Posted by jay on March 7, 2003, at 18:55:14
So weird...so f'in weird. I am at a point where I am close to, and most likely, will have a job that will set me up for a great career in my chosen work of social work. I will make a very, very comfortable salary, and have all the 'prestige' my job would bring me. I also happen to enjoy my line of work, and am very damn good at what I do. Yet all's I can do is sit around the house, no matter the millions of times I was told to go for a walk, or whatever. I used to worry so much about money...now it isn't even much of a concern. I've got so much going for me...but depression brings so much humility and being 'grounded'. I now am even thankful I don't care too much about my past, and I think of all that I do have, and will have, that all of these people in my past who have let me down won't have. I am not bitter, but success (on one level) is sometimes a great revenge.I guess one thing I really have a hard time is understanding so many women (and I am sure many of you feel the same way about guys.) I was looking through a book at Chapters that examined just how 'nasty' some women can be. If it's not ignorant men dolling out physical abuse, then the female equivalent would be the psychological abuse. Yeah, I know, it goes both ways. Even in their 30's, so many women want some guy who looks like he just came off a Hollywood movie set. Maybe that's why I am noticing a few of my male friends are dating even older women..some into their late 40's, who are only my age of 33. Plus all of those silly Women's magazines..like some of those are dangerous! They promote anorexia, materialism, etc.
Funny..but one of the last dates I went on (a loonnnning time ago..heh.), was with this gal who was just so completely opposite, so "clicky", thinks that money grows on trees, etc. So I thought, frudge it, and I started a conversation right out of Marx's "Das Capital", and how the Proletariat where still being oppressed by current model of Bourgeoisie, and I cross-sampled various social movements with the Worker's Revolution. I think I recited a few chapters right out of the book. :-) Bahhh..I thought it was hilarious. Oh well, she certainly wasn't worth it anyways!
So, I guess that's partly why I am all fudged up and where I am today. (Socially wise) haaaha. I've also been involved in politics for many years (another topic quite a few women don't seem interested in...but...), and even as depressed as I am, am confident I could operate as Prime Minister of my country. (Seriously..I've been involved in Federal politics in Canada for about 12 years now, and played a part in two Federal Elections.) SOOO What!!!
It still leaves me lonely...sad and lonely. Ughhh. I can see the slogan now.."I could get elected, but I couldn't get a date!"..heh. Maybe I should call up Bill Clinton and ask him for some dating "tips"..lol.
Maybe that's it...that's why I like politics...because I have the tongue for it, and it's a power for me. It's to make up for all of my "physical imperfections". Baaaaaa I am shuttin' up now. Out!
Peace,
Jay
poster:jay
thread:206935
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030301/msgs/206935.html