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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 23 of 23. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by S. Howard on November 9, 2000, at 12:47:28
I can't tell you how much I have enjoyed this thread and it would not be the same without you. In fact, although our problems are serious, it has given me the idea that there is hope for us because we can be so FUNNY. It has also been a comfort to me that there are others like me and despite our lumpish tendencies and our dark days, we have a quick wit and a sterling sense of humor. I have never been offended by anything said on this board, including the use of the term "ladies". I've certainly been called much worse, damn skippy. Please reconsider exiting Lumptonia as I, for one, feel it would be a loss for us all.
-SGH, aka Gracie
Posted by coral on November 9, 2000, at 19:18:40
In reply to Greg - Don't Go!, posted by S. Howard on November 9, 2000, at 12:47:28
Dear Gracie,
Thank you for your post. You've expressed my feelings most eloquently!!!!
Coral
Posted by noa on November 9, 2000, at 19:24:01
In reply to Re: Greg - Don't Go!, posted by coral on November 9, 2000, at 19:18:40
Please, Greg.
Posted by Racer on November 9, 2000, at 20:40:15
In reply to Re: Greg - Don't Go!, posted by noa on November 9, 2000, at 19:24:01
I fourth the motion!
I, as you know, am female. I have enjoyed your posts -- on all subjects -- and have been warmed by your thoughtfulness in many ways.
You'll never please everyone in this world, or any other, but you certainly please many of us here. Please stay!
By the way, if you do leave here, you'll only force me to start a Lumptonian Only bbs, with passwords and all that, and that's really a lot of trouble to do when I'm rolled up in my cocoon on the sofa...
Posted by ksvt on November 9, 2000, at 22:43:28
In reply to Re: Greg - Don't Go!, posted by Racer on November 9, 2000, at 20:40:15
>Greg - you've got this all wrong. You should be flattered that people pay enough attention to be offended by something you posted.
I fourth the motion!
>
> I, as you know, am female. I have enjoyed your posts -- on all subjects -- and have been warmed by your thoughtfulness in many ways.
>
> You'll never please everyone in this world, or any other, but you certainly please many of us here. Please stay!
>
> By the way, if you do leave here, you'll only force me to start a Lumptonian Only bbs, with passwords and all that, and that's really a lot of trouble to do when I'm rolled up in my cocoon on the sofa...
Posted by Cam W. on November 10, 2000, at 7:23:31
In reply to Re: Greg - Don't Go!, posted by ksvt on November 9, 2000, at 22:43:28
Uh,.... sorry wrong thread.
[Sometimes my cheerleader (please, don't read as "feminine" or "feminist"") side gets the best of me]
;^P
- Cam
Posted by chdurie2 on November 10, 2000, at 11:06:34
In reply to Re: Go Greg Go, posted by Cam W. on November 10, 2000, at 7:23:31
> Uh,.... sorry wrong thread.
>
> [Sometimes my cheerleader (please, don't read as "feminine" or "feminist"") side gets the best of me]
>
> ;^P
>
> - Cam
Greg-(If you're still there) what's going on? am i right from comments above that you've been so insulted that you want to run away from the whole board? I looked for the offending thread, but i couldn't find it.If the above is the case, i'm really surprised at you. After you laced into me so vociferously at my response to one of Rzip's initial postings??? You run away when the fire gets too hot? Or am i wrong here? please enlighten.
if the above is true, it's okay greg. you can come out from under the bed now. the monsters won't bite you. and you don't need to be afraid of things that go bump in the night.
Or, and this will probably piss you off, is leaving a way to get everyone on your side? I hope you don't feel like you have to pull that kind of manipulation. but if you do...
see, you have everyone's support. so it's safe to come back now.
caroline
Posted by Cam W. on November 10, 2000, at 11:45:08
In reply to Re: I've missed something..., posted by chdurie2 on November 10, 2000, at 11:06:34
Caroline - Scroll way up to the very long thread entititled "Our Significant Others > >coral" by CarolAnn on 10/31/00.
Then scroll way down (on this thread) to:
"Subjects NEVER to be broached > >BDay" by Greg on 11/8/00 and read.
