleep b/c I'm exhausted, and I dont want anyone or anything to bother me. On the other hand, I never really get fully manic either. Now, as a teenager, and into my early 20's, I fit the manic profile to a "T". Nothing that I felt coincided with what was going on in my life, i always wanted to go out and party, stay up all night, made really stupid decisions and wondered later why I did what I did. But now, i dont ever get that bad. I just get really panicky, irritated, make bad decisions etc. Does this fit into any bipolar spectrums? Every website I have been to says that you really have to be manic, and I almost have a hard time understanding what that is b/c even as a teenager, I thought my behavior was part of my personality. I am on lexapro(10mg's), and it's helped a little w/ my anxiety, but not really done anything for the depression. I'm at a loss here. I dont know whats wrong with me. Thanks
> Brandy

 

It's finally making sense! Yay for us BP-2s!! (nm)

Posted by BarbaraCat on November 8, 2002, at 14:53:35

In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type, posted by fluffy on November 8, 2002, at 13:59:05

 

Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » fluffy

Posted by Brandymac26 on November 8, 2002, at 16:52:14

In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type, posted by fluffy on November 8, 2002, at 13:59:05

> Hi you guys!
>
> Thanks so much for all of your support through this crappy time for me! (and hi Brandy...)
> I just got diagnosed BP2 today. It's important to know that manic behavior doesn't have to involve shopping sprees or crime. I just recently figured out that I never really got manic...just hypomanic. And a lot of my friends behave in such ways...but they don't have major depressions every year either. The depressive jags are sometimes the only way to figure this stuff out. I, too thought that my hypomania was just normal behavior. But in 3 years, I moved 5 (yeah that's right..5!) times around this city to find the place that was going to make me feel happy...drank like a fish--so much so that people would have to take me home...couldn't keep a job because I'd start coming up with agendas...(i switched jobs 4 times in 3 years) couldn't concentrate on my artwork because of all of my agendas...on message boards taunting people at work and writing "exposes".
>
> Arguably, this could be a result of just getting out of grad school and trying to settle. But the depressions (BAD ones...) kept returning.
>
> My doc put me on a tiny dose of zoloft and neurontin...my aunt is on this and seems well.
> We'll see.
>
> But I wanted to thank you guys for helping me to figure this shit out.
>
> Hang in there Brandy...Find a GOOD pdoc if you possibly can! It is worth the investment...it's your life!
>
> Thanks again guys.
>
>
> Thanks! I definetely going to try to find a pdoc instead of my general practitioner about this. Because, like you, I dont get the "major" manic episodes, and I never have. My mood is elevated, I do crazy stuff like quit my job , and I move all over just like you trying to find a place that makes me happy. But the depression gets awful, a lot worse than my "up" moods (I guess I mean hypomanic b/c I dont ever get fully manic). But thanks a lot for the reply, and I'm going to find a good doctor. By the way, what med's did they put you on for this? Thanks
Brandy

 

Re: double double quotes

Posted by Dr. Bob on November 9, 2002, at 1:29:21

In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » Brandymac26, posted by BarbaraCat on November 8, 2002, at 14:48:48

> Also the book 'Why your depression isn't getting better', by Dr. M. Bartos.

I'd just like to plug the new double double quotes feature:

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#amazon

But I don't mean to be pushy. Did you deliberately not use it to link to Amazon? If so, I'd be interested in why, over at PBA:

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020918/msgs/7717.html

Thanks!

Bob

 

Re: Me too, perhaps?

Posted by Lyn on November 9, 2002, at 3:58:49

In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » Brandymac26, posted by BarbaraCat on November 8, 2002, at 14:48:48

I've read this thread and a few other on bi-polar II, and it sounds sooo familiar.

