Posted by paula on November 3, 2001, at 13:40:33
In reply to Re: Anyone else have shame attacks?, posted by Cecilia on November 3, 2001, at 4:15:28
I think for me that the "usefulness" of shame was that it seemed oddly proactive. If I'm a "bad person"--and can't do anything about it--the least I can do is to be totally cognizant of how terrible I am. At least that's the scenario I've deduced recently.
I'm happy to report that I don't have the same shame-response to life that has characterized the last c. 20 years for me. But now I don't have any mechanism for when I am non-functional. I spent two days in bed this week. (That's "hypersomnia," right?) I know that it's GOOD for me to cut myself some slack and accept that I need recovery time, but there was a time in my life when the shame-response at least kept me engaged in my work. Fear used to be a powerful motivator for me. At the moment I'm adrift between irrational shame and calm centeredness.
At least I'm well rested. :)
> > Great question!
> >
> > Very definitely--most of my anxiety attacks are shame based. I think it is true that shame can be useful, but too much can be extremely debilitating--I think useful shame is like a water droplet and intense shame is like a hurricane with monsoon flooding.
>
> I have horrible shame attacks plus a constant feeling of low level shame about practically everything. It doesn`t feel useful-it`s mostly about stuff I can`t change. But I suppose unconsciously I must feel it`s useful-maybe as a defense to keep me from anything that will expose me to more shame. Like therapy, which I forced myself to do for 7 years and which left me with oceans more shame.
poster:paula
thread:13304
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011025/msgs/13397.html