Posted by Deputy 10derHeart on February 6, 2009, at 14:48:26
In reply to Re: **multiple triggers**/Please be sensitive » Deputy 10derHeart, posted by JadeKelly on February 5, 2009, at 23:39:04
> If something needs a trigger is it better left unsaid?
No, not at all. I think that would restrict so much what posters need to talk about here. Dr. Bob doesn't want that.
>Its the poster who uses the trigger correct?
?? There isn't any right or wrong. It's a courtesy. Me - I usually err on the side of caution and if I even imagine, possibly, maybe, that my choice of words, or the whole subject, can upset others just by it's topic - I'll use it.
>What about when I come across someone with suicide in their subject line?
Well, that's a bit of a different, though related issue, I think. Letting admin know or emailing a link to Dr. Bob is good, although clearly a slow method. Not much more you can do unless you feel comfortable and choose to talk to the poster yourself. Very difficult situations for all involved, and I don't have anything close to "perfect" advice.
>Thats happened to me 3 times, and I hit the notify button but Admin doesnt respond.
I am only aware of one time, but that could be my memory. Generally, if the thread goes on and the poster who wrote about suicidal thoughts, plans etc. participates, we don't respond as I guess maybe we figure participation in the thread IS the answer. But that's a good thought - we could try to Babblemail back even when there is an active thread. If the poster doesn't post any more and Dr. Bob gets personally involved, we DO try to post something to the community ASAP - whatever Dr. Bob says is okay to say.
>Would the trigger signal be better?
No. Two different things.
> Now I'm confused. Is the trigger used for your own post to warn it may be offensive?
No, not offensive. Topics that potentially upset others aren't inherently offensive. You can use it when you think to yourself that reading what you are about to post is commonly sensitive (e.g. - suicide, self-injury, child abuse of ANY kind, etc.) to some people, and maybe they'd like a red flag so they get the choice to read or avoid.
>Or do you post it when you come across anothers post that may be offensive or insensitive?
Yes, Babblers so sometimes post a (nm) post, like I've done with yours, when they are concerned about others being triggered. It's meant to be helpful. But not because the post is "offensive or insensitive," in the sense of uncivil, but in the way I've described above. For example, once I read a post on Relationships about domestic abuse, where the poster graphically described what her abuser did to her. This was extremely difficult for me to read as I am a survivor of a relationship that included battering. I posted underneath, "domestic abuse triggers above, " or something like that. I thought if it was that upsetting to me, others might choose to not read it.
> Either way I apoligize for the "saying" and hope I didn't offend anyone. It was thoughtless of me considering where I am and I will try to be more careful.
Thank you.
poster:Deputy 10derHeart
thread:877474
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20090116/msgs/878507.html