I've suffered dreadful depression and crushing anxiety for years without finding any helpful treatment. Furthermore, I've been frustrated by a medical establishment that tells me how well I am feeling. Obviously if I can drag myself out of bed then that, to them, means I am feeling ok. However, if I can get up it's probably because I am really anxious. When I'm anxious I'm most likely to cut or burn myself or to attempt suicide. I get obnoxious and argumentative and sometimes violent - to the extent of breaking windows. When I feel really depressed I sleep most of the time; when I am anxious I barely sleep and, sometimes, not at all. It's when I don't sleep that I feel most energetic. I'm a great one for planning all sorts of projects - I've got boxes of material and wool and other craft items - but I never get round to doing anything. Either I get so depressed that I can't face anything or I am too overwhelmed or, at times, I simply can't settle to concentrate.

Concentration is a really big problem. I've been diagnosed with OCD and constantly have to count, over and over, in my mind. Sometimes the counting gets so loud that I can't hear anything else and I can't think any other thoughts at the same time. Makes it hell trying to read (I'm a university student) because I have to count the number of words on a line or even the amount of letters.

Sometimes I go on spending sprees or I binge eat. I make dreadful decisions or blurt out a statement and really regret it later. However, I don't associate any of this with mania, which I understand to be a feeling of being on top of the world. In the last eight years I have had three days which were ok (not great, just ok); the rest have been hell.

Most medications have made me feel worse; Prozac gave me migraines; aropax and nortryptilene together didn't help (I was depressed, got anxious and then depressed again); moclobemide made me very, very anxious but it wasn't until I got into one of my deep dark depressions again that they acknowledged that it wasn't helping; seroquel gave me freaky out-of-body experiences and worsened the PTSD symptoms; doxepin made me a zombie; olanzapine and aropax together made me gain over 40 kgs in less than six months, made me so agitated that they prescribed a second AP to try and control the agitation, my face broke out in boil-like eruptions, I couldn't think to save myself and couldn't move to get out of my own way - my friends said it was as if no one was home when they talked to me; an extremely low dose of seroquel also made me feel like a zombie. I've tried a few other ADs and APs that I can't recall the names of, as well as ECT, but nothing has helped.

Does this sound like BPII?

After suffering like this most of my life there may be some hope on the horizon: I have just been approved funding for a private clinic and will leave for there in a few weeks. Hopefully this time someone will listen, won't tell me I'm feeling better when I feel like utter c**p and no-one will tell me to have a nice cup of tea when I am so agitated that I want to break every item of furniture in sight. Maybe, just maybe, I will finally get the right diagnosis.

 

Re: double double quotes

Posted by fluffy on November 9, 2002, at 11:27:01

In reply to Re: double double quotes, posted by Dr. Bob on November 9, 2002, at 1:29:21

Hi Lyn--

I'm not the resident expert on such things. I can only tell you my experience so far. When I was taking antidepressants this past time, I felt like thrashing something, breaking things, hurting myself or had suicidal thoughts. It was like an urge...and I can pretty close to doing some of those things. Trying to explain these feelings to a friend is like telling them that you're some kind of alien from another planet. But they are real feelings! I felt so guilty for feeling these things (maybe my catholic/baptist upbringing here).
All this was really strange, you see, because I had taken antidepressants before and came out of a major depressive episode. So this time, I thought, should be the same, right? I ended up having such a nightmarish reaction.

It's hard to trust the doctors who are prescribing the meds when they seem to exacerbate the problems...I was pretty angry at my pdoc...But part of the problem was that I couldn't recognize the bad reaction..I wanted the AD's to work so badly, so I kept taking them, and kept getting worse. (I'm talking after a good 6 weeks on those suckers...)

Part of the problem is recognition. If any of this stuff makes sense to you, then be sure to tell your pdoc. And trust him/her even though it might be hard.

Good luck to you!
cuppa? I raise my glass to you!

 

Re: double double quotes

Posted by Lyn on November 9, 2002, at 15:18:35

In reply to Re: double double quotes, posted by fluffy on November 9, 2002, at 11:27:01

>When I was taking antidepressants this past time, I felt like thrashing something, breaking things, hurting myself or had suicidal thoughts. It was like an urge...and I can pretty close to doing some of those things. Trying to explain these feelings to a friend is like telling them that you're some kind of alien from another planet. But they are real feelings! I felt so guilty for feeling these things (maybe my catholic/baptist upbringing here).

