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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 17 of 17. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by LadyBug on December 8, 2008, at 22:01:11
To EVERYONE whose followed my journey:
Things went really, really well!! I want to write about it tomorrow but I will share this, As I was leaving she gave me the 2 things she's had sitting on a shelf that were mine. One was a little girl figurine that was a replica of the little girl inside of me that we've been working with. The other was a special bottle of lotion. I asked her if she would let me put some in her hand so she could rub something into her skin that was mine. I put two little lines of lotion in her palm and I said there was one for each of us for her to rub together. It was meaningful.I asked her for a hug and she said yes of course.
She gave me a huge hug, one I hope to never forget. I started to cry. I told her I loved her, she said I love you too, a lot. I told her I'd love her forever. We have shared I love you's before, though not often as I only said it on special occasions.
She said thank you for a good ending.
She smiled her beautiful smile, I want to keep that look in my mind whenever I think of her.I cried as I got in my car and as I drove out of the parking lot and down the road. I stopped for a few min. then started to cry again. It's an awful pain but I have to deal with it.
I will write more tomorrow. I'm emotionally drained. But I am okay.
THANK YOU to everyone who has followed me and my journey here. I plan to stay here for now. I would be lost without my babble friends. I am grateful to you all!!More tomorrow............
LadyBug
Posted by twinleaf on December 8, 2008, at 22:49:26
In reply to How it went~~~o:), posted by LadyBug on December 8, 2008, at 22:01:11
That is absolutely wonderful!!!!!! You'll have that unforgettable loving experience with you forever, and it validates all the years of hard work you have done with her. Thank you for sharing it with us; if you want to share more details later, I know everyone would love to hear..
There haven't yet been very many accounts of great terminations, so yours means a lot.
Posted by DAisym on December 8, 2008, at 22:51:33
In reply to How it went~~~o:), posted by LadyBug on December 8, 2008, at 22:01:11
I wish I knew how to draw "good" tears with a key board, but I don't. I just want to say thank you for sharing such a special thing. I know it is painful but I know you will carry her with you.
Hugs,
Daisy
Posted by workinprogress on December 8, 2008, at 23:08:44
In reply to How it went~~~o:), posted by LadyBug on December 8, 2008, at 22:01:11
Ladybug-
Oh sweetheart! Tears are streaming down my face just reading what you wrote. So, I can't even imagine what you're feeling right now.
I know you have so much empathy here on this board. AND- I am so impressed with you, you must be so proud of yourself for all of this and for handling it all with such grace.
Sleep well my friend, you deserve it...
wip
Posted by muffled on December 8, 2008, at 23:45:11
In reply to How it went~~~o:), posted by LadyBug on December 8, 2008, at 22:01:11
Ladybug, you are amazing! You and your T obvo did good work together over the years!
Best wishes.
M
Posted by myrtledog on December 9, 2008, at 2:17:05
In reply to Re: How it went~~~o:) » LadyBug, posted by muffled on December 8, 2008, at 23:45:11
Well done Ladybug ((((LB)))) The part about the hand lotion made me smiled and warmed my heart and brought back beautiful memories for me. Thank you. Be gentle with yourself at the moment, take it steady. You've done so well.
Posted by LadyBug on December 9, 2008, at 8:22:33
In reply to How it went~~~o:), posted by LadyBug on December 8, 2008, at 22:01:11
To EVERYONE:
Thank you to all of you that have replied! It means the world to me.
Last night as I was wanting to go to bed early, that didn't happen. My daughter called me on her way home from a late night final and asked me what I was doing. Of course, I was lying in my bed thinking of calling it a night. She offered to bring me something to eat as the only thing I had yesterday was toast for breakfast and cheese and crackers for lunch. I had a case of heart burn on my way home from my session, so I didn't feel like eating at all so I didn't. I tried to go to bed at 10:30. I lay there and thought about everything do to with my T. Finally about midnight I started crying my eyes out. I couldn't stop. I thought I'd be up the whole night crying. I wanted to call and leave her a voice mail and tell her how hard this is. I wanted to write her a letter and tell her how I was feeling. I had a hard time but finally got to sleep about 1:00. My alarm went off at 5:15, and here I am at work today.
I am feeling better than I was but I'm sure I'm going to have my moments of crying and sadness.I will write more later when I have a min. I have so much more I want to share. Some really cool things that happened.
Thanks so much to all of you!! I would never make it if I didn't have somewhere to come and share what I'm going through. I don't want to share this with anyone IRL. My kids are aware but only that I won't be seeing her anymore due to retirement.
Oh, I'm glad I like my job. It will help me get through. I wish it wasn't the holidays, it makes it so hard.
I want to reach out and give you all a big cyber hug.
(((((((BABBLE FRIENDS)))))))
LadyBug
Posted by Nadezda on December 9, 2008, at 10:25:13
In reply to Re: How it went~~~o:), posted by LadyBug on December 9, 2008, at 8:22:33
How wonderful it is to hear this,, LadyBug. It's so incredible to have this good ending that you had hoped for-- which it sounds was everything an ending could be-- very sad, and very loving, and full of the history and meaning, and lastingness of the relationship. And as very very sad it is-- this last time still was able to live up to the whole relationship and to hold and yet transcend all the ups and downs that led to it.
You've come such a long way-- in this--not knowing how it might go, and find your way through it with as much real feeling and honesty as you have. Reading about your last session was such a very moving experience for me.
I'm also glad that you'll be here with us.
