Posted by Racer on April 30, 2006, at 17:01:59
In reply to Re: Job, car, apartment,, » Tabitha, posted by Jay on April 29, 2006, at 15:23:41
>> It's the cost of education, and the fact I only work part-time that keeps me stuck at home.
Jay, I don't know how old you are, and I don't know anything about your history, etc, that would help me form a stronger picture of you, BUT from what you've written right here, I'd say that that's a good reason for living at home. And that it's a sign of good judgement, and wise decision making, and all sorts of Good Things, things I'd want to see in a man I was considering dating.
Mind you, if you're 50 years old, living in your parents basement, and studying for a degree in basketweaving, that might be a different story... ;-) Otherwise, just tell the truth: "I live at my parents, because my priority right now is to finish my degree. I could work full time and go to school part time, but that doesn't seem like a good decision for me to make."
I'm not saying that I wouldn't be put off by hearing that someone lived at home, by the way. I'm only saying that I would hear your explanation as making sense, and that it would strongly influence how I reacted to hearing that you lived with your parents. If you showed me other Big Red Flags, of course, I would head for the hills, but living with your parents is not a deal breaker, in and of itself, for me. Nor would it be for any other woman worth getting to know.
(I guess that's a long version of "it's not *that* you live with your parents, it's *why* you live with your parents." If you told me that you lived with your parents because you don't have to pay any bills, you don't have to feed yourself, you don't have to do laundry or clean house, that's a different story. If you told me that you lived with your parents because you lost your job, got depressed, and couldn't live on your own for a while, and were now rebuilding your life, that would also be a reasonable answer, which wouldn't chase me away -- although I admit, I'd watch a little closer for other signs of trouble. So, it won't matter enough to ruin potential with any woman you would actually want to meet.)
Good luck to you. And maybe work on finding friends, rather than dates, either as well as or instead of. Friends make it easier to have successful dates, for a lot of reasons that are pretty intangible.
poster:Racer
thread:637951
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060422/msgs/638480.html