Yes, exactly what I was feeling. But it is difficult to tell anyone how you feel, when you feel bad. Somehow words seem to escape me and I can say I feel lousy but not why. It is particularly difficult when doctors and nurses are telling me that I am feeling better and are determined not to take any notice of what I say. I spent six years or so being told I had major depression and that was all. More recently I have been given a lot of labels: OCD, Social Phobia, Agoraphobia, PTSD, Eating Disorder.... but that tells me that the earlier people just weren't willing to acknowledge any other possibilities and were determined to prove that they had cured me. This year my case worker decided that I had never been depressed at all and that I was merely anxious. Pdocs plus my own GP have said that there is nothing they can do to help and that I need to find my own cure. One doctor suggested I read self-help books such as Don't Sweat the Small Stuff. Thank goodness I finally found a counsellor who listened and got me assessed for the clinic I am being sent to.

> All this was really strange, you see, because I had taken antidepressants before and came out of a major depressive episode. So this time, I thought, should be the same, right? I ended up having such a nightmarish reaction.
>

I have felt like this much of my life but it was only eight years ago that I was diagnosed with depression (following the birth of my second child). But none of the antidepressants have helped.

> It's hard to trust the doctors who are prescribing the meds when they seem to exacerbate the problems...I was pretty angry at my pdoc...But part of the problem was that I couldn't recognize the bad reaction..I wanted the AD's to work so badly, so I kept taking them, and kept getting worse. (I'm talking after a good 6 weeks on those suckers...)
>

Yep, I can identify with this problem. I spent 18 months on the olanzapine/aropax combo even though I felt so lousy. I really did want to get well and they told me how well I was doing or, when I complained about feeling so bad told me that I had to give the meds time to work. After 18 months, even in the state I was in, I could tell that this combo was never going to help.

> Part of the problem is recognition. If any of this stuff makes sense to you, then be sure to tell your pdoc. And trust him/her even though it might be hard.
>

Trust is a major problem, more so than ever after my prolonged experience with the medical community. I just have to take on the fresh slate/starting over mentality when I go to the clinic.

> Good luck to you!
> cuppa? I raise my glass to you!
>

Thank you so much for your thoughts and experiences. This time **will** be different for me.

Best wishes,
Lyn

 

Re: Me too, perhaps?

Posted by catmint on November 9, 2002, at 21:46:49

In reply to Re: Me too, perhaps?, posted by Lyn on November 9, 2002, at 3:58:49

>When I'm anxious I'm most likely to cut or burn myself or to attempt suicide. I get obnoxious and argumentative and sometimes violent - to the extent of breaking windows

Lyn, many bipolar people have anxiety. I too have felt this way. Just tonight I was so agitated I wanted to break a mirror. I am also argumetative and hostile. Makes it extremely difficult to relationships.

>When I feel really depressed I sleep most of the time; when I am anxious I barely sleep and, sometimes, not at all. It's when I don't sleep that I feel most energetic.

Bipolar depression is experienced commonly as just that, wanting to sleep all the time and appetite changes. Conversely, when hypomanic, there is a need for less sleep and your mood is elated.

>Sometimes I go on spending sprees or I binge eat. I make dreadful decisions or blurt out a statement and really regret it later. However, I don't associate any of this with mania, which I understand to be a feeling of being on top of the world. In the last eight years I have had three days which were ok (not great, just ok); the rest have been hell.

Mania can be feel great but there is often a really uncomfortable edgy feeling along with it. It sounds like you experience mixed states which is mania and dpression at the same time. I'ts like you are depressed but have a lot of energy. Some psychiatrist believe that mania is really just a form of depression.

