Posted by SandyWeb on April 8, 2004, at 15:08:38
In reply to Sandy, posted by jlynne on April 6, 2004, at 12:12:19
Hi all,
I'm sorry if I caused you to worry this past week by not being on the board. Turns out that Dr. Bob called the police again. They came out on the evening of April 1st, but left after a while. But there was a seperate call the next morning, and two more police showed up at 11:30am. And they made me go to the hospital.
So I've been in-patient since the morning of April 2nd. I just got back this afternoon. I am soooo tired. I didn't enjoy being on "suicide watch". And I did a certain amount of freaking out the first couple of days.
I'm FREE now. Yeah!! Finally I'll be able to get some sleep.
The two cops stuck with me the whole time we were at the hospital until I was admitted. They were wonderful guys, and they were quite shocked when they found out that they wouldn't be taking me back home. I just didn't present to them as someone in crisis. Aren't we all just great at hiding our true selves? *smile*
For starters:
Thank you, Dr. Bob, for continuing to seek help for me. It took 5 visits from the police simply because I wasn't willing to show that things were that serious. But I was the "real deal", and I'm grateful for your "interference". Lol. I knew after that one day of walking to the ER and then not being able to enter....that there wasn't much chance I'd make it past my birthday. But I'm still here, thanks to you.....and to those darn pesky nurses who wouldn't even give me much breathing space to go to the washroom! LOL!
And I want to thank all of you for seeing me through this. It was uplifting to come home and to find that you had still been posting to me during the past week. The "professionals" had even told me that an internet board was not the place for me to be going to get the type of support that I needed....but you know what? They obviously don't know Dr. Bob's GREAT community of caring people. I tried to explain that all you wanted was to keep me talking and support me through it, but I guess they just don't get the importance of this type of board. That's a shame.
And finally,
Thank you very much, jlynne, for sticking with me throughout it all!!!! You started this thread for me, and you spent a lot of your time and self in keeping me around. I probably would have left the board too soon without your thoughtfulness. Thanks for being such a great friend to me.
In conclusion (I feel like I'm writing a book! Lol!):
I can't say that I feel "safe" with myself yet, BUT.......I made it past the date I had set for myself. That was HUGE. My vitals were crazy leading up to that day, and I had 3 panic attacks while there. But when April 7th arrived, my vitals drastically changed for the better and I didn't have another panic attack. I made it. I'm still here. Nothing has really changed, BUT....I don't have anymore significant dates. *smile*
Thanks again, Dr. Bob, for calling in the calvery. Totally unexpected and absolutely not appreciated at the time (*big smile*), but....YOU DONE GOOD! Lol!
Now I'm going to curl up in my OWN bed.
Hugs,
Sandy
poster:SandyWeb
thread:327575
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040406/msgs/334163.html