Posted by Larry Hoover on April 3, 2005, at 10:31:52
In reply to Sigh, posted by Dinah on April 2, 2005, at 19:19:14
...if my passion was overwhelming.
I don't always understand what happens to me when I get immersed in a passion. I'm striving towards doing it in real time, and I'm pretty close to it....
It may seem less important to others than it does to me, but the mentally ill are surrounded by stigmas and stereotypes. Few, if any, of those are empathetic or complimentary. No, instead, they are used to exclude, to dismiss, to deride, to condescend, to trivialize, to marginalize, the mentally ill.
Again, it may not seem like much, but "Happy Pills" is a very dismissive stigma, in my mind. The very idea mocks the daily struggle I face, to even manage the most basic of human functions. As if. I reject this stigma. It does not apply to me. To accept it, to tolerate it, internalizes it. Instead, I disown it. I point it out. I shine a light on it. I am not a "happy pill" user. Do not use that phrase around me. Do not use that phrase around any of the mentally ill.
My problem was exacerbated by the fact a health professional propogated this stigma. I've already explained how his April Fool's presentation could have gone ahead, without employing the particular stigmatizing words.
But, and here is where my personal history enters into it, I am extremely triggered by anyone who would: a) try to debate my feelings; or b) turn away from me without validating me, at some level.
My feelings are not the subject of debate, by anyone. Even me. They are a true statement, by definition. I will not "lighten up." I will not be compared to others. I will not be labelled.
I also reject any attitude of others that suggests "Larry's emotions will not be accomodated or acknowledged....they are inconvenient for me". Tough. That's my reaction. Tough.
If I'm not done, I'm not done. If I brought something real to you, give me a bone.
Doc John cut off replies. I can't even imagine why that administrative function is even empowered. Look what sort of message it sends.
I started a new thread, and Doc John Poofed! the whole thing, without acknowledging so much as a single word I expressed to him.
I'm sorry that spilled over here, as it was a "there" thing. But I had no other forum to express myself, due to what he/they chose to do. There was a thread here, on topic, so that's where it went.
I'm seriously upset about the administrative functions over there. It's almost like Soviet communism. Shut down the voices of dissent. Eliminate all evidence of their existence. I'm surprised I wasn't banished to the Gulag. I did what others suggested, and I PM'd Doc John. He did not address a single point I raised with him. All he did was repeat the same message he'd given when he closed off debate the first time. Most people finding something funny does not address the issue of stigmatization. This is not a majority vote situation.
What started as a simple debate or expression about the issue of internalizing or propogating stigmatizing imagery became something else entirely. Hear me. Disagree with me. Decide the ideas have no merit. Whatever. But *hear* me. Give me a sign that you did, and I'm okay. That's all that I ask, but that's not what I got.
Anyway, I had a roast chicken to get on the table, kids to feed.....I couldn't really get through it all yesterday. I wasn't finished, but I think this message wraps it up for me.
Thanks for listening.
Lar
poster:Larry Hoover
thread:478484
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050330/msgs/479251.html