>Most medications have made me feel worse; Prozac gave me migraines; aropax and nortryptilene together didn't help (I was depressed, got anxious and then depressed again); moclobemide made me very, very anxious but it wasn't until I got into one of my deep dark depressions again that they acknowledged that it wasn't helping; seroquel gave me freaky out-of-body experiences and worsened the PTSD symptoms; doxepin made me a zombie; olanzapine and aropax together made me gain over 40 kgs in less than six months, made me so agitated that they prescribed a second AP to try and control the agitation, my face broke out in boil-like eruptions, I couldn't think to save myself and couldn't move to get out of my own way - my friends said it was as if no one was home when they talked to me; an extremely low dose of seroquel also made me feel like a zombie. I've tried a few other ADs and APs that I can't recall the names of, as well as ECT, but nothing has helped.

Have you ever been on a mood stabilizer? Even though olanzapine is approved bu the FDA as a "mood stabilizer" It really just makes people zombies. THe key treatment for BP is anti-seizure meds.

>Does this sound like BPII?

Lyn, It sounds like from what you described that you could very well be bipolar. I hope you get the care you need at the new clinic. I write down all my symptons so I don't forget. Keep us posted.

Amy

 

Re: Me too, perhaps?

Posted by Lyn on November 11, 2002, at 4:49:25

In reply to Re: Me too, perhaps?, posted by catmint on November 9, 2002, at 21:46:49


> Have you ever been on a mood stabilizer? Even though olanzapine is approved bu the FDA as a "mood stabilizer" It really just makes people zombies. THe key treatment for BP is anti-seizure meds.
>

I don't think I have ever been prescribed a mood stabiliser. I'm not even sure why I was given Olanzapine; they said it would make the suicidal thoughts go away, but before long the suicidal thoughts were just bouncing around in my head unencumbered by any other thoughts. The anxiety and agitation caused by this med was unbearable and I was given stellazine to try and counteract that. That didn't seem to help, either.

>
> Lyn, It sounds like from what you described that you could very well be bipolar. I hope you get the care you need at the new clinic. I write down all my symptons so I don't forget. Keep us posted.
>
> Amy

Thanks for your kind reply. I hope that this clinic will work, too.

Best wishes,
Lyn

 

Bipolar dx confirmed

Posted by amy_oz on November 11, 2002, at 22:18:21

In reply to Re: Me too, perhaps?, posted by Lyn on November 11, 2002, at 4:49:25

Hi,
I had my first appointment with my pdoc this afternoon. She was very kind. She agrees with me that I am bipolar and have just come out of a nasty mixed state. She thanked me for doing all the research on it cause it makes her job easier when she is talking to an informed person (so thats a thanks to you guys as well!).

So, I am to come off the Paxil and after a physical will decide a new course of meds. She is thinking minimum dose Lamactal + Depakote....I know that these meds aren't normally combined. At what strength do they become a problem?

Thanks for your support through this

Cheers,
Amy

 

Counting BarbaraCat

Posted by Ponder on November 12, 2002, at 14:47:32

In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » Brandymac26, posted by BarbaraCat on November 8, 2002, at 14:48:48

Just wanted to say that when I count my blessings, I include BarbaraCat among them. The insightful, articulate posts and helpful links she provides are a godsend.

 

Re: Bipolar dx confirmed » amy_oz

Posted by BarbaraCat on November 12, 2002, at 22:49:03

In reply to Bipolar dx confirmed, posted by amy_oz on November 11, 2002, at 22:18:21

Wonderful news, Amy! If Lamictal and depakote don't work, you might want to try Lamictal and lithium. Good old lithium, never thought I'd be happy to be taking it.

> Hi,
> I had my first appointment with my pdoc this afternoon. She was very kind. She agrees with me that I am bipolar and have just come out of a nasty mixed state. She thanked me for doing all the research on it cause it makes her job easier when she is talking to an informed person (so thats a thanks to you guys as well!).
>
> So, I am to come off the Paxil and after a physical will decide a new course of meds. She is thinking minimum dose Lamactal + Depakote....I know that these meds aren't normally combined. At what strength do they become a problem?
>
> Thanks for your support through this
>
> Cheers,
> Amy

 

Ponder, bless your heart! (nm) » Ponder

Posted by BarbaraCat on November 12, 2002, at 22:50:47

In reply to Counting BarbaraCat, posted by Ponder on November 12, 2002, at 14:47:32


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