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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 12 of 12. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Phil on May 14, 2002, at 19:14:36
"When I die, I want to die like my grandfather, who died
peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.""Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support
group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar."
--Drew Carey"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I
don't like and just give her a house,"
--Lewis Grizzard"The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a
desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun
with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at somebody elses house.
Jeff Foxworthy"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis,
and only enough blood to run one at a time."
--Robin Williams"If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving
an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without
even considering if there is a man on base."
--Dave Barry"What do people mean when they say the computer went down on them?"
--Marilyn Pittman"Relationships are hard. It's like a full time job, and we should
treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you,
they should give you two weeks' notice. There should be severance pay,
and before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp."
--Bob Ettinger"My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out
in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't
trying to teach you how to swim."
--Paula Poundstone"A study in the Washington Post says that women have better
verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that
study: "Duh."
--Conan O'Brien"Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway
through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God.... I could be eating
a slow learner."
--Lynda Montgomery"If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the
impersonators would be dead."
--Johnny Carson"My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned
sixty, and that's the law."
--Jerry Seinfeld"Remember in elementary school, you were told that in case of
fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest
to tallest. What is the logic in that? What, do tall people burn
slower?"
--Warren Hutcherson"Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the
same."
-Oscar Wilde"Suppose you were an idiot . . . . And suppose you were a member
of Congress . . . . But I repeat myself."
--Mark Twain"Ah, yes, divorce......., from the Latin word meaning to rip out
a man's genitals through his wallet."
--Robin Williams"Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it
as the only time of the month that I can be myself."
--Roseanne
"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."
--Billy Crystal"You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give
you a look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've thought
of that!'"
--Dave Barry
Posted by SandraDee on May 14, 2002, at 19:42:08
In reply to Wisdom..., posted by Phil on May 14, 2002, at 19:14:36
Posted by paxvox on May 14, 2002, at 19:59:47
In reply to Wisdom..., posted by Phil on May 14, 2002, at 19:14:36
Very nice, Phil! Laughter is, perhaps, the best medicine after all.
PAX
Posted by Mair on May 14, 2002, at 21:32:24
In reply to Re: Wisdom... » Phil, posted by paxvox on May 14, 2002, at 19:59:47
Phil - what a pleasant thing to hear myself laughing to myself - thanks
Mair
PS: I've always thought Dave Barry was a scream
Posted by Ritch on May 14, 2002, at 22:40:43
In reply to Wisdom..., posted by Phil on May 14, 2002, at 19:14:36
Posted by Analine on May 15, 2002, at 1:22:05
In reply to Wisdom..., posted by Phil on May 14, 2002, at 19:14:36
Thanks for those!!! Its to nice to read somthing funny once in a while :D
Posted by krazy kat on May 15, 2002, at 9:32:55
In reply to Re: Wisdom..., posted by Analine on May 15, 2002, at 1:22:05
"How do you feel about women's rights?
I like either side of them.""I sent the club a wire stating, 'Please accept my resignation. I don't want to belong to any club that will accept me as a member.'"
(How appropo to this site as of late. :))"A man's only as old as the woman he feels."
(Is that one BAD, or what?)And I could go on and on...
http://www.celebriducks.com/groucho_marx/
Posted by krazy kat on May 15, 2002, at 9:33:33
In reply to Wisdom..., posted by Phil on May 14, 2002, at 19:14:36
Posted by Cam W. on May 15, 2002, at 17:10:18
In reply to Wisdom..., posted by Phil on May 14, 2002, at 19:14:36
"We can be knowledgeable with other men's knowledge, but we cannot be wise with other men's wisdom." - Michel de Montaigne
"Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened." - Winston Churchill
"A thing is not necessarily true just because someone dies for it." - Oscar Wilde
"Many people would rather die than think. In fact, they do." - Bertrand Russell
"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." - Philip K. Dick
"Too much doubt is better than too much credulity." - Robert G. Ingersoll
"The value of an idea has nothing whatsoever to do with the sincerity of the man who expresses it." - Oscar Wilde
"Practically perfect people never permit sentiment to muddle their thinking." - Mary Poppins
"Life results from the non-random survival of randomly varying replicators. It is grindingly, creakingly, crashingly obvious that if Darwinism was really a theory of chance, it could not work." - Richard Dawkins
" ...[People say] Western medicine doesn't work; I'm sorry, we cured polio. What more do you want? Your herbalism has done jack; we cured polio. And guess what? It cures polio even if you don't believe in it." - Penn Jillette
"The fundamental cause of trouble in the world today is that the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt." Bertrand Russell
"Do not attribute to malice what can adequately be explained by stupidity." - H.L. Mencken
"There are some people that if they don't know, you can't tell 'em." - Louie Armstrong
"There is nothing so passionate as a vested interest disguised as an intellectual conviction." - Sean O'Casey
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." - Albert Einstein
"Desire for approval and recognition is a healthy motive, but the desire to be acknowledged as better, stronger, or more intelligent than a fellow being or fellow scholar easily leads to an excessively egoistic psychological adjustment, which may become injurious for the individual and for the community." - Albert Einstein
Posted by Alii on May 15, 2002, at 17:18:31
In reply to Re: Wisdom..., posted by Cam W. on May 15, 2002, at 17:10:18
Posted by Ritch on May 16, 2002, at 0:07:45
In reply to Re: Wisdom..., posted by Cam W. on May 15, 2002, at 17:10:18
Posted by Zo on May 16, 2002, at 5:47:42
In reply to Re: Wisdom..., posted by Cam W. on May 15, 2002, at 17:10:18
This is the end of the thread.
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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