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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by Partlycloudy on July 23, 2008, at 17:10:55
In reply to Re: Called the placement agency » Partlycloudy, posted by TexasChic on July 23, 2008, at 16:29:56
> > Great to see you going forward - these aren't baby steps at all, but leaps and bounds.
>
> Do you really think so? I've been feeling guilty about sitting around all day. I felt like those two phone calls were the least I could do. I've been trying to psych myself up to do something more, but I really don't feel up to it.
>Well, sweetie - your doctor gave you those days off for a reason, because you needed them. They weren't expressly for you to be doing a job search. You're under some severe stress right now. He recognized that.
> >I'm glad the medication is doing its job; that's what it's there for.
>
> Me too, maybe it will help me strengthen my invisible Super-Toxic-People-Shield when I go back in next week. I'm still working on the name.
>
> -TSounds like a super power I could use, too!
Posted by TexasChic on July 23, 2008, at 21:17:05
In reply to Re: Called the placement agency » TexasChic, posted by Partlycloudy on July 23, 2008, at 17:10:55
You're right. I guess I feel like I like I'm playing hooky or something though. I am trying to push that negative thought away though and just relax.
-T
Posted by Kath on July 24, 2008, at 18:20:04
In reply to Re: Called the placement agency » Partlycloudy, posted by TexasChic on July 23, 2008, at 21:17:05
A medical health-care-professional was of the opinion that you needed time off.
Plain & simple. You're under a tremendous amount of stress; were under what I see as a personal attack, of sorts.
Puleeeez pamper & nurture yourself. You definitely deserve it. If you're able to make a few calls, etc, that's great. Otherwise, let your meds kick in (which it sounds like they're doing) & take loving care of yourself.
You don't need to prove anything to anyone - or BE anyone to anyone (even yourself). Just try to be loving to yourself, okay?
xoxox ((((((((((((((((((you)))))))))))))) Kath
Posted by TexasChic on July 24, 2008, at 19:36:47
In reply to You're not playing hookie.... » TexasChic, posted by Kath on July 24, 2008, at 18:20:04
Thanks Kath. You know, its funny, on my regular days off I lay around and don't have the energy to do anything. But with this extended time off, I've actually begun to relax, and I find myself wanting to do things like get the laundry done or organize my closet. And just because I want to! Weird huh?
-T
Posted by Kath on July 24, 2008, at 20:17:52
In reply to Re: You're not playing hookie.... » Kath, posted by TexasChic on July 24, 2008, at 19:36:47
> Thanks Kath. You know, its funny, on my regular days off I lay around and don't have the energy to do anything. But with this extended time off, I've actually begun to relax, and I find myself wanting to do things like get the laundry done or organize my closet. And just because I want to! Weird huh?
>
> -T*****Actually, I don't think it's weird because you have regular stresses lifted off your shoulders. You're FREEEEEE for a bit! I think I can understand that you'd feel like doing things.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxooxxo Kath
Posted by TexasChic on July 25, 2008, at 20:00:42
In reply to Re: You're not playing hookie.... » TexasChic, posted by Kath on July 24, 2008, at 20:17:52
Well, first of all between trying to hook up my printer to my computer, and trying to hook up my DVD player to my TV (my cable and internet are together) I managed to screw up my internet. After fiddling around for longer than I'd like to admit, I finally got up and going, but its not the same browser I'm used to so its irritating.
Now that I've whined, I actually had some good things today. First of all, I went to the interview at that placement agency. It went well, but they didn't have any jobs that fit me at the moment. Its one of those things that's not something you would solely depend on to get a job, but its one more thing working for you, and every little bit helps.
The second thing is, weeks ago this guy called me about a managerial job. I didn't think it sounded like something I could possibly be qualified for, so I held off calling a few days. Then when I did call I never heard back from him. Well today he called and wants me to interview Monday or Tuesday! He apologized for not getting back to me for so long, but said they are still looking for someone if I'm interested. So we'll see how it goes!
Oh yeah, I called the lady from the University job and her voicemail said she was out until Tuesday, so that may be why I haven't heard anything yet. Keep your fingers crossed!!!
-T
Posted by Phillipa on July 25, 2008, at 20:34:43
In reply to Couple of updates..., posted by TexasChic on July 25, 2008, at 20:00:42
T hey that sounds great fingers and toes crossed for you. Phillipa
Posted by TexasChic on July 25, 2008, at 20:57:43
In reply to Couple of updates..., posted by TexasChic on July 25, 2008, at 20:00:42
Thanks Phillipa. It the waiting and uncertainty that gets to me. I'll be glad when all this over and done with!
