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Re: Roommate acting weird again...

Posted by Penny on August 21, 2003, at 12:29:29

In reply to Re: Roommate acting weird again... Penny, posted by Susan J on August 21, 2003, at 10:40:50

> Was she your friend before you moved in together? If not, were you hoping for more than a roommate relationship, someone to hang out with? Do you want to be friends with her?

We've been friends for nine years, since freshman year of college. We say we're best friends.

> Also, if your mood has improved recently, good for you! That's great! I don't know your background, but if you've recently improved, she might need a little time to adjust. ?

Well, considering how frustrated she was with me being in the hospital lately and her comment to me that 'she doesn't know what to expect when she gets home' as far as my mood is concerned, I would think she would feel better now that I'm feeling better. I'm not weighing on her as much as I apparently was.

> Did you recently move in together? Maybe you have different expectations of how to relate to one another.

We've been living together for a year now, since I moved from Charlotte back to Chapel Hill (went to college here).

> <<Not necessarily. Is she a private person by nature? Maybe you feel more naturally open than she does and you are more used to sharing things than she is. I know that my suitemate at work is much more open than me, and "expects" me to dish all about my personal life to her. Her openess is overwhelming to me, the introvert, and it makes me go hide, shut down. Perhaps your roommate is feeling uncomfortable sharing so much of her personal life with you...I dunno, but if it's merely a personality difference, please don't take it personally....

Actually, she's usually pretty open with me. Which is why it was strange when she minimized the window, as though I would see something she didn't want me to see. Not as though I would have been looking anyway. I just thought it was strange.

> Heck, maybe she was having cyber sex with someone and was embarassed....
> > I just don't get it. I'm probably reading too much into things again, as is my habit. Trying to not worry...
> <<Don't worry. :-) Sounds like you are communicating very well with her, and she might not necessarily be communicating well with you. If you can, give her a bit of space and perhaps things will improve.

I guess I'm just tired of tiptoeing around her, which she says she does around me. So, I asked her last night and again today what was wrong, and she says nothing's wrong, and says she's just tired, but then she's still short with me.

Well, regardless, we're going our separate ways housing-wise come December, when our lease is up. Because this is weighing too much on our friendship.

> Good luck,
> Susan






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