Then scroll down 2 posts to:
"Re: Subjects NEVER to be broached" by alicefranklin on 11/8/00 and read.
Then scroll down 4 posts to:
"To Greg" by Hannah on 11/8/00
This took me a good hour to find these. I, like you, had no idea what all this was about. I am not going to say anymore, so as not to polarize this situation anymore than it already is.
Greg - Dude, thank God non-political correctness is not a sin or we'd both be in REAL trouble.
Everyone have a nice day - Cam
(Please, no "Don't tell me what kind of day to have!" posts.)
Posted by Hannah on November 10, 2000, at 12:21:43
In reply to Re: I've missed something... » chdurie2, posted by Cam W. on November 10, 2000, at 11:45:08
I am not going to say anymore, so as not to polarize this situation anymore than it already is.
>
> Greg - Dude, thank God non-political correctness is not a sin or we'd both be in REAL trouble.>
OOPS I think you just did :o). I hope if you continue to scroll you'll notice that Greg said he shouldn't have posted that and apologized.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I wish to apologize for my earlier tasteless and thoughtless post. I hope that most of you realize that it was not an attempt to offend any of the ladies here, but was meant to to be a light-hearted joke. I realize now it was something I should have never done. It is unfortunetly something I cannot take back.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I didn't ask him to leave!!!! Of course I can't speak for alice or Greg's conscience.
I'm not sure what the point of this thread is but I hope Greg will do whatever he wants to do. I respect him for acknowledging a mistake and apologizing. I think leaving is a little drastic but it's his decision.
I think he posts an e-mail address if anyone wants to make sure his comments are reaching him.
Hannah
Posted by Cam W. on November 10, 2000, at 13:34:26
In reply to Re: I'm not going to say anymore » Cam W., posted by Hannah on November 10, 2000, at 12:21:43
Hannah - This will be my final word on the subject, as well.
I respect your right to have your opinion about what Greg said, but personally, I do not believe that Greg said anything that should warrant an apology. This is just my opinion, though. I read Greg's post and it was obvious to me that it was meant in a light-hearted, humorous way. Obviously, you do not agree with me, but that's human nature and free speech. No biggie, at all.
Please don't stop posting, your contributions are valuable. We, on this board, may not agree on everything that is said or intimated, but we all can (and do) agree to disagree on several issues.
Sincerely, Cam.
Posted by noa on November 10, 2000, at 13:59:29
In reply to Re: I've missed something..., posted by chdurie2 on November 10, 2000, at 11:06:34
Caroline, was that really necessary?
Posted by noa on November 10, 2000, at 14:02:48
In reply to Re: I'm not going to say anymore » Hannah, posted by Cam W. on November 10, 2000, at 13:34:26
I feel we should all agree to stop fanning the fire here. It seems like it is really over and the only thing that can come out of keeping this going is that more people will get hurt.
Whaddya say?
Posted by Cam W. on November 10, 2000, at 14:19:35
In reply to Re: I'm not going to say anymore, posted by noa on November 10, 2000, at 14:02:48
Noa - I totally agree, nuff said. - Cam
Posted by Hannah on November 10, 2000, at 15:49:15
In reply to Re: I'm not going to say anymore » Hannah, posted by Cam W. on November 10, 2000, at 13:34:26
> Hannah - This will be my final word on the subject, as well.
>
> I respect your right to have your opinion about what Greg said, but personally, I do not believe that Greg said anything that should warrant an apology. This is just my opinion, though. I read Greg's post and it was obvious to me that it was meant in a light-hearted, humorous way. Obviously, you do not agree with me, but that's human nature and free speech. No biggie, at all.AAAAAAAMEN! but I still think it's really Greg's business whether or not he apologizes!! Greg seems to be the only one who agrees with me that it was offensive. Maybe I should join the crowd and beg him to come back so at least I won't be totally alone on this!!!!
I would appreciate a little support if anyone has any to spare. I feel like I got put through a meat grinder for saying I was offended by something he said. It was true I was.
