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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 41. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by TheMeanReds on April 3, 2007, at 13:01:05
This past week and a half Ive been stressed out more than in the past 7-8 months.
People forging my name on legal documents. DMV saying I have another licenese in another state. Getting ready to move. People around me fighting.
Basically feeling jittery about all of these things, and most of them not being resolved, I obsesse about having to deal with all this stuff, long term affects.
When I try to deal with these things I feel either people are not listening to me, they cut me off in mid sentence, ignore me, and bite at my heals. So I took twice the dose of my Xanax on these days.
I call my doctor and request a refill. And SLAP, he says I cannot be on Xanax anymore. Thanks doc, take away the only crutch I have right now to deal with the anxiety from all of this crap, that is not my fault.
No Xanax means no Lamictal. Lamictal causes panic in me. No lamictal means I do not have to take seroquel for sleep. Lamictal causes insomnia too.
So I will be on nothing. And of course 'sh*t adds up at the bottom'. Gotta get ready for the ever so fun withdrawls. And 'Ive held back a wealth of sh*t and I think Im gonna choke, Im standing in the shadows with the words stuck in my throat'.
I really think I hate my Doctor.
Posted by Phillipa on April 3, 2007, at 14:41:35
In reply to A Slap In The Face, posted by TheMeanReds on April 3, 2007, at 13:01:05
Oh geez you will be in the same boat as me. Babble anytime and I'll give you my e-mail. How much xanax were you on and what is your diagnosis? I hope the xanax dose is low. Does your pdoc realize that you will quit all your meds now? Love Phillipa. ps I am here for you
Posted by Racer on April 3, 2007, at 14:59:45
In reply to A Slap In The Face, posted by TheMeanReds on April 3, 2007, at 13:01:05
> I call my doctor and request a refill. And SLAP, he says I cannot be on Xanax anymore.
Why on earth did he do that? What's his reasoning? And did he mention the part about seizure risk on abrupt withdrawal from a benzo, especially Xanax?
I'm so sorry. That is really rotten.
Posted by linkadge on April 3, 2007, at 15:34:16
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face » TheMeanReds, posted by Racer on April 3, 2007, at 14:59:45
Sorry to hear that. I have been having problems with my doctor too. Its all about controll.
I don't know whats up with that, just cause you take an extra xanax doesn't mean you are abusing it. Sometimes more stress requires a little more meds, I'm sure you're not using it to get high.
Its all about control.
Linkadge
Posted by Quintal on April 3, 2007, at 15:56:44
In reply to A Slap In The Face, posted by TheMeanReds on April 3, 2007, at 13:01:05
Yeah, it happened to me too but with Klonopin 8mg. He cut me down to 2mg, then at the next review two weeks later he cut off my supply altogether. That's when I started buying them from online pharmacies.
Had the same probs with Lamictal too - it was intolerable unless I took a benzo with it to calm the agitation and insomnia (and murderous rage against pdoc). Well, I know there is a way out of it because here I am nearly a year later, benzo free. Thank God and UK drug regulations for OTC codeine though. (((Opiates)))).
A word of advice, try to go down into the fear as soon as you feel it. Face up to it while it's fresh, or you run the risk of setting up a pattern of avoidance that will be hard to break later on. I know that sounds trite, and the instinct is to run for comfort, but a little bit of self-determination now will pay dividends after the withdrawal is through.
I've been through it many times under different circumstances, so I'm here if you need some advice or support.
BTW is he not giving you a taper at all?!
Q
Posted by bassman on April 3, 2007, at 17:16:06
In reply to A Slap In The Face, posted by TheMeanReds on April 3, 2007, at 13:01:05
That's just plain unprofessional. No, I take that back-I think it is criminal. Find another doc-a family doc would be fine, you know what meds you need at the moment. That's one of the lurking fears that I think causes part of the "medication phobia" that so many of us have-that we'll start taking a med and then the doc will change his/her mind and leave us high and dry. The stigma of mental illness strikes again.
Posted by saturn on April 3, 2007, at 17:47:18
In reply to A Slap In The Face, posted by TheMeanReds on April 3, 2007, at 13:01:05
I agree with bassman. Can you find another doc? There's plenty of them. You can often get in to see a Psych or Family Practice N.P. or P.A. sooner if there's a lengthy wait. Peace...Saturn.
