Posted by AdaGrace on February 28, 2005, at 8:06:11
In reply to Re: A brief hello to all » AdaGrace, posted by saw on February 28, 2005, at 7:30:53
For the first time in my life, I feel unconditional caring towards another human being that I have no biological bond with. You. I cannot tell you how much it means to me to hear from you. It's incredibly soothing.
I have to admit. I had no idea what was going on with you, because I was terribly wrapped up in my own turmoil. I know I was distant towards you, as well you know from my e-mails. I was affraid of getting too close, and losing again. However, someone told me recently that this saying is so very true. "It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all." And that friend said to me, "If we never speak or see each other again, you and I both will have cherished memories of our time together and that cannot be taken away. We are better people for having met each other." And no, Sabrina, this was not the man I was deeply involved with that has caused my heart wrenching pain.
I feel this way towards you. Of course, I would be deeply saddened to have never heard from you again, and am so wonderfully glad that I have now. But I know inside that I am a better person for knowing you, and look forward to the time when we can talk more often again.
Things are so foggy for my sometimes, and I know I have cause you pain by not being there and being supportive enough. My own selfish ways have caused others to shy away.
I am sorry for being scared. I am sorry for being distant. And most of all, I am sorry for not hearing what you were saying. I am utterly embarassed and overwhelmingly regretful that I was so wrapped up inside myself that I didn't even know something happened to you after the incident over the holidays. How could I have not know? How could I be so selfish? Others pain is no less important than my own!!! My own self destructive ways are not just hurting myself, they are hurting others. I WILL try harder. I will try to be there for you when you need me. I promise you I will try the best I can to help when you need it. You are a beautiful soul and one that I cherish and hope to never be without.
(((((((Sabrina)))))))
I hope I wasn't too sappy. I hope I wasn't too revealing, and most of all, I hope WE are still okay.
Thinking of you so very much,
AdaGrace
poster:AdaGrace
thread:463577
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050224/msgs/464333.html