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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by tinydancer on April 16, 2004, at 10:55:58
I was reading some articles online about my diagnosis, and one of them had some information about how long typical treatment lasts. They mentioned up to six years. Suddenly I was just imagining terminating. My T is the center of my world-even though I know he doesn't want me to feel that way, I can't help it. If I am so attached to him now, how bad is it going to be in six years from now? I feel terrified suddenly that I'm going to be abandoned on the street corner or something. I know he would stick with me as long as I needed his help-he has said that in so many words, but I guess my fear is, even though it may be six or ten years away, how could I ever walk away from this person who I love and admire so much? Has anyone terminated with their T after years of therapy? What was it like?
Posted by Rigby on April 16, 2004, at 12:01:06
In reply to Suddenly freaking about termination, posted by tinydancer on April 16, 2004, at 10:55:58
Hi TD,
I wouldn't too much. When you're ready to leave you will *feel* ready which is not where you're at now. I feel *sooo* incredibly different about my therapist now then two years ago it's amazing. I never could have imagined how differently (less dependent, less intense, still attached but so different.)
I think it's almost like being a child again--when you're tiny you couldn't imagine leaving the nest but as you grow, at some point you're just ready.
It sounds like you have a great therapist! The topic might be a good one to touch upon too with him. Have you?
> I was reading some articles online about my diagnosis, and one of them had some information about how long typical treatment lasts. They mentioned up to six years. Suddenly I was just imagining terminating. My T is the center of my world-even though I know he doesn't want me to feel that way, I can't help it. If I am so attached to him now, how bad is it going to be in six years from now? I feel terrified suddenly that I'm going to be abandoned on the street corner or something. I know he would stick with me as long as I needed his help-he has said that in so many words, but I guess my fear is, even though it may be six or ten years away, how could I ever walk away from this person who I love and admire so much? Has anyone terminated with their T after years of therapy? What was it like?
Posted by Dinah on April 16, 2004, at 12:22:54
In reply to Suddenly freaking about termination, posted by tinydancer on April 16, 2004, at 10:55:58
I'm never leaving. And my therapist has quit fighting me on that fact. I suppose if he dies or retires or moves, I can't do anything about it, but he jokes about seeing me with a walker and being senile and my probably not noticing the difference.
Posted by rs on April 16, 2004, at 15:54:13
In reply to Suddenly freaking about termination, posted by tinydancer on April 16, 2004, at 10:55:58
Hi. Please do not worry about terminating now. Your T sounds like he will be there as long as you need him. Will share with you if ok. Am DID. Saw the same T for about 6 years once a week. Anyway about 3 -4 yrs ago he moved from here to CO which is miles miles away. It was awful. He had not further contact etc. Hurt in many ways. Especially a few of the small ones due to him also being a child PhD so just imagine how much they liked him. Anyway did not go to another T for a long time. Stared again last summer after getting into a gambling problem from escape and denial. Difficult it was. But today yes still miss old T but realize do not need him anymore. Finally found courage to call him last week. Left a voice mail and he called back within an hour. How the little ones enjoyed hearing his voice. He did not forget me. Was his first DID. Asked if he is working with other clients now with DID and he is. He asked if that hurt hearing that. Said no and happy for them but jealous. Anyway told him how it hurt much about no contact etc. He agreed that he should of done it different. He said could call anytime but will not again. T knows all about this and he was supportive about makeing the call. Anyway you know this new T is so much better in many many ways. So please do not worry about that now. If it really hurts to think that please talk to your T about it. And it is very easy to become dependent on them in many ways. Think about how many different thoughts and feelings that go on. We need our T much but nothing that is inappropriate or passing boundaries. Like him much. like you metioned about being the center of your life. Here its because who else really really talks with all and is getting to know of all of us? Know here live a very lonely life in some ways. Sorry if this is long and hope it supports you in some way. Please write if I can help you with this in anyway. Have read your other posts.
Posted by Speaker on April 16, 2004, at 20:18:34
In reply to Re: Suddenly freaking about termination Long » tinydancer, posted by rs on April 16, 2004, at 15:54:13
I had the same feelings about terminating that you have...fear. Then one day my T said he would no longer be able to see me due to some changes in his practice - I had been seeing him for 7 years. He said we would be able to meet for 2 months...at first I said forget it, if we had to stop it might as well be now. I reconsidered and went for the next sessions and just talking about it and preparing for it helped a ton. It's hard because he is still close but I don't have any contact...it has been six months. I started with a new T (totally different) and he is good but it takes time to get comfortable. I do like him though.
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