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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by k9lover on November 4, 2014, at 15:15:46
Haven't been here in years....
My wife disclosed to me last night that my (I thought serious) suicide attempt last year was considered by my doctor as being "attention seeking". Not a "real attempt". It was my only attempt while I lived there for 9 years, though I have felt bad and gone to the ER 2 other times - isn't that what we're supposed to do?
When I got back home with instructions for followup with her and the unit, I came to think that she was blocking my calls. Her secretary told me the only time I did get through over a couple of months, was that she was away for a few weeks. But this secretary didn't connect the dots, until I popped over to get my wife's prescription. She paled and stared at me and what did I find? My doctor with a full waiting room. Why would they lie? Why would they block me? Oh, that's right - I'm a frequent flyer....
So I'm a bit stunned by this. I learned that I was about .02 in blood alcohol away from what would probably have been successful, and now, finally I know exactly what that amount is so the next time will be the last.
I've suffered from depression since 1977 and have been treated off and on. With and without meds. The latter cocktail works so I'm not anticipating another attempt. It's the lack of honesty from this doctor, the psychiatrist on call (who literally laughed when he told me my blood alcohol(.35) (you can't make this much stuff up), the hospital (not a single person asked me how I was doing - seriously), and of course, my wife, who ignored the whole event. All the psych department told me was to go to AA (which is not for everyone). I walked around stunned, alone and useless....
Already on an addictions waiting list, my number came up after the 9 month wait, in February and I was rejected from because I had stopped drinking. Tried to transfer to the mood disorders program, since any drinking I ever did was to avoid emotional pain, but I had to start the wait all over and then discovered after I moved back to another large city, that my doctor didn't ultimately refer me. I didn't know I was making this up...If I'd known, I'd have added some drama (...sarcasm...)
As I type this, it seems unbelievable. How could one person run into so many walls. Even I'd doubt me. But, sometimes reality sucks...
Anyone successfully lost the "frequent" tag?
Posted by baseball55 on November 4, 2014, at 19:30:53
In reply to Hospital has me tagged as a frequent flyer, posted by k9lover on November 4, 2014, at 15:15:46
I'm very sorry for your troubles. I was a patient at tow hospitals - admitted to both from the same ER - four or five times, so was, I guess, a frequent flyer. But I was never made to feel that it was a problem or people weren't willing to continue helping me. My psychiatrist never gave up on me or saw me as "attention seeking."
Sometimes, seeking care and attention is a good thing. You are asking for needed help.
May you find the help you need.
Posted by obsidian on November 4, 2014, at 21:06:59
In reply to Hospital has me tagged as a frequent flyer, posted by k9lover on November 4, 2014, at 15:15:46
Sounds like you feel alone.
I think ignoring me must have been on my treatment plan in the hospital. It seemed like the main focus of the whole thing, the thing they worked hardest on.
I wasn't a frequent flyer though.
Posted by phidippus on November 4, 2014, at 21:17:01
In reply to Hospital has me tagged as a frequent flyer, posted by k9lover on November 4, 2014, at 15:15:46
I was in the hospital for suicidal stuff at least 6 times this past year. I never got tagged as a 'frequent flyer'. Doctors do notice how many times you've been admited in the past, however, which tends to lengthen stays.
Why do you think you've been unsuccesful at killing yourself?
Eric
Posted by alexandra_k on November 8, 2014, at 17:22:47
In reply to Hospital has me tagged as a frequent flyer, posted by k9lover on November 4, 2014, at 15:15:46
Once upon a time... I was tagged as a frequent flyer, yeah. The crisis team people had something on my file to the effect of DO NOT ADMIT. So I'd phone them when I was in crisis and the conversation would go something like:
'are you thinking of killing yourself'
yes
'you can't phone us and threaten suicide, you are being manipulative!'
or no
'then why are you wasting the valuable time of the crisis team?'
I got to do DBT... After that the conversation would go
no matter what I said
'go and practice your skills, dear'.
It was a horrible time of my life, for sure. I needed help because I didn't know how to cope myself... But nobody would give me the help that I needed. I remember being angry and frustrated and so on and so forth... Why wouldn't anybody help me?
I guess from my perspective now I can see that a lot of them didn't know how to help me. And for those who did, a lot of them weren't able to do what they knew, because of resource limitations.
I have come through the other side... But I needed to move to a different country for a while. I suppose I got much (much) closer to the help that I thought I needed during my time over there. I suppose... It did help me.
I've since moved back - but to a different area so my health record hasn't followed me around. I had a (surprisingly) good interaction within one part of the service. Then moved and had a bad one. What seems to be in common with the bad ones is my need exceeding their resource limitations.
Anyway... I think I have come through the other side...
But I guess I'm well aware that I do in fact need a little help sometimes.. And while the world is all like 'we will help you! just ask for help! why oh why didn't they ask for help!' it is words words words words words most often spouted by people who don't at all understand anything of the meaning behind them... The world is full of people crying out for help and people are too busy spouting about how helpful they are / wanting to be to help...
helping you helping you helping you (Helping me)
mmmhmmm.
I hope things feel better for you soon.
Posted by Lamdage22 on October 1, 2015, at 13:27:37
In reply to Re: Hospital has me tagged as a frequent flyer » k9lover, posted by phidippus on November 4, 2014, at 21:17:01
The security at this one hospital told me "dont come back" every single time i was there. Haha.
I was a frequent flyer.
I have successfully gotten over it.
Posted by Lamdage22 on October 1, 2015, at 13:32:15
In reply to Re: Hospital has me tagged as a frequent flyer, posted by Lamdage22 on October 1, 2015, at 13:27:37
look, if i am suicidal and i dont want to kill myself, i will go to the hospital.
Its that simple. I was all alone in a foreign country.
This is the end of the thread.
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