Posted by Phillipa on April 3, 2007, at 20:03:01
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face, posted by bassman on April 3, 2007, at 17:16:06
Bassman amen. Love Phillipa
Posted by med_empowered on April 3, 2007, at 22:36:41
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face » bassman, posted by Phillipa on April 3, 2007, at 20:03:01
what? of all docs, a SHRINK should know that anytime a BZD is used for 4 weeks or more, you at least need to taper. And...if its going to dx'd, you need to have a conversation; they shouldn't just say "umm, no more" and leave you hanging. Lame.
Anyway, I say quit the other meds if you want to, but do get some xanax or something. Call a family doc, do what you gotta do.
Other babblers would know more about this but..can't you report this guy? I mean, SERIOUSLY--docs have known for 30+years that a gradual taper is necessary. This is unprofessional, potentially harmful, and seems like a ploy to maintain control, like linkadge said. This sort of behavior is NOT ok.
Posted by linkadge on April 4, 2007, at 9:51:11
In reply to Ummm...., posted by med_empowered on April 3, 2007, at 22:36:41
If worse comes to worst, just make a trip to the hospital. That is, if the anxety becomes a big problem and you have no xanax and are going through withdrawl.
Linkadge
Posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 14:09:31
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face » TheMeanReds, posted by Phillipa on April 3, 2007, at 14:41:35
Phillipa, yes I've read some of your benzo 'swap switches and quits' threads. I also have noticed that you write about benzos alot.
I was on 2mg Xanax a day, and when I was double stressed I took 4mg a day.
My diagnosis is BPII, GAD, and mild OCD.
I did not tell my doctor of my stopping all meds, because if he has been listening to anything I've said in the past 3 months, it would be a given:
1. Lamictal for BPII.
2. Benzo to counter act the panic caused by Lamictal. And for situational panic/anxiety.
3. Seroquel to counter act the insomnia caused by Lamictal.Did he make any mental notes? Write this down? The guy does calculus in his head. I shouldnt have to explain my med situation to him.
I took my last Xanax just about an hour ago. So I am being able to be at the computer, and type w/o feeling nausiated. I will most likely mail you. Thankx for your support.
Posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 14:17:45
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face » TheMeanReds, posted by Racer on April 3, 2007, at 14:59:45
I'm not sure what his reasoning is. Maybe that I have become addicted. I've only been using it for a month, in replacement of klonopin that caused depression.
He actually said to me after I explained all of the unusual stress triggers that had been happening, 'What, were you raped?', in a highly sarcastic tone, as if I need to be raped or half beaten to death to take more Xanax. What a jerk.
I tried to taper off klonopin w/o another benzo and it was a hellish experience. So I know I'm in for hell with dropping Xanax.
Posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 14:27:04
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face, posted by linkadge on April 3, 2007, at 15:34:16
Yes it sure could be about control. His tone over the phone was uncalled for.
I've been seeing him for 5 years. I was one of his first patients. I Maybe the only one that has been seeing him this long.
He puts little insults into my sessions like: 'You look like you are my age', which means I look around 10 years older than my real age.
Another, I was happy my face was clear of acne scares, and I said 'look its cleared up!', very happy and more self confident about the situation. He said in return 'your face looks chubby'.
Is he trying to make me obsesse about my physical appearance? What the hell?
Posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 14:39:10
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face, posted by Quintal on April 3, 2007, at 15:56:44
He never gave any other options on the phone, other than to come and see him the next day at noon. I couldnt get there because of my DMV situation. And my sisters starter was out. I dont have a car. He knows all of this.
My next appointment is on the 12th. I have no idea exactly what mental state I will be in. I hope Im not trembling like a little scared rabbit who wont leave the house.
I know what you mean about the fear. I will be moving soon and will need to deal with change. Im excited to move to another location, the physical moving its self will also be a challenge.
I wish I had my painting supplies with me. When I go off Lamictal my imagination comes back. I have a painting in my mind, laying out all my feeling towards him. Myabe Ill go into photoshop, it is quite a mental sight.
Posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 14:48:19
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face, posted by bassman on April 3, 2007, at 17:16:06
He is the only doctor I can afford, I only pay him when I can. I used to trust him, now I dont know. I feel stabbed in the back. He gets me free meds all the time. He does have good will. He knows nearly every detail of my life from the past 5 years. My file is 2 inches thick.
I always have thoughts about wanting to move into the desert part of the state. And I always find myself thinking, I'm too dependent on him to move anywhere further. Then my stomache hurts.
Posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 15:04:55
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face » TheMeanReds, posted by saturn on April 3, 2007, at 17:47:18
I need to get a job. I had a horrible manic episode over the summer. I hastily quit my job and lived off my bank cash. Then thought if my BF moved in rent and everything would be cheaper for both of us.
