Posted by jammerlich on November 21, 2006, at 23:04:25
I feel overwhelmed with sadness tonight. Nothing feels right and I'm lonely. The sort of lonely a room full of friends couldn't fix.
I'm spending the holiday with my (soon to be ex) husband's family. They don't know anything....that we're getting divorced or that he's gay. What a farce this is going to be. It hadn't felt like such a big deal, until about an hour ago. Now, I have no idea how I'm going to make it through.
I love his grandparents like I do my own and I know this is probably the last time I will ever see them. Even once they know we're getting divorced, he's not going to tell them why. So, they won't know we're trying to stay friends and it wouldn't be appropriate for me to see them. I'll have to say goodbye, somehow, without actually having an opportunity to verbalize it.
It feels like such a traumatic loss. And I feel so very alone with it.
poster:jammerlich
thread:706038
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20061106/msgs/706038.html