Posted by IsoM on January 8, 2002, at 13:41:12
In reply to Re: fear of depression » pedr, posted by mist on January 8, 2002, at 13:14:18
pedr, I'm like sid. When I'm depressed I'm bored. When I feel good, I'm never bored.
Trouble is when I'm depressed even trying to do what I know is interesting to me normally, I can't bring up the feeling. I try to read what I love to read (science journals) & nothing makes sense or sticks with me. If I try to garden, I do a bit & feel exhausted. Even my music which lifts my spiritis to the heavens sounds trite to me. Even delicious food tastes flat. Doesn't matter what I attempt - it's all pointless & bleak.
Intellectually, I realise at the time that it's just my emotions speaking, but I still can't fake the enjoyment at all. I'll lay in bed watching the trees sway in the breeze & birds swooping about, & it all does nothing for me. I almost hate myself at those times for being so black & bleak.
poster:IsoM
thread:16440
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020102/msgs/16469.html