![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by jay on November 17, 2003, at 3:32:26
Actually I have been "thinking" about this for years, but now I realize I *gotta* do it. An informal one..no "shrinks" or other "professionals". Once a week...and it's just us depressive and bipolar folks. No formal *CBT* (yay!!!)..just lettin' out what ill's us this week. Man..I will *actually* interact with people!! I haven't done that in...well..not in an informal way, in years! Seriously..I have no friends anymore, and just go and hang out with my brother and his family once in awhile.
So...please..please...*please* pester me to do this. :-) I've lived in this "shell" for almost 6-7 years, and damn....the worst thing about this disease...is it is *so lonely*. :( It is truly soul-breaking...heart-breaking, and I feel like I've lost too many years already to this illness.
I am also a good and nice person, and I think I can really help others too. It's not just selfish.
People like me...who think they are "too weird" to fit in...too 'crazy'...too 'shy'...too 'ugly'...too 'fat'...too 'scrawny'.I spend my days sleeping, then read for a bit, sleep, shower, eat, sleep...over and over and over. I used to be the guy who liked to go shopping, get a nice set of designer clothes, some special very expensive cologne. I know I can get some of that back....but what is most important is to feel good about myself and others..with no or little conditions.
Hmmmm...what do you folks think? (Besides me being Mr.-all-time-loser(err..loner..heh.)
Jay
Posted by Dinah on November 17, 2003, at 7:08:58
In reply to Thinking of going to local support group..., posted by jay on November 17, 2003, at 3:32:26
Jay, I think it's a great idea. I'd do it myself only there aren't any in my area, and believe me - I've called.
Taking those steps out into the world is so important and difficult. Having a group to support you along the way will really help.
Now. Git! Git! Go call around and find meeting times and places.
And don't get discouraged if the first one you go to isn't a good fit. It isn't really true that there are none in my area. There are a few local chapters of national groups. They just weren't a good fit for *me*.
Posted by justyourlaugh on November 17, 2003, at 7:18:33
In reply to Thinking of going to local support group..., posted by jay on November 17, 2003, at 3:32:26
you are 100% correct..
you will feel better once you commit to a weekly group...
very important to remember to be true to yourself...you have to drag yourself there on the "offdays" even if its for the benifit of the others..
you can do this..you need to do this..
i wish you a warm welcome
confidence
and a solemate on your rightside
j
Posted by fallsfall on November 17, 2003, at 7:37:28
In reply to Thinking of going to local support group..., posted by jay on November 17, 2003, at 3:32:26
I've been going to a support group for over a year now. What strikes me is how helpful it is to find someone who shares an issue that you have. You find people who honestly understand. And sometimes there are people who have been in your shoes and can suggest good and bad paths to follow. You can find out which pdocs and therapists in the are are good. You can find out which hospitals are the best. And you can share your experiences and empathy with other people and see that you have made a difference in their life. That is powerful medicine.
Please go.
Posted by Searchlight on November 17, 2003, at 15:33:31
In reply to Thinking of going to local support group..., posted by jay on November 17, 2003, at 3:32:26
Jay, I think you are bang on. I have some similarities to you. When my atypical depression (called BP2 in some therapists' opinion) gets bad, I either retreat into myself or (in the past) did some things that were not psychologically very healthy. I live in a city of a million plus, and we have a few national support groups here (the branches for this city) like DBSA or NAMI. Unfortunantly I went to a few of the meetings, and they just didn't "fit" with me even though I found the people there to very nice. I wish I had someplace to go where I felt comfortable and able to feel supported. I urge you to try a support group and see how it works for you. Everyone is different, and I hope you can find one that "fits" you. In the days when insurance paid for such things, I went to a lot of group therapy and it helped a lot! I miss that!
And Jay, I also miss the days when I was more vivacious and got dressed up and socialized and dated more. I miss things about happier times (they came in blocks for certain durations) when I felt more confident, attractive and whole. A support group would be a source of social (yes social, nothing wrong with that) and psychological support. Go for it! Best Wishes!
Posted by jay on November 17, 2003, at 16:43:23
In reply to Re: Thinking of going to local support group... » jay, posted by Dinah on November 17, 2003, at 7:08:58
Thanks so much Dinah...and I am git, git...gittin goin for the meeting next Thursday. (Not this one coming up....) Which kinda bums me...as they only have one meeting a month in the town I live in. But..half an hour away, I can get twice a month, so I guess I can pick and choose as to what I "fit" in. One of the first things that pops into my head..."..what if someone is there that I know?". But, who cares, because that *is* the point, to break the stigma and all that. Anyyyyhow...thanx so kindly again!
Best,
Jay
Posted by jay on November 17, 2003, at 16:50:18
In reply to Re: Thinking of going to local support group... » jay, posted by justyourlaugh on November 17, 2003, at 7:18:33
Ahhhh jyl...thank you soooo kindly. Sadly I may not get *weekly*, but close to it, as I am such a sad sod just mopping around in this kinda weird slightly med-induced haze. It's been another *bumpy* week...but I survived! If that is so great...well...ya, maybe...heh. My "soulmate" right now would be someone who is kinda, well, very, melencholic, reflective, yet both hopeful and dreadful. Errrg. Anywayss...how is your meetings going along? How is *everything* for that matter?
Ya let me know now..ya hear!..heh...
Peace and best,
Jay
Posted by jay on November 17, 2003, at 16:55:07
In reply to Re: Thinking of going to local support group... » jay, posted by fallsfall on November 17, 2003, at 7:37:28
Thanks so kindly for that excellent advice. Really, the practical things are just helpful in themselves, like sharing info on pdocs. THere are such a *wide* variety...some who patronize us and let us have *nil* say in our treatment...others who enlighten us by taking chances, trying new things, new meds...etc. I had one pdoc tell me I should consider ECT, and there are still many good drugs for me to try! It's like he wrote me off or something. Ugghh.
Anyhow..thank you...that is a super booster to get me going.
Best,
Jay
Posted by jay on November 17, 2003, at 17:03:41
In reply to Re: Thinking of going to local support group... » jay, posted by Searchlight on November 17, 2003, at 15:33:31
Thanks so much...your story just makes me more motivated to seek out this stuff. I am also sorry you had to go through so much s*it as well. Longing for that 'past self' who seemed so confident...but you are right, it did only come in "blocks" of time. I can still see myself doing that this day in age, but it's just the *desire*...but 'tis takes time as well.
I am also a bit in the same boat, as I may have to travel a bit to get to regular support group meetings, as my local group only meets once a month, and it sounds more like an "educational" thing than a 'talking & sharing' type of group. I want the later...in fact I need it, to help 'plug' me back into the "land of the living and loving".
Thanks so much again...
Best and hope to ya,
Jay
Posted by ratgrrl on November 18, 2003, at 20:37:38
In reply to Thinking of going to local support group..., posted by jay on November 17, 2003, at 3:32:26
I've been going to a weekly meeting of a DBSA group for about 2 months, although I haven't made it every week. I've met some excellent people and some folks I think will turn into actual friends. The group I go to is VERY large (like 100 ppl a week) but breaks up into much smaller (8-15) groups for chatting. Really, I used to think that kind of thing would be awful, but its been a big help.
So go!
ratgrrl
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.