Posted by Partlycloudy on July 26, 2008, at 8:11:55
In reply to Couple of updates..., posted by TexasChic on July 25, 2008, at 20:00:42
That's all very encouraging news, TC. Everything happens for a reason in my book, even though at the time it's not clear to us. I think you'll come out a winner on this one.
Partlycloudy
Posted by TexasChic on July 26, 2008, at 19:11:29
In reply to Re: Couple of updates... » TexasChic, posted by Partlycloudy on July 26, 2008, at 8:11:55
Thanks PC! (I like being able to call you that again).
>That's all very encouraging news, TC. Everything happens for a reason in my book, even though at the time it's not clear to us.
I'm a firm believer in that too, its just difficult to keep it in mind all the time. Besides, I think I've had enough bad things happening for a reason that for once I deserve some good things happening for a reason!
Well, I can't really say that because its actually all in how you look at things. Last Saturday I went to Crispy Cream and bought a box of donuts, coffee, and chocolate milk. I had just brought my wallet inside to make carrying out easier. So I go to open the door and the donut box crushes, threatening to spill all the donuts, and by way of saving them I spilled coffee all over myself. I was so pissed. I got to my car, put the coffee, wallet and chocolate milk on the top of the car, and the donuts on the ground. I got out my keys, opened the door, put the donuts in, and then reached up and grabbed the coffee and chocolate milk and was on my way.
About three hours later I wake up from a nap and on my voice mail there is a message from Crispy Cream saying they think they have something of mine. I immediately knew what it was. I had left my wallet on top of the car.
So I drove down there, cursing my self the whole time for not asking her if there was anything left in it. And when I finally arrive she gives it to me fully intact, saying an employee found it in the parking lot. Some of the stuff was moved around, from her searching it to try to find a way to contact me. She said she finally found my phone number on an old receipt I had from the vet.
I was like, "OMG, I'm such an idiot, you just don't know the week I've had, and blah blah blah". She had been completely expressionless up to this point, but then she smiled and said sometimes these things just happen. I left there thinking, this is a good sign. It could have gone bad, it SHOULD have gone bad, but it didn't. So I guess good things have happened to me for a reason!
-T
Posted by TexasChic on July 28, 2008, at 20:11:51
In reply to Re: Couple of updates... » Partlycloudy, posted by TexasChic on July 26, 2008, at 19:11:29
I went to work today - while not exactly ecstatic - but in a pretty good mood. My days off and the things I accomplished around the house made me feel like a new person. That was soon to change.
Never once, all day, did my boss or coworker ask how I was or if I was feeling better. Everyone else did, but not my closest coworkers.
I went to my boss and asked what she wanted me to start working on. She said she was writing it up in an email for me. Turns out this email included all of the projects that went unfinished last week, as well as all the ones for this week, all crammed together.
I worked on the first task as diligently as possible, but had a bit of trouble in the last few minutes (this was a new task for me that is one of many being giving to me when I'm apparently doing so abismally in my other work). She informed me I had turned it in 10 minutes late and that is NOT meeting the deadline.
For the rest of the day I worked and worked and worked and worked. After 9 hours I was worn out and could no longer type or think straight. She finally came up to me and said she realized I would be there until midnight finishing all that, so to make up a schedule of how I thought I could complete the work within the next two days. I did my best, then she was kind of snooty about my leaving at 6PM and said, "well, its your choice". After that, she left and I just sat there and cried and cried and cried. No one else was there to hear me.
I think what upset me most was that I called the guy about managerial job. We discussed trying to schedule an interview around my crazy hours, and he said he would call me back. The only bad thing about this is while talking to him I realized I REALLY am not qualified for the job. I'm not being modest or negative or anything, I just really don't know how to do all that stuff! So if he calls back, I'm going to tell him I was afraid I mislead him to think I had more experience than I actually do, but if he is looking for somebody who picks up things quickly and has a vast knowledge of different areas of graphic design, then I'm the one for him. But if he wants someone who's going to just jump right in and start running things, I can't honestly say I could do that. I mean, this is stuff like running printing presses and image setters and just all kinds of crap I wouldn't have a clue how to handle. But I will make sure to impress upon him that if he wants someone hardworking, diligent, reliable, and won't quit no matter what, then give me a shot.
