Posted by sienna on November 18, 2003, at 23:47:04
In reply to Whatta year thus far bruthah, posted by zenhussy on November 18, 2003, at 23:16:24
OH all these things are hard. You must be so amazing to withstand such stuff. I bet even yer pdoc woulda had a tough time. you sound like you really made it through a lot zen. i was gone a long time and now im here more. im so proud of you for surviving all that. i think lists can be good sometimes.
sienna
> Whew! Mental checklist of what I've endured this year:
>
> *Pdoc change.
> *Long term relationship ending. Poorly. For the best but tell that to an aching heart (back then)
> *Major mystery illness weird test results bizarro weight loss.
> *Family member in ICU after medication reaction after accident. Had to fly/travel many, many hours to spend few weeks there tending to this person.
> *Immediately upon arriving home take care of three important children in my life due to a family emergency in their family. Death. Had to explain death to my godchild. Um, yeah.
> *Suicidal thoughts 'exploded' into my head this fall out of the blue. Very persistent.
> *Pdoc and therp. talk of inpatient program for me. Thank goodness it was decided against.
> *Told myself I wouldn't consider love again for two years after such nasty heartache and, sadly, violence but am outright smitten now with new wonderful other and am feeling really good about that.
> *Medication changes that make the term cocktail seem silly. We're talkin' "let's tweak this mind until we get something right" time. Might even get me over on the med board doing some reading and even a few questions perhaps.
>
> Okay. Not a ten. Not really even a talker. Just a release of the mind before I forget this. Wrote too much already today in journal tonight and if I see a pen again I'll wilt and weep.
>
> Will wake up tomorrow and hopefully be able to start chipping away at those e-mails and IMs. Nobody has been forgotten about. I've just lost my mind temporarily and am ever so slowly finding bits of it hither and yon.
>
> zh
poster:sienna
thread:281064
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031113/msgs/281085.html