I think the term political incorrectness really excuses a lot of behavior that is a lot worse than Gregs. It's become politically correct to be politically incorrect. It makes people (including me) more and more afraid to stand up for anything they believe in.
Stereotypical humor is a tricky area at best and in a public arena like this even more so. Everyone probably says things among friends that he wouldn't say among strangers. But there are always "strangers" in the conversation in an open forum whether they post or not.
If Greg had not left after he apologized that would have been the end of it at least for me.
I think emotional/verbal/psychological abuse is a real problem. I didn't accuse Greg of any of that. I said what he said was offensive. I think he prevented abuse by taking me seriously and apologizing. I think humor is often used by abusers and it is better to err on the side of caution when it comes to hurting people. I regret that I didn't make a clearer distinction between the general statements about abuse and the specific complaint I made. There are obviously varying degrees of abuse or offensive behaviour and Greg's was (to me at least) fairly minor.
But I don't think I deserved the attacks on me that followed or the lack of support. Or the insinuations that I was a chronic victim who courted abuse. And nobody seemed to think those things were offensive at all. Everyone wants to stop posting about it but only after taking a shot at me!So I hope greg comes back too!
Posted by Greg on November 10, 2000, at 17:09:46
In reply to OK I'LL STAY!!!!!!!!! » Cam W., posted by Hannah on November 10, 2000, at 15:49:15
OK Gang,
It seems that my absence has done more harm than good. I thought by pulling away I could help to avoid further inflaming this situation. Once again, I appear to be wrong.
I will reiterate this one last time... I meant no harm by my comments. It was an attempt at humor, albeit a poor one apparently. Hannah, I can assure you it was not meant to insult you, stereotype you or make you feel like less of a person. For God sakes, I had never ever heard of you before yesterday. A little background on me. I was raised in a female dominated family and I am thankful for that. I learned from a very young age and on a daily basis about the trials and tribulations a woman goes thru each and every day of my life. I have two daughters of my own and they are intelligent, well-balanced and emotionally independant. I would like to think that I had something to do with that. I could not possibly have more respect for women. Women are amazing people and I am often awed at what you can accomplish (and tolerate) given the odds that have been stacked against you for centuries.
I respect your opinion here, and I certainly understand why you feel the way that you do. This was simply a part of a playful thread that got a little out of hand. I have apologized for what I said even though many have told me that I have nothing to apologize for. I felt it necessary to so and I did. But I won't do it again. I think I've taken more than my fair share of "abuse" over this issue. The Devil has been given his due.
I consider myself to be a loving, caring and thoughtful individual. I cherish my friends and they I think they feel the same way, especially as evidenced here. I am challenged, as are you I assume by a dis-ease and sometimes I don't say the right things. But I learn from my mistakes and try to grow because of them.
I would ask everyone to please respect Hannah's right to her opinion. I will make every attempt to be more sensitive in the future. Let's move on, OK?
Hannah, I will stay if you will. I hope that someday you will see that I am not the bad person that you may think I am now and we will be able to be friends.
Peace?
Greg> > Hannah - This will be my final word on the subject, as well.
> >
> > I respect your right to have your opinion about what Greg said, but personally, I do not believe that Greg said anything that should warrant an apology. This is just my opinion, though. I read Greg's post and it was obvious to me that it was meant in a light-hearted, humorous way. Obviously, you do not agree with me, but that's human nature and free speech. No biggie, at all.
>
> AAAAAAAMEN! but I still think it's really Greg's business whether or not he apologizes!! Greg seems to be the only one who agrees with me that it was offensive. Maybe I should join the crowd and beg him to come back so at least I won't be totally alone on this!!!!
>
> I would appreciate a little support if anyone has any to spare. I feel like I got put through a meat grinder for saying I was offended by something he said. It was true I was.
>
> I think the term political incorrectness really excuses a lot of behavior that is a lot worse than Gregs. It's become politically correct to be politically incorrect. It makes people (including me) more and more afraid to stand up for anything they believe in.
>
> Stereotypical humor is a tricky area at best and in a public arena like this even more so. Everyone probably says things among friends that he wouldn't say among strangers. But there are always "strangers" in the conversation in an open forum whether they post or not.
