Posted by whiterabbit on May 19, 2003, at 23:26:47
In reply to Re: The mind is a terrible thing......to waste » whiterabbit, posted by Snoozy on May 19, 2003, at 16:14:29
The big problem I had with being a night person is that the rest of the world wants you to be awake when they are. When I was young - about 250 years ago - and single, I tried to work the night shift at the hospital as much as possible, and I was happy doing that. It's hard with a young family, though. Your husband wants you to go to bed when he does and your kids want to see you once in awhile. I would have definately stayed with the evening or night shift if I was on my own, and I tried it for awhile, but I felt like I was missing too much time with my son. Plus - now this was a long time ago but it pains me to this day - for some reason, my own mother seemed determined to sabotage my night job. She would call me several times a day for any made-up reason at all, even though I begged her not to. I would try to explain that for her to call me at 2:00 in the afternoon was like me calling her every night at 2am just to chat (hell why didn't I do it??) but she ignored me. She would call and let the phone ring 100 times if that's what it took to wake me up, and then act surprised and hurt when I bellowed at her. I don't know WHAT was going on in her mind, if it was a control thing or she just hated me or what. After almost a year of this torture (I was young and strong or I never would have made it that long), I had to give up. I couldn't smear on enough makeup to hide my raccoon eyes and I was sick with exhaustion. (Incidentally, I finally stopped talking to my mother for many years. I hated her.)
It's ironic that now I'm on the same schedule as the rest of the world, it's no longer important for me to be in sync. My son is 21 and will soon be leaving home to do his own thing. My husband was busily divorcing me when he had a heart attack, so I'm helping him get back on his feet
so he can go on with his plans. (It's okay now, though - I've finally realized that I'll be a lot better off without him.) And even though Mom and I are making tentative steps to reconcile, she KNOWS I won't take any more of her crap. If she starts up again, she'll lose me forever and she knows that too. And she knows I know, so no more games.It's very possible that once I'm on my own, I will revert to being a nighthawk. Very possible.
-Gracie
poster:whiterabbit
thread:227629
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030517/msgs/227790.html