Posted by jay on February 20, 2005, at 21:06:16
In reply to Re: Oh miraculous rescue (long, sorry) » jay, posted by Toph on February 20, 2005, at 12:52:12
> Hi jay,
> First things first, I understand your reaction to a few of these responses. You obviously posted in a way that misrepresented your intentions and who you are as a person. While I cannot speak for others, I assume that they spoke of the tone of your post in a way that was intended to be constructive criticism not an assault to your character. We all can have sensitive buttons here. I think that those who know you (as I am becoming) would form a "mob" of support for your good forture as much as they would rally to your aid if you were in trouble. This, even if you had ruffled a few feathers in the past. At least I would hope this would be true, anyway.
>
> As for social work, I kept falling on my face with manic-depressive illness (aborted medical, law school, and teaching careers). It's tough to complete these rigorous programs from the psych ward. I was riding the train with a bunch of stiffs when I wandered into the State of Illinois building and began leafing through the catalogue of jobs. I kept staring at the social work positions. I ended up late for my paralegal job after taking the exams for mental health, corrections, and children & family services positions. The questions were out of some textbook I had never read. I did very well anyway and a few months later the state said there was a position open in child welfare for the two most northern counties in Illinois. When I arrived for my interview everyone was wearing blue jeans and they were so down to earth compared with the suits stuck in their newspapers on the train. My interview went well (I had picked up quite a few survival skills in the state psychiatric facilities) and I was hired. With the help of lithium, of course, my life took a dramatic change. Helping children who were beaten, degraded and raped became a passion. For the first time in my life I did not respond to an inquiry about what do I do with I DO this or that, rather I would say I AM a social worker. I had lied about being a teacher (I was a student teacher so I stretched the truth) which waved the social work degree for employment. So, feeling this was my career path, I went back to school and got my MSW. I was offered a clincal supervisor and clinical therapist position at the University of Chicago Orthogenic School were I worked for two miserable years. My disillusionment with classic psychoalytic treatment combined with my failing marriage tested the prophylactic properties of my medication. I escaped to the job that had once saved my life, child protection, this time in another state. After two more years of knocking on peoples' doors and looking into terrified little eyes, I fried like an egg with the stress. I transfered to adult protective services where for the past 13 years I knock on doors and peer into wrinkled eyes equally terrified from some son or daughter who push them down or take their measly social security check for crack or in most cases are alone desperately trying to hang on to the last thing they care about, their home.
>
> I actually have a decent salary (thanks to AFSME), good health insurance and a decent state pension. I am pretty burned out nonetheless (mostly the paper work, but partially from all of the clients who I strived so hard to support who are now dead). I'm in public service prison, paid too well to replace my job, and unwilling to give up the job security, especially with an administration that would rather kill people that help them. I still am a social worker and have no regrets. I am just weary from all the sleepless nights. Sorry to ramble.
>
> TophHey Toph,
I started a post to you before, but did something dumb by accidentally closing the posting window.
In honesty, I felt really unsupported in my posts...putting me on the defensive. I am *not* perfect, but dang I know I am a very, very good person. Men can be manipulative...well so can women.(The woman I am talking about I dated in the post.) Ya it was the tone, for the most part, things where delivered in, and I didn't appreciate the mob-rules action without asking more questions and finding more about the story.
It seems just to be automatic.."Oh..it's a woman...poor thing...she shouldn't be treated like that." Man, after I cut it off for good, I realized I was jumping to the "yes mam...no mam" of *everything" she was saying. So, when I realized it, yes I should have just cut it right there, but it's only human to want to "rub sand in someone's face"...so I wrote my straight-forward letter and called a spade a spade.One other thing I can't understand...this is fine if people want to believe in it...but the concept of what pop-culture has turned to mean "unconditional love" is just wrong..period. Like you, I've studied most of the major psychoanalytical paradigms, and people really have a gross mis-understanding of what the concept is all about.
I appreciate your job situation, I've had some tough times in the field myself. If you find the right job, I think you can practise positive nurturing and growth, but it took me 15 years to build that 'wall' of growth. So, maybe don't be too sure of driving your kids away from a career in the field. It beats working for some money-grabbing, selfish company who do nothing for the good of humanity.
Keep on keepin'...
Best,
Jay :-)
poster:jay
thread:460229
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050215/msgs/461043.html