He moved in, and put stuff everywhere. Shot glasses on my wine rack (OCD), A stupid little 'Big Boy' piggy bank on the bedroom dresser. He wouldnt move it. I told him it was knawing at my eyes. I used to work at frisches as a teen. I dont need a damn piggy bank in my bedroom to remind me everyday. AHHHH!!!!
It really all came down to me flipping out over the stupid Big boy piggy bank. I started an arguement it ended with me pushing him out the door, and saying get yourself and your stuff out! He walked away, I ripped the Big Boys head off and threw it out the door.
So I lost everything I had. Job, Apartment, Car, furniture, anything big. Over a damn Big Boy piggy bank. I've now become a minimalist.
I've been looking for another job for months. Nothing ever comes to surface. So I need to keep trucking for a job. The rejection I have gotten in the past gets me down.
Posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 15:17:19
In reply to Ummm...., posted by med_empowered on April 3, 2007, at 22:36:41
Yes I'm really pissed off at him. I dont know If I will report him, he has gotten me through tough times in the past, finacially and mentally. He did my taxes for me. I would feel bad. I feel slapped in the face, but cannot bite the hand that feeds.
He gave me almost 1 years worth of Lamictal at one time. I litterally have fistfulls of Lamictal. Isnt that irresponsible of him? Even more than my 'badly' taking double doses of Xanax? But I suppose he thinks he is above making mistakes.
He told me I should call the police about all the things that are stressing me out. Yeah, like the fuzz is going to help my anxiety.
Now I'm more stressed about his ethics effecting my daily life, than all the other stressful things in my first post in this thread. UGH.
Posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 15:22:48
In reply to Re: Ummm...., posted by linkadge on April 4, 2007, at 9:51:11
Yes I sort of did that when I tried to quit klonopin cold turkey, well I ran out, and couldnt get more, because of sickness of withdrawls.
Always call the pharm well before you run out. I learned that lesson the hard way. I went to the Hospitol, and told the doc my symptoms. He gave me Codiene Cough Syrup. LOL. I felt guilty feeling like a junky, and didnt tell him the real situation.
Posted by Declan on April 4, 2007, at 15:57:35
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face » Quintal, posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 14:39:10
The thing that got me off methadone was that I *detested* the way I was treated and would rather be dead than have to put up with it for the whole of my life.
Meanreds....I would hate my doctor too....but perhaps you can, to some extent, turn a positive into a negative by the way you handle this.
You just need *some* benzos.
Posted by bassman on April 4, 2007, at 16:15:34
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face » TheMeanReds, posted by Declan on April 4, 2007, at 15:57:35
That is such an incredibly mature post...after reading the posts, I just want to strangle the %$#! This is classic manipulation: get the person to think you really care and then pull the rug out from under them. Just about all of us react by becoming fearful little children. And that MF knows that. All the "nice" stuff in the past was just part of The Plan, whether conscious or not on his part.
Posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 16:27:05
In reply to A Slap In The Face, posted by TheMeanReds on April 3, 2007, at 13:01:05
http://picasaweb.google.com/mathwrathbath/MentalCase
Just looks how I feel right now.
Posted by bassman on April 4, 2007, at 16:40:27
In reply to Painting of Feelings, posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 16:27:05
Stop it!! You're just on the wrong side of the pdoc couch! You're reactions to the situation are to be expected and are "normal". Don't internalize your doc's actions so that they make you feel bad about yourself.
Posted by Declan on April 4, 2007, at 16:45:13
In reply to Painting of Feelings, posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 16:27:05
It seems so nice and calm and orderly...colourful certainly, with admittedly the suggestion of a (colourful) prison.
Or an expensive hotel in India.But I've always expected the worst.
Posted by Declan on April 4, 2007, at 16:47:51
In reply to Painting of Feelings, posted by TheMeanReds on April 4, 2007, at 16:27:05
Maybe not that expensive.
Posted by Quintal on April 4, 2007, at 16:57:55
In reply to Re: A Slap In The Face » TheMeanReds, posted by Declan on April 4, 2007, at 15:57:35
>The thing that got me off methadone was that I *detested* the way I was treated and would rather be dead than have to put up with it for the whole of my life.
I'd almost forgotten that when Klonopin was prescribed (many moons ago) one GP in particular would always comment "You can't stay on these drugs for the rest of your life you know". It used to make me feel like a piece of human sh*t, and I used to worry so much that one day they'd just refuse to give me another script it almost undid any benefit Klonopin was having on my anxiety.
It is a relief to know that nobody can abuse me in that way again.
Q
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