Posted by Kath on March 4, 2009, at 16:19:02
1) My son is 'spinning' DubStep (type of music) tonight at the Toronto club where he & his friends go alot of Wednesdays. It's called "Timeless" & for him it's really quite a big deal that he's spinning there.
AND while I was chatting with him he got a message from the organizer at the other club he's DJed at twice. Son was asked to spin Drum & Bass there this Friday AND next Friday!! So this is really quite good news. Great for his self-confidence & a positive focus & lovely that he's 'moving forward' in the thing that he loves most! YAY.
2) I am doing VERY well at sort of unravelling my life from his! There's a shift that's happened & it's been like this since last Friday. It's really amazing. I'm not thinking of him all the time; I'm doing my pottery; I'm living my life without checking first if he needs rides, etc.
Last week I did some visualization stuff about setting him free & giving up attempting to control. I let the image be something that I remembered from decades ago when my Mom & I saw a 'Military Tatoo' event at the Castle in Edingurgh. At the end, they released a whole bunch of doves from up on the ramparts & they soared into the sunset!
The interesting thing is that I envisioned me setting HIM free as the doves & in the end it is ME who I'm setting free also!!!!!!!!!!! Oh My God.
There's a part of me that is a little edgy about how I'll do at whatever 'emergency' is bound to happen sooner or later.
But I NOTICED myself slipping into an old pattern this morning & it actually felt uncomfortable!! It was about me giving unasked for advice. I actually later told son that I would have preferred that I hadn't said - - - -. He said, oh that's okay; he didn't mind. And I pointed out that I'm trying to be aware of my actions etc & even though he didn't mind, I'd have preferred if I didn't do that.
It felt good. Both the noticing & the telling it.Kath
:-))
poster:Kath
thread:883774
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20090226/msgs/883774.html