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Re: I feel down today

Posted by TexasChic on May 18, 2004, at 8:34:21

In reply to Re: I feel down today, posted by spoc on May 17, 2004, at 21:40:04

Thanks you guys. I actually feel much better today. Yesterday I was having one of those days where I feel like I'm going to have a nervous breakdown. My head even feels clearer. I really haven't been on the Prozac that long yet, so I guess there's bound to be a few ups and downs. It just worked so quickly I thought I was back to normal.

But I've thought things over, and what spoc said on friendships makes alot of sense to me. I guess the hardest part is I work with this friend, so that just adds to the stress. I've decided to just try to keep the hurt feelings to myself for now, because our relationship thus far has been this vicious cycle of: her doing something, me getting upset, then we talk and I cry, then she assures me she's my friend and our friendship is important, then it starts all over.

I know my feelings are definitly connected to the other friendship ending. I guess I'm scared that I'm really the person she accused me off, and I just don't want to be that clingy, needy, pathetic person she described. I don't want people to feel sorry for me, I want them to enjoy my company and want me around.

I know part of my depression (or self esteem issues, whichever the case) causes me to be paranoid, so I can't always trust those feelings. I also think it may be an OCD trait because I obsess over these things endlessly.

So, I'm going to *try* to develope a thicker skin, as well as try to make new friends so I won't feel as if I'll be completely alone if things don't work out.

And as for the boyfriend, I have tried to be nice to him over and over again, to no avail. He's just a jerk.

Thanks again yall!

 

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