Posted by BSBD on April 12, 2008, at 23:16:25
In reply to PTSD and addictions, particularly opiates (long), posted by BSBD on April 1, 2008, at 13:08:20
Thank you for all the replies. Yeah, I've done a lot of research into this because I'm at the point where I feel my life depends on it. I had only been using for six weeks this time when I woke up one morning and realized that I was either going to die that day or I was going to have to reach out for help again.
I'm impressed that so many people have heard of using naltrexone in PTSD treatment. Unfortunately, I haven't found a doctor and therapist willing to go that route. The two that I've managed to talk to about it and have heard of it are both unwilling to do it right now. I'm being told that they are concerned about me being unable to handle what may come up. Right now, I'm not able to handle what's *not* coming up.
I have 21 days sober today and I finish treatment on the 17th. I finally was able to speak to the hospital psychiatrist overseeing my case. He was very eager to start me on meds, named off all the mood stabilizers and I've been on all but two he named. Then, I supplied him with a list of everything I've taken which was a lot more comprehensive than the list he gave me. I'm just not willing to go back on meds right now. I've had absolutely no luck with psych meds in the past. I've been diagnosed with the BPII since I was 22 and I've learned how to manage it pretty well without meds. I've only had three full blown manic episodes. I tend to run between hypomanic, mixed and bottom of the pit. He gave me a referral to a therapist that specializes in trauma work and I can make an appointment with her as soon as my IOP is finished. She does EMDR, btw.
I've been on a roller coaster this time though. I know a lot has to do with outside factors. I'm a nurse and my license is suspended due to all of this. I have to go before the Board on the 23rd to see if it will be reinstated now. I'm flat broke, have bills coming up that I have to pay, and I'm having a hard time even putting gas in the car, along with buying groceries.
Not to mention, I'm depressed as hell right now.
A friend was just diagnosed with a very ugly disease early this week. I'd never used with him, but this city just isn't that big. So, like any good procrastinator, I sat on it for five days, told myself it wasn't possible, told myself it was very possible, and then made an appointment for some blood tests on Monday. So, I'm nervous about that too. Yeah, especially as a nurse, I should have known better and I did know better. Addiction kills and not just by overdose. It's one thing to see the statistics in the news, but something different entirely when a friend that looks very healthy is standing in front of you telling you that they've just gotten some of the worst news possible.
Thanks again for the help and advice. I appreciate it.
poster:BSBD
thread:821013
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20080104/msgs/822995.html