And now we wait.
-T
Posted by Phillipa on July 28, 2008, at 20:18:11
In reply to Today, posted by TexasChic on July 28, 2008, at 20:11:51
T your boss is horrible and seems to have no feelings at all. I'm so sorry for you. And the other position wouldn't there be an orientation period where you would learn the necessary skills? Love Phillipa
Posted by TexasChic on July 28, 2008, at 20:34:23
In reply to Re: Today » TexasChic, posted by Phillipa on July 28, 2008, at 20:18:11
Thanks so much for the support.
There may be an orientation period for that other job, that's pretty much what I'm going to ask him: if he's willing to take the chance of training somebody who may or may not pay off, or if he'd rather just skip it. And honestly, if I have no chance, arranging an interview with my schedule is very difficult, so I don't want to do it if its useless. Now there are other things in my field that I don't know but I at least understand, and would probably give those a shot. But I'm afraid this job is more machinery and managing. But I'll keep trying.
-T
Posted by Kath on July 28, 2008, at 20:58:29
In reply to Today, posted by TexasChic on July 28, 2008, at 20:11:51
Dear, dear TC,
I canNOT believe how much your boss SUCKS. Oh BOY - I could use some absolutely CHOICE language & would love to say it to her face. And I'm serious!.
Gawd TC - if only you can get another job. I would love to see you out of there.
>So if he calls back, I'm going to tell him I was afraid I mislead him to think I had more experience than I actually do,
********Please be careful how you word it. There are positive ways! don't say you mislead him hun. You can say that you are so interested in working there that...hm....well, that you - i'm not sure! But try to put a positive spin on it! I know - so interested in working there, that you were totally willing to learn whatever you needed to, & then on giving it further thought, you realized that in certain areas, they would need someone to jump in & take over (whatever you said in your post...) All the other stuff you said sounded good.Keep us 'posted' & please try to put on a HARD SKIN...realizing that your boss is at best a very mean, cruel, troubled person & that your co-worker knows this & is probably trying to cover her *** & keep in boss's good books - NOT nice, but probably true.
Please try to know in your mind that you do NOT respect them & that you are being treated abominably.
I send you BIG cyberhugs,
much love, Kath
but if he is looking for somebody who picks up things quickly and has a vast knowledge of different areas of graphic design, then I'm the one for him. But if he wants someone who's going to just jump right in and start running things, I can't honestly say I could do that. I mean, this is stuff like running printing presses and image setters and just all kinds of crap I wouldn't have a clue how to handle. But I will make sure to impress upon him that if he wants someone hardworking, diligent, reliable, and won't quit no matter what, then give me a shot.
>
> And now we wait.
>
> -T
Posted by Partlycloudy on July 29, 2008, at 7:15:48
In reply to Today, posted by TexasChic on July 28, 2008, at 20:11:51
TC, it sounds like your boss is trying to make your job very quickly unmanageable for you. Perhaps you could forward the email to the HR weenie (if they haven't been cc'd already) so they're made aware of the scheduling you're being subjected to.
Hang in there.
PC
Posted by Kath on July 29, 2008, at 8:38:55
In reply to Re: Today » TexasChic, posted by Partlycloudy on July 29, 2008, at 7:15:48
> TC, it sounds like your boss is trying to make your job very quickly unmanageable for you. Perhaps you could forward the email to the HR weenie (if they haven't been cc'd already) so they're made aware of the scheduling you're being subjected to.
>
> Hang in there.
>
> PC*****Excellent idea. Also to include the comment about the 10 minutes late & boss's comment!!!!!
luv, Kath
Posted by Kath on July 29, 2008, at 21:03:36
In reply to Re: Today » Phillipa, posted by TexasChic on July 28, 2008, at 20:34:23
Want you to know you're in my thoughts.
luv, Kath
Posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 21:41:22
In reply to Hey you - how are ya doing? » TexasChic, posted by Kath on July 29, 2008, at 21:03:36
Thanks Kath, I helps to know there's someone out there pulling for me.
When I came back to work monday, my boss made out a schedule of deadlines for this week that included both last week's work as well as this week's. I worked 9 hours Monday and 7AM-8PM today. Of course I did not finish what I was supposed to by the end of the day. When I was leaving at 8, she proceeded to tell me she wouldn't stop me from leaving, but I just better know I haven't made a deadline yet [since she wrote me up]. I told her I was out an entire week last week. She said she didn't care about last week this was deadlines for this week. I said but they are all the same deadlines! Its just that last week I had a week to finish a project, while this week I had a day!
