Posted by Brandymac26 on November 8, 2002, at 8:30:31
In reply to Re: ideas for poss Bipolar...not sure what type » amy_oz, posted by BarbaraCat on November 7, 2002, at 2:48:07
I would like to know if you could give me some website links that go in detail about bipolar disorder. I am really starting to think that I may be bipolar, and have been told by numerous people that I definetley could be. The thread "need help w/ diagnosis" explains some of my symptoms. The reason I'm having such a hard time finding info is b/c most sites I've been to expalain Bipolar1, and that doesnt really fit me. I have really bad depression, get into mixed states (both of the criteria for these states fit me), but the manis phase is what s throwing me off. I dont go without sleep, or become real creative, and want to go, go, go, all the time. I get real irritable, panicky, and sometime make decisions that arent the best in the world. Like I will decide I'm gonna quit my job and go back to school full time. Of course a couple of weeks down the road I realize I was an idiot for doing this, b/c I need the monsy, and I get depressed, quit school, and then end up in a mixed state with wierd episodes of feeling like people are watching me in the shower, or the worl is ending, or that I have some terrible disease and every time the phon erings its my doc calling to report bad news.
What is confusing is that I've never been suicidal, when i get depressed all I want to do is sleep b/c I'm exhausted, and I dont want anyone or anything to bother me. On the other hand, I never really get fully manic either. Now, as a teenager, and into my early 20's, I fit the manic profile to a "T". Nothing that I felt coincided with what was going on in my life, i always wanted to go out and party, stay up all night, made really stupid decisions and wondered later why I did what I did. But now, i dont ever get that bad. I just get really panicky, irritated, make bad decisions etc. Does this fit into any bipolar spectrums? Every website I have been to says that you really have to be manic, and I almost have a hard time understanding what that is b/c even as a teenager, I thought my behavior was part of my personality. I am on lexapro(10mg's), and it's helped a little w/ my anxiety, but not really done anything for the depression. I'm at a loss here. I dont know whats wrong with me. Thanks
Brandy
poster:Brandymac26
thread:126351
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20021108/msgs/126942.html