Posted by sunny10 on March 24, 2005, at 11:40:27
In reply to Re: very wise, posted by woolav on March 24, 2005, at 10:59:51
sometimes what we jealous people DON'T hear leads us to speculate that things are WORSE than they actually are.
Maybe he would actually be LESS controlling if he knew you were willing to always be open with him.
Now, likely this won't occur to him WHILE you are in the midst of the discussion, and his feelings will be hurt- but your feelings are already hurt, aren't they? And he will begin to appreciate your honesty and willingness to make the relationship work so that the next discussion will be easier...and he will learn to trust that if you have needs, you will come to him to have those needs met; not go to someone else which is what he thinks now...
Communication can't FORCE a rlationship, but it will sustain and nourish that relationship which is good. All relationships take work. It's up to you HOW much work you're willing to put into it (and him, too. I was willing to put work into mine, but my SO apparently isn't. And it takes two to tango...)
I guess, in a nutshell, what all of my over-explaining boils down to is that no communication=no relationship...
poster:sunny10
thread:474509
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050316/msgs/474956.html