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Do you ever feel like beating someone to death?

Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on October 20, 2008, at 23:45:34 [reposted on October 21, 2008, at 2:39:32 | original URL]

Of course. This is not a civil subject. I believe, morally, i live with a family, and in the past. I never understood why i was put down constantly, talked about, my own mother gossips about me now, you know whats funny? people talked about me in high school. Now my own parents gossip about me. Someone say T-R-A-S-H, and their evil chats, blasphomy, i dont wish them bad, i wish that God will put them, and reveal their secret sins they do. This will go on the internet. For all the world, or people on the web. I am ashamed, that i was born with aspeger's. I've came to the point, I am ashamed my mother married my stepfather. I am ashamed the way she treats me and then says: look at you, your angry!
It's a trap, DNA, this happened before in the family. I have had it. I will say to God, thank you for letting me have life, but I don't understand why you placed me with these parents. I'm here? right....there for i cause, and any put downs. From them, represents the true meaning of who they are. I cannot stand my stepfather, The bitter heart, will bear bitter fruit. He will eat his own pride, and die. I'm not his judge, but I pray to father and God himself, this will happen. God see's every evil doer, and they will be punished. I spritually, want to tell Satan, "help me" since no one else does, But ofcourse, we all know, that is the stupidist desion you can make. which people have said "there something wrong with him" F*CK YES THERE YOU IDIOTS!

I'm tired of mistreatment, being "catorgirzed" and play games, "where not doing anything, you are"

People do you see what my parents are doing? EEEE wrong awnser, i cut them off, there not my parents. There just as like the people in school. I just have the luxury of living with them. I want to get out, but you have to understand, i can't take on "mulpli" jobs. I.....start to wear off, and i dont want other personalites doing my work for me. I was the one that was born, they where created, but as coping mechanism.

I'm a very angry person, bottem line. When it comes to the point where some humilates you till you can't take it. They wont know what true pain like after that. I believe in punishment to a person who "intentially" looks down on a person, which that person has a disorder, they can't help.

You know in school, sometimes i wanted to get something and beat the living sh*t until they say "please, no more!, i'm sorry". That's a juvinile look at it. When you become and adult, and the same thing happens, i need help! I won't disclose, but i need to get out of this house as soon as possible. Other wise, there will be horrible thing that will happen. And you have to understand, i know people have given me advice. This site has always been here...if you disagree with me...f u, go your own way. I know alot people suffer, but when "its about to hit the top, that means something bad will happen, you figure it out"

The people that i'm associated with, especially my own parents are not supportive. I already disclosed "Tiffany" has replaced my mother I switch with her, rarely, but usally when i cannot cope with a situation. Such as when no one, will give a helping hand....

what happens, the mind "spits" because of abandoment. Into other characters, from intense trama. After your tears have dried, and can not cry no more, another character is created to continaully cope, and forget the memories and start a new life. It's very sad, but it's true. I have alot of compassion for other who have suffered even worse, sexual abuse, some stories that cannot be spoken about because of the horrendous past.

But to the main subject, people who hurt you in life, especially when its your own family. There got to be a plan to get out. And make it known, who did this to you. My therpist, stares at me like, and tells me the rules of living. He doenst listen to my danm problem.
______________________________
Will someone help me with anger, and let this pass away? when you have this baggage your whole life.....its alot of things.

I hope someone here's this story. I dont want to plant seeds of discord, but i'm angry, and raged, why this happened.

Have a great day;)


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poster:rjlockhart04-08 thread:858535
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20080929/msgs/858535.html