Psycho-Babble Social Thread 15745

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Anger as on/off switch to mania

Posted by crinn on December 18, 2001, at 11:54:29

My doc is trying to decide if I'm "just" clinically depressed or manic-depressive. Not sure if (when not depressed) highly energetic and optimistic qualifies as mania. But I had a really weird thing happen today, that I wanted to see if anyone else has experienced. I'm in the midst of a very bleak depressive episode, with no relief from any of my meds. Last night, my husband broke a promise which meant a good deal to me. I was angry all night, didn't sleep (which is typical of my depressions) woke up this morning feeling draggy, but got to work and then--WOW! I haven't had this much energy in months. I got done in a morning more than I've been able to do in the past month--no exaggeration. I'm still pretty mad at my husband, and was wondering if this had anything to do with this energy burst. I don't know how long it will last, but I'm enjoying every minute of it. Not looking forward to the inevitable crash,though. Anyway, anyone else out there experience this?

 

Re: Anger as on/off switch to mania

Posted by mgrueni on December 18, 2001, at 17:09:31

In reply to Anger as on/off switch to mania, posted by crinn on December 18, 2001, at 11:54:29

< I was angry all night, didn't sleep (which is typical of my depressions) woke up this morning feeling draggy, but got to work and then--WOW! I haven't had this much energy in months.
Anyway, anyone else out there experience this? >

Yes. I do.
I even came to *use* this mechanism when I was very down but knew that I had to appear at work the next day. I didn`t sleep on purpose - to provoke a boost in energy. And you are right, the crash is inevitable and I usually feel even worse afterwards. I am not quite sure why, but not sleeping seems to have a paradox effect on me. Instead of making me drowsy and unmotivated it works like a stimulant for me. But only for 8 - 9 hours. And then the crash comes.
I donīt do that any more because I realised that I harm myself just to be functional at work for a few hours. And that`s not worth it. I think your anger has been a trigger as well. Anger makes our body ready for a *fight* - we mobilize all our *spare energy*. I am not surprised that the combination of both, staying awake almost the whole night plus this anger made you *overactive*.


Micha

 

Re: Anger as on/off switch to mania

Posted by crinn on December 19, 2001, at 7:37:02

In reply to Re: Anger as on/off switch to mania, posted by mgrueni on December 18, 2001, at 17:09:31

Thanks so much, Micha. And you're right. Now it is day 2, the anger has abated, and with it the energy. I hate to admit it, but it was exhilarating while it lasted. But acceptance of the grey moods and pacing myself is probably much more healthy!

> < I was angry all night, didn't sleep (which is typical of my depressions) woke up this morning feeling draggy, but got to work and then--WOW! I haven't had this much energy in months.
> Anyway, anyone else out there experience this? >
>
> Yes. I do.
> I even came to *use* this mechanism when I was very down but knew that I had to appear at work the next day. I didn`t sleep on purpose - to provoke a boost in energy. And you are right, the crash is inevitable and I usually feel even worse afterwards. I am not quite sure why, but not sleeping seems to have a paradox effect on me. Instead of making me drowsy and unmotivated it works like a stimulant for me. But only for 8 - 9 hours. And then the crash comes.
> I donīt do that any more because I realised that I harm myself just to be functional at work for a few hours. And that`s not worth it. I think your anger has been a trigger as well. Anger makes our body ready for a *fight* - we mobilize all our *spare energy*. I am not surprised that the combination of both, staying awake almost the whole night plus this anger made you *overactive*.
>
>
> Micha

 

Re: Anger as on/off switch to mania ŧ crinn

Posted by mgrueni on December 19, 2001, at 13:22:19

In reply to Re: Anger as on/off switch to mania, posted by crinn on December 19, 2001, at 7:37:02

< Thanks so much, Micha. And you're right. Now it is day 2, the anger has abated, and with it the energy. I hate to admit it, but it was exhilarating while it lasted >

Why do you hate to admit it? I understand that you enjoyed feeling so *alive* for a change.
I just wanted you to know that you are not alone with this sort of experience and there`s nothing wrong with you. No need to worry, as long as you know that it`s more harmful than good for you and you donīt use it deliberately (like I did).

Go and get some sleep now :o)

Best wishes,

Micha


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