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Re: Facilitation » Cass

Posted by Kath on March 21, 2009, at 15:32:33

In reply to Facilitation, posted by Cass on March 20, 2009, at 20:50:01

> So I AM asking your opinion. What would you do in this situation?

"LOL - you are so UNcodependent it makes me smile beamingly!!!!! WOW!!! (said from someone who went to CoDependentsAnonymous for 4 years).

There was a strict rule there "NO Crosstalk". No comments, interruptions, etc. The person took their turn sharing, then the next person did etc.

In the groups where it's a problem, I think that I would say, before I shared, something like this: "In order to feel safe sharing, I need to know that I will not be interrupted. I also want to let people know that the thing that's most helpful for me is to speak my truth & sometimes as it comes out, it enlightens me & helps me to understand myself better. In order to absorb this, I need to not have comments after I speak unless I ask for them. I know there are folks here with some very good ideas, comments & suggestions. So if I feel that I need input, I will certainly ask for it. I really appreciate everyone's cooperation in this case. We're all different & I'm not suggesting this would work for everyone. At the same time, I do know that it's what works best for me."

The other thing that you could do would be to speak to a facilitator whose style you DO like & discuss the problem with the facilitator who interrupts, etc. That might be a little touchy. I might try the above first. Obviously you could tailor it to your comfort level & what you need.

love, Kath

PS - I work with someone who gives unsolicited advice ALL the time. I've started to say to her, when she's told me about something...... "Would you like any feedback?" The first time I did it, she replied, "Of course I would! I just told you about it, didn't I?" Which made me realize that for HER - to TELL about something is to ASK for advice!!! Yikes.

 

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