((((LadyBug)))))
Nadezda
Posted by rskontos on December 9, 2008, at 11:41:30
In reply to Re: How it went~~~o:) » LadyBug, posted by Nadezda on December 9, 2008, at 10:25:13
Ladybug,
This is such a special moment. I am crying and good tears. I am so proud of you too. You were so upset when she ruptured your relationship. You went out of the way to try and repair that and have a good ending to a long term relationship. I am so happy and proud that it went well.
You made it special for both of you. This is a precious thing for both of you. She will no doubt remember this moment for a long as you do.
This is how good termination should occur. And out of ashes a Phoenix arises. That is what happened. Your relationship was virtually in ashes and yet you managed to pull something beautiful from it and remain friends.
You are amazing.
rsk
Posted by Dinah on December 9, 2008, at 11:43:59
In reply to How it went~~~o:), posted by LadyBug on December 8, 2008, at 22:01:11
That sound so beautiful.
If it ever happens to me, I hope that I can be inspired by you.
Posted by rskontos on December 9, 2008, at 11:46:15
In reply to Re: How it went~~~o:) » Nadezda, posted by rskontos on December 9, 2008, at 11:41:30
Posted by Phillipa on December 9, 2008, at 13:20:59
In reply to Re: How it went~~~o:) » LadyBug, posted by Dinah on December 9, 2008, at 11:43:59
Lady Bug that is wonderful like a happy ending to a book. But didn't you say you might stay in touch. So happy for you. Love Phillipa
Posted by Recently on December 9, 2008, at 13:37:18
In reply to How it went~~~o:), posted by LadyBug on December 8, 2008, at 22:01:11
I'm so happy to hear it went well. It seems like a fitting end to a long, significant journey. Thank you for sharing with us.
Recently
Posted by LadyBug on December 9, 2008, at 14:04:16
In reply to Re: How it went~~~o:), posted by Phillipa on December 9, 2008, at 13:20:59
Ok, I said I'd update with more today. I will attempt to do what I said.
I'll start with this. Hang on, I hope I don't write a novel here, but my heart is full today.Twelve years ago, I had a very dear friend and next door neighbor who knew how much I suffered. We were very close. She was always suggesting therapy to me. (she had been in therapy as well) No way, I thought, I don't ever want to do that! I've seen enough psychological stuff with my mom being bipolar and I wanted nothing to do with any of it!!! I was dead serious all my life feeling this way. Well one day my life totally came crashing down on me. I suddenly realized I was falling apart and soon became severely depressed with a major anxiety episode to go with. My dear friends husband was a psychologist and she talked to him and asked him to find some help for me. He asked me if I wanted to see a male or female. At that point, I didn't care if I talked to a puppy, I needed some help!! He lined me up with my T!!!!!! He knew her through his practice. He contacted her for me to see if she had any openings. This is where my therapy journey began.
Why I tell you this, is because I've since moved away from that neighborhood but kept in contact with my friend and neighbors, though not seeing them often. Well, I saw him yesterday at his work. That never happens, I only seen him maybe a few times a year and it's at his home. How ironic! On my termination day, I run into the person that introduced me to my T! Pretty cool.I asked my T if there was anyway I could contact her in the future like to let her know if my daughter gets married next spring or when my other daughter graduates from high school. She said, yes that would be very appropriate and she would welcome that or if I want to send her a Christmas card each year. She will have her mail at her office for at least 3 more years as she has a lease there. I know I owe her a few bucks so when I make payments, I may include a short update. This makes me feel better.
As I was leaving her office and I looked over at the box she had filled with some of her books she's packing up to take with her, I noticed the one and only book "In Session". I bought that book for her when it first came out. I bought a copy after I discovered it on Barnes and Noble .com. It meant so much to me and helped me understand what I was feeling wasn't so terrible after all. So I purchased a copy for her as well. She loved it! She shared it with the other t's that work in her office and highly recommended it to them. There is was on the top! Did she plan it that way, or did it just end up that way? I said, oh my book, I love it!!! We laughed.
If I think of anything else wonderful to share, I will. I cried my eyes out last night as I tried to get to sleep. I've been busy at work today, so the feelings I have right now are peace and happiness for the wonderful journey we traveled together. We both talked about this last night.
THANK YOU for letting me go through this experience with you. It helps me so much.
For now..............
LadyBug o:)
Posted by raisinb on December 9, 2008, at 14:05:33
In reply to Re: How it went- PART 2, posted by LadyBug on December 9, 2008, at 14:04:16
I am SO glad it ended up this way for you. I admire you so much for going back, confronting the pain, and working through to a good ending. This is a wonderful outcome. Take care and hugs: (((((LB))))
Posted by Wittgensteinz on December 9, 2008, at 16:14:10
In reply to How it went~~~o:), posted by LadyBug on December 8, 2008, at 22:01:11
Beautiful. I'm so happy for you. What a wonderful way to conclude such a special relationship.
I also enjoyed the story of how you came to enter therapy with your T.
It's funny that it was *your* book that was sitting on the stop of the pile :)
I'm glad you will be able to keep in contact with her so that she can continue to share in your life and future.
Take care LB - I know this must be a very difficult time for you.
Witti
Posted by TherapyGirl on December 9, 2008, at 18:32:26
In reply to Re: How it went- PART 2, posted by LadyBug on December 9, 2008, at 14:04:16
Well done, LadyBug. I'm a little too close to this situation right now with my own T to say much more, but WELL DONE.
((((((LadyBug)))))))
This is the end of the thread.
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