Posted by LlurpsieBlossom on December 3, 2006, at 10:38:22
In reply to Re: Where do faulty perceptions end/delusions begi, posted by capricorn on December 3, 2006, at 9:44:54
hi Capricorn,
Here's a simplified version of my long post above.1) Perception is a product of the mind, and it is a complicated mental process.
2) Because perception is so complicated, it is vulnerable to interference from many sources.
3) you may be experiencing a strange feeling about your stuffed animals because there is a bit of distraction going on in your mind.
4) the distraction is interfering with your attention and visual perception (of the stuffed animal example)
5) Doesn't sound like a classic visual hallucination or psychosis to me (ask a professional when in doubt)
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About the social issues of feeling ignored and such when folks don't respond to your posts. I'm sorry you feel that way.I don't ignore babblers on purpose, and I'm terribly sorry if it ever seems that way. You write really interesting questions, and connect us to a lot of different sources of information. I think it's wonderful to have you around. You engage with a lot of this material on a very intellectual level.
Have you worked with educational psychologists or occupational therapists on your visuospatial deficits and planning skills? These people often have a lot of very good, practical advice for making your life easier.
The reason why I asked you about your other cognitive skills is because I find that my cognition greatly suffers when I am depressed.
I'm going to try to list some of MY deficits that I had when I was depressed.
1) inability to hold things in mind (words, phone numbers, directions).
2) slower recall of specific information. Once I forgot my social security number! Trouble finding words. Trouble holding the info in my working memory, even after I DID find it.
3) difficulty maintaining representation in my head, that I could manipulate. One example would be if I were trying to figure out how many books would fit in the bookshelf. I would have to understand the geometry of the bookshelf and figure out how my books would fit in there. Difficult.
4) disruptions in attention. I lost the ability to understand my peripheral vision. I only SAW what was right in front of me. It was very difficult to cross the street. I could not keep in my mind "red truck on the left side, slow. white car on the right side, zooming fast" It was scary.
5) trouble understanding speech. I had a hard time following even simple conversation because I couldn't keep track of what was being said and who was saying it. At some points I had to actually ask to see the cash register, because I couldn't understand the price that the cashier was asking me for.
6) trouble reading. just like speech, I could only focus on one word at a time. complex grammar was impossible.
7) trouble organizing. I had problems picturing the task as a whole and chopping it into manageable chunks. I needed to have a list of very specific things to do, and zero distraction.
etc.
In contrast, I have kind of the opposite symptoms when I'm in some kind of hyper-vigilant anxious state.
1) enhanced sensitivity to the periphery- I am VERY aware of movement in the periphery. I often hallucinate the presence of bugs and other creepy crawlies. I hate the creepy crawlies.
2) attention is too wide- I am distracted by all the conversations around me (on the bus, in the cafe, inthe office) and I know what each conversation is about. But, I cannot keep my mind on my own task.
3) memory is enhanced. Too enhanced. I have no control over what I chose to remember. Things in my immediate environment will trigger an intensely real and emotional flashback of something in my past. vivid colors, sensations, and a feeling that I am IN that scene. Memory for the exact words used.
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Capricorn, I'm so sorry that you have dealt with having a unique cognitive style all your life. I can only imagine how hard it must have been to be the object of your parents' and teachers' frustration.
Often, having a unique learning style or cognitive style has some benefits too. I have noticed that you are very talented at finding unique sources of information and posting it here. You must be a prolific reader.
I bet you have developed a lot of very creative strategies to deal with real-life stuff. Don't take that for granted! Also, you seem to be very aware of your own cognition, which is also really impressive.
I also look forward to the day when kids will be given the academic and medical support necessary to make the most out of what they bring to the game.
You are clearly very intelligent. Do you have any current disorders like depression, etc? You sound pretty down on yourself. :(
Maybe talking to a therapist will help you understand that you are a very special person and that you are not just a bundle of deficits and missed opportunities. Having a little more self-confidence might also improve how you interact with others. It might also help you take chances that will lead to personal growth.best to you,
-ll
poster:LlurpsieBlossom
thread:709594
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20061123/msgs/709894.html