>
> If Greg had not left after he apologized that would have been the end of it at least for me.
>
> I think emotional/verbal/psychological abuse is a real problem. I didn't accuse Greg of any of that. I said what he said was offensive. I think he prevented abuse by taking me seriously and apologizing. I think humor is often used by abusers and it is better to err on the side of caution when it comes to hurting people. I regret that I didn't make a clearer distinction between the general statements about abuse and the specific complaint I made. There are obviously varying degrees of abuse or offensive behaviour and Greg's was (to me at least) fairly minor.
> But I don't think I deserved the attacks on me that followed or the lack of support. Or the insinuations that I was a chronic victim who courted abuse. And nobody seemed to think those things were offensive at all. Everyone wants to stop posting about it but only after taking a shot at me!
>
> So I hope greg comes back too!
Posted by Hannah on November 10, 2000, at 18:08:12
In reply to Re: OK I'LL STAY!!!!!!!!! - Hannah - All, posted by Greg on November 10, 2000, at 17:09:46
> OK Gang,
>
> It seems that my absence has done more harm than good. I thought by pulling away I could help to avoid further inflaming this situation. Once again, I appear to be wrong.
>
> I will reiterate this one last time... I meant no harm by my comments.I never thought you were intentionally trying to do harm!
It was an attempt at humor, albeit a poor one apparently. Hannah, I can assure you it was not meant to insult you, stereotype you or make you feel like less of a person. For God sakes, I had never ever heard of you before yesterday. A little background on me. I was raised in a female dominated family and I am thankful for that. I learned from a very young age and on a daily basis about the trials and tribulations a woman goes thru each and every day of my life. I have two daughters of my own and they are intelligent, well-balanced and emotionally independant. I would like to think that I had something to do with that. I could not possibly have more respect for women. Women are amazing people and I am often awed at what you can accomplish (and tolerate) given the odds that have been stacked against you for centuries.
>
> I respect your opinion here, and I certainly understand why you feel the way that you do.Thank You!! I respect you and understand yuour positition too.
This was simply a part of a playful thread that got a little out of hand. I have apologized for what I said even though many have told me that I have nothing to apologize for. I felt it necessary to so and I did. But I won't do it again.
And why should you have too? Again I have enormous respect (as I have said before ) for your apology and for your following your own conscience instead of your friends.
I think I've taken more than my fair share of "abuse" over this issue. The Devil has been given his due.
Greg if you feel abused my me I am definitely sorry and it was not my intention. I felt so outnumbered and reviled I may not have been careful enough (although I tried) to separate principle from individual when I was replying to your friends' posts to me. I frankly feel more than sufficiently ill treated myself and hope it stops soon.
>
> I consider myself to be a loving, caring and thoughtful individual. I cherish my friends and they I think they feel the same way, especially as evidenced here. I am challenged, as are you I assume by a dis-ease and sometimes I don't say the right things. But I learn from my mistakes and try to grow because of them.Your friends definitely rallied to your support! And they do speak well of you! I have no reason to doubt them! Greg I hope you will read the article I posted a link to on my first post below
http://www.pilot.infi.net/~susanf/emotabus.htm
because I think you will understand my convictions on this topic. I'm not accusing you of it (just the opposite). I don't want the issue of emotional abuse and blaming the victim to get lost because of my personal misadventures here. I gather you are something of a leader here and maybe you can use that information at some future date. I think it's very moving. Thanks for taking me seriously even if I overreacted. It's hard to know when to take a stand.
Peace
Hannah
Posted by chdurie2 on November 10, 2000, at 21:17:18
In reply to Re: I'm not going to say anymore, posted by noa on November 10, 2000, at 14:02:48
> I feel we should all agree to stop fanning the fire here. It seems like it is really over and the only thing that can come out of keeping this going is that more people will get hurt.