The thing about it is, our department has deadlines of when things go to the printer or have to be posted online, and these are not the deadlines she's referring to. She's talking about these micromanaged schedules that she makes out that are impossible to meet.
She said all this in front of a guy I work with too. I finally just said, okay, I'm going.
I called a coworker who had given me her home phone number because she was concerned about me and said she had seen my boss watching us at work when we talk. She's very supportive and says its obvious my boss is trying to set me up. I feel bad because all I ever do is vent to her.
So I came home and I called the phone number you're supposed to call when you think something unethical is going on at work. I had called before and got a list of therapists, and I had contacted them by email also to explain the situation with my boss. Today I just added to everything that has happened and said I don't even know if I can make myself go to work tomorrow. I just don't know if I can do it! It was hell just making myself stay there all day! I'm actually beginning to wonder now that even if I did get another job, would I be able to do it?! I feel like a basket case.
I'm sorry, that's all I can write for now. I'll check back in though.
-T
Posted by Kath on July 29, 2008, at 22:05:08
In reply to Worst day yet » Kath, posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 21:41:22
Oh Sweetie,
It is so unbelievably disgusting!
I'm sure you hardly even get a chance to go to the bathroom, what with trying to get everything done, but are you able to be keeping track, etc to let HR know? Or even to make an email by "cut & pasting" what you write here (& obviously editing it!!! LOL)
I think it would be VERY good to let HR know what she'd now in the process of doing.
I'm glad you were able to speak to that co-worker. I'd let her know that you appreciate her support & I dunno - just something about that you are sorry if it feels very 1-sided with you venting, etc.
Remember all those anger-venting methods I told ya.
I went to an appointment today with a doctor who does some pretty off-the-wall alternative type stuff. One of the things I worked on (amounts to sitting & letting thoughts come in while holding certain energy points) & I was working on "I don't have any control" YOUR situation came up - & nope I don't have ANY control over it & BOY do I wish I did!!!!
((((((((you)))))))))
luv, Kath
PS - when this job is history, I think you might feel SUCH a sense of relief hun. I think you're going to be okay.
Posted by Larry Hoover on July 29, 2008, at 22:27:47
In reply to Worst day yet » Kath, posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 21:41:22
Posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 22:33:35
In reply to Re: Worst day yet » TexasChic, posted by Kath on July 29, 2008, at 22:05:08
For some reason it just made me laugh to think of you thinking of me like that, I don't know why.
I guess I need to get it through my head that I AM in control of what happens next. Maybe not in what other people do, but how I handle it and where I go from there.
I think I am going to try to pursue the extended time off thing with a doctor's note that the HR lady sent me paper work on. My doc thinks they may fire me because of it, but hey, who's to say they aren't going to fire me tomorrow. Or if they don't, that I don't go totally postal before then!
-T
Posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 22:35:25
In reply to {{{{{{{{TC}}}}}}}} (nm) » TexasChic, posted by Larry Hoover on July 29, 2008, at 22:27:47
Posted by Kath on July 30, 2008, at 11:28:45
In reply to Re: Worst day yet » Kath, posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 22:33:35
:-))
How long of exended time off could you get, do you think?
I'm wondering if it'd be legal for them to fire you either:
- for taking extended medical leave
or
- while you're ON extended medical leaveI also wonder how long the doctor would give you leave for?
Also, would you be in a bad situation if you got fired & hadn't got a job yet?
Just thoughts.
luv ya, Kath
Posted by Kath on July 30, 2008, at 11:31:04
In reply to Re: Worst day yet » Kath, posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 22:33:35
pretty clear to me!!!
I think she's definitely going ALL OUT to build a case to fire you on the grounds (ridiculous though they are) that you're incompetent.
What is your take on that lately?
xoxo Kath
Posted by TexasChic on July 30, 2008, at 19:23:50
In reply to PS - your boss's intentions seem » TexasChic, posted by Kath on July 30, 2008, at 11:31:04
I was hoping for a couple of weeks, but my doctor said I needed at least a month off! Its still not officially approved, but I was told by my doctor and the claims rep that I should call in tomorrow and tell my supervisor I won't be coming in and that I have filed an illness recover claim. Oh, and I also made sure with HR that this would not get me fired. She said my job would still be available when I got back.
-T
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