Posted by Marie1 on October 12, 2001, at 7:26:05
In reply to Re: Judy1 -re: In Session... » Marie1, posted by judy1 on October 11, 2001, at 18:16:48
Judy,
When are you due? Sorry if you've posted this before, but I don't remember. I'm glad you're feeling good. I think it's amazing what changes those pregnancy hormones can bring about. I turned into an absolute sex maniac both times!! My husband used to make up excuses to sleep on the couch! :-) I have really fond memories of those days.
As for my transference with pdoc, I tried several times to tell him the extent of my feelings for him, but the strongest language I used was "I'm addicted to you". Which is also how it really felt. I know I could have told him the truth, hell, I told him many really personal things, but I think I would have felt ridiculous telling him that I was in love with him. Like it was a little girl crush or something. And frankly, yes, he would have heard it before. I think he's a very attractive man by anyone's standards.
All of this is now moot, however, as we agreed to part ways yesterday. The reason for this is I have a long term addiction problem to phentermine I'm not willing to work on yet - I panic at the very thought. He feels that he is "colluding" with me if