>
> Whaddya say?Noa-So, Noa, cut it out! you're the one who's hurting people (me) while urging everyone else to be nice - and everyone is being nice without your remarks.
i put a post here that obviously didn't get posted to you - it was after your first snotty response to me of: Is this necessary?
yes, it was necessary. i consider myself a friend of greg's, and i was looking for information, not melodrama. I don't even know the other person involved, and i haven't read the postings.
this is shorter - and more abrupt than my prior post to you on the subject - partly cuz i'm very tired, and partly cuz i thought that your last comment urging everyone not to fan the flames was totally unnecessary
So the point of my post to you is that I found your post to me rude, hurtful, offensive, and yes, unnecessary. And my feelings were and still are hurt.
your comments are at best ironic, and at worst, a pathetic, insensitive joke. now i'm lashing out cuz i'm angry, so i better stop. i've said what i have to say to you.
caroline
Posted by noa on November 11, 2000, at 10:50:40
In reply to Re: So Noa, cut it out! » noa, posted by chdurie2 on November 10, 2000, at 21:17:18
Caroline, yes, I am sorry. I posted the message about us all moving on after I posted the "was that necessary" post, and I intended the 2nd message (to move on) to include me and that 1st post to you. (is this making sense?)
It was snippy of me, and probably came across even snippier than intended in this medium. Sorry.
By way of explanation: I was reacting to the fact that it had started to die down already, and your post seemed to be stirring it up again, and I was reacting to your coming into it after the fact, I guess, too.
My comment was not criticism of you as a person. Just your post. I like you.
I should have kept my mouth shut. Sorry.
Posted by chdurie2 on November 11, 2000, at 11:07:59
In reply to Re: Olive Branch extended » chdurie2, posted by noa on November 11, 2000, at 10:50:40
> Caroline, yes, I am sorry. I posted the message about us all moving on after I posted the "was that necessary" post, and I intended the 2nd message (to move on) to include me and that 1st post to you. (is this making sense?)
>
> It was snippy of me, and probably came across even snippier than intended in this medium. Sorry.
>
> By way of explanation: I was reacting to the fact that it had started to die down already, and your post seemed to be stirring it up again, and I was reacting to your coming into it after the fact, I guess, too.
>
>
> My comment was not criticism of you as a person. Just your post. I like you.
>
> I should have kept my mouth shut. Sorry.
Posted by shar on November 11, 2000, at 19:26:41
In reply to Re: I'm not going to say anymore » Hannah, posted by Cam W. on November 10, 2000, at 13:34:26
> Hannah - This will be my final word on the subject, as well.
>
> I respect your right to have your opinion about what Greg said, but personally, I do not believe that Greg said anything that should warrant an apology. This is just my opinion, though. I read Greg's post and it was obvious to me that it was meant in a light-hearted, humorous way. Obviously, you do not agree with me, but that's human nature and free speech. No biggie, at all.
>
> Please don't stop posting, your contributions are valuable. We, on this board, may not agree on everything that is said or intimated, but we all can (and do) agree to disagree on several issues.
>
> Sincerely, Cam.
Posted by dj on November 11, 2000, at 19:41:09
In reply to Re: I'm not going to say anymore--DITTO (np) » Cam W., posted by shar on November 11, 2000, at 19:26:41
re-activity and counter re-action...and re-action to the re-actions, re-actively rattling on and on until it does, no more... Ahhhhhhhhh......
Posted by Hannah on November 12, 2000, at 12:14:17
In reply to And so ends another session of hyper..., posted by dj on November 11, 2000, at 19:41:09
OOPS wait a minute - I just reacted to your reaction to -well you get the idea :o)
> re-activity and counter re-action...and re-action to the re-actions, re-actively rattling on and on until it does, no more... Ahhhhhhhhh......
Posted by dj on November 12, 2000, at 12:49:25
In reply to Re: And so dj gets the last word............... » dj, posted by Hannah on November 12, 2000, at 12:14:17
> OOPS wait a minute - I just reacted to your reaction to -well you get the idea :o)
>
>
> > re-activity and counter re-action...and re-action to the re-actions, re-actively rattling on >and on until it does, no more... Ahhhhhhhhh......Exactly! ;)
This is the end of the thread.
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