Posted by Greg on November 10, 2000, at 17:09:46
In reply to OK I'LL STAY!!!!!!!!! » Cam W., posted by Hannah on November 10, 2000, at 15:49:15
OK Gang,
It seems that my absence has done more harm than good. I thought by pulling away I could help to avoid further inflaming this situation. Once again, I appear to be wrong.
I will reiterate this one last time... I meant no harm by my comments. It was an attempt at humor, albeit a poor one apparently. Hannah, I can assure you it was not meant to insult you, stereotype you or make you feel like less of a person. For God sakes, I had never ever heard of you before yesterday. A little background on me. I was raised in a female dominated family and I am thankful for that. I learned from a very young age and on a daily basis about the trials and tribulations a woman goes thru each and every day of my life. I have two daughters of my own and they are intelligent, well-balanced and emotionally independant. I would like to think that I had something to do with that. I could not possibly have more respect for women. Women are amazing people and I am often awed at what you can accomplish (and tolerate) given the odds that have been stacked against you for centuries.
I respect your opinion here, and I certainly understand why you feel the way that you do. This was simply a part of a playful thread that got a little out of hand. I have apologized for what I said even though many have told me that I have nothing to apologize for. I felt it necessary to so and I did. But I won't do it again. I think I've taken more than my fair share of "abuse" over this issue. The Devil has been given his due.
I consider myself to be a loving, caring and thoughtful individual. I cherish my friends and they I think they feel the same way, especially as evidenced here. I am challenged, as are you I assume by a dis-ease and sometimes I don't say the right things. But I learn from my mistakes and try to grow because of them.
I would ask everyone to please respect Hannah's right to her opinion. I will make every attempt to be more sensitive in the future. Let's move on, OK?
Hannah, I will stay if you will. I hope that someday you will see that I am not the bad person that you may think I am now and we will be able to be friends.
Peace?
Greg> > Hannah - This will be my final word on the subject, as well.
> >
> > I respect your right to have your opinion about what Greg said, but personally, I do not believe that Greg said anything that should warrant an apology. This is just my opinion, though. I read Greg's post and it was obvious to me that it was meant in a light-hearted, humorous way. Obviously, you do not agree with me, but that's human nature and free speech. No biggie, at all.
>
> AAAAAAAMEN! but I still think it's really Greg's business whether or not he apologizes!! Greg seems to be the only one who agrees with me that it was offensive. Maybe I should join the crowd and beg him to come back so at least I won't be totally alone on this!!!!
>
> I would appreciate a little support if anyone has any to spare. I feel like I got put through a meat grinder for saying I was offended by something he said. It was true I was.
>
> I think the term political incorrectness really excuses a lot of behavior that is a lot worse than Gregs. It's become politically correct to be politically incorrect. It makes people (including me) more and more afraid to stand up for anything they believe in.
>
> Stereotypical humor is a tricky area at best and in a public arena like this even more so. Everyone probably says things among friends that he wouldn't say among strangers. But there are always "strangers" in the conversation in an open forum whether they post or not.
>
> If Greg had not left after he apologized that would have been the end of it at least for me.
>
> I think emotional/verbal/psychological abuse is a real problem. I didn't accuse Greg of any of that. I said what he said was offensive. I think he prevented abuse by taking me seriously and apologizing. I think humor is often used by abusers and it is better to err on the side of caution when it comes to hurting people. I regret that I didn't make a clearer distinction between the general statements about abuse and the specific complaint I made. There are obviously varying degrees of abuse or offensive behaviour and Greg's was (to me at least) fairly minor.
> But I don't think I deserved the attacks on me that followed or the lack of support. Or the insinuations that I was a chronic victim who courted abuse. And nobody seemed to think those things were offensive at all. Everyone wants to stop posting about it but only after taking a shot at me!
>
> So I hope greg comes back too!
poster:Greg
thread:2381
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20001031/msgs/2488.html