![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 11 of 11. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by judy1 on October 20, 2002, at 14:33:47
I have to attend a deposition soon that's related to a car accident I was in last year. I was taken to the hospital and suffered a spine injury, I was told the other driver was fine- but once it was determined the accident was my fault he is suing for 2 million dollars. Apparently he has soft tissue injuries and my insurance doesn't want to pay so they want to go to court and drag me along. Originally the deposition was 100 miles away, but I told my insurance attorney that I was incapable of driving there (panic) and he yelled I had to. I spoke to my personal atty. who convinced them that if I was in an accident on the way there he promised a lawsuit so they rescheduled it closer to home. The point of this rambling is I fell apart when 'my' lawyer from the ins. co. yelled at me, and I'm afraid the same thing will happen at the deposition. I just can't handle anger turned towards me. Any suggestions? I'm going to pay my personal atty. to be there, even though he won't be able to be part of it, emotionally I feel like he won't let anything happen to me. The guy who is suing left this really angry message on my phone machine- I felt like it was a snake attacking me. Am I the only one out there who reacts so strongly? thanks for letting me vent, judy
Posted by waterlily on October 20, 2002, at 16:48:59
In reply to Fear of anger, posted by judy1 on October 20, 2002, at 14:33:47
I react strongly when someone gets angry with me too. I attribute the reaction to the fact that I have little self confidence and base my sense of worth on what I hear from others about myself. When someone gets angry with me I feel worthless. Also, I grew with an alcoholic father who was very strict and got angry frequently and easily. He yelled at me a lot. It is no piece of cake dealing with it, but I am starting to get more confident with therapy.
Good luck to you with your situation. Take care.
Posted by Dinah on October 20, 2002, at 18:24:12
In reply to Fear of anger, posted by judy1 on October 20, 2002, at 14:33:47
No, you're not alone, Judy. Anger terrifies me even when it's not directed at me. When it is, I can't handle it either. I don't understand how some people seem to be immune to the negative energy involved. I wish I had a suggestion for you, but all I can say is to try to disengage as much as possible and let others do as much as it's possible for them to do.
Good luck, and take good care of you.
Dinah
Posted by Gracie2 on October 20, 2002, at 22:00:06
In reply to Re: Fear of anger » judy1, posted by Dinah on October 20, 2002, at 18:24:12
I'm somewhat familiar with depositions after working with doctors that specialize in workman's
compensation cases. In my experience, these depositions are usually low-key, no shouting or finger-pointing involved. Even if someone else does get worked up, as long as you keep your cool the other person will look foolish. If you trust your attorney, just keep your eyes on him and stay dignified. It won't be as bad as you think.
-Gracie
Posted by mashogr8 on October 20, 2002, at 23:18:05
In reply to Re: Fear of anger-Judy, posted by Gracie2 on October 20, 2002, at 22:00:06
Good luck, Judy.
Seems to me if you still have the message on your machine one of those lawyers ought to be able to use it. Just a thought, though.
ma
Posted by judy1 on October 21, 2002, at 12:59:52
In reply to Re: Fear of anger, posted by waterlily on October 20, 2002, at 16:48:59
I'm sure my past has a great deal to do with this also. Thank you for the good wishes- judy
Posted by judy1 on October 21, 2002, at 13:03:13
In reply to Re: Fear of anger » judy1, posted by Dinah on October 20, 2002, at 18:24:12
I agree with your feelings of fear even when the anger isn't directed at me. I read messages on the board all the time that weren't written to me and the anger in them still makes me really anxious. I could easily dissociate from this deposition, but something tells me that might not be the way to go. Thanks for your support Dinah, judy
Posted by judy1 on October 21, 2002, at 13:04:43
In reply to Re: Fear of anger-Judy, posted by Gracie2 on October 20, 2002, at 22:00:06
Thank you Gracie- that really helps. I had no idea what to expect- I think I may watch too many legal shows and I guess I expected to be screamed at. Thanks again, judy
Posted by judy1 on October 21, 2002, at 13:06:05
In reply to Re: Fear of anger-Judy, posted by mashogr8 on October 20, 2002, at 23:18:05
I wish I had been smart enough to save the message, but all I did was freak out and erase it. Thanks for your input- judy
Posted by mashogr8 on October 25, 2002, at 20:06:50
In reply to Re: Fear of anger-Judy » Gracie2, posted by judy1 on October 21, 2002, at 13:04:43
Been thinking about you -- how did it go? Well, I hope.
MA
Posted by judy1 on October 26, 2002, at 11:35:58
In reply to Re: Fear of anger-deposition, posted by mashogr8 on October 25, 2002, at 20:06:50
That's very kind of you to ask- they did agree to have the deposition closer to my home but haven't set a date yet since my real attorney is out of town and I want him there. An interesting aside, the insurance company assigned my case to another attorney, I think the other attorney's tactics of blaiming me for his error in not rescheduling may have backfired. I'm hoping this attorney has a kinder approach. I'll post when something (I hope good) happens. Thanks again, judy
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Psychology | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.