Posted by Nadezda on September 24, 2008, at 9:49:11
In reply to Bullying » HyperFocus, posted by Dinah on September 23, 2008, at 9:29:12
Hi, Hyperfocus.
I wanted to add my emphatic agreement to Dinah's post. She's absolutely right that 30 is by no means too old to reawaken and follow your dreams-- people change careers at a much later date than that-- or find the thing that they really want to do, after years of searching, and perhaps following a more practical job-- So don't let yourself be convinced by your fears that you've lost the chance. You haven't.
I, too, was rejected and make fun of by kids my age when I was eleven. It was a very traumatic experience and I withdrew from relationships and haven't had many friends as a result. It's taken a long time even to be able to contemplate opening up more-- and only with meds, which I rejected trying for a long time (a decision I regret now, even though the drugs I rejected weren't so good as the ones I use)--
Being hypersensitive does make it more difficult for people who respond more easily or deeply to things that happen-- and especially when they haven't had proper support and nurture at home, and when that's amplified by rejection at school. But it also means that if you choose a career that is right for you, you'll have the pleasure and intensity in your work-- and in relationships-- that can offset, if not fully compensate for the losses.
There's no real answer as to how to accept the lost years. I've found, over time, that they just gradually recede into the background, as you progress with your life in the present-- as what you do, and how you live becomes richer and more engaged-- more committed. There are moments when the sense of sadness or lost possibilities is tragic, or enraging-- but those moments are only moments, not the sum of life. They'll become less frequent and less important as you move into the present and future.
I hope you'll continue to let us know how things are going for you, though. Don't give up now, though.
Nadezda
poster:Nadezda
thread:853578
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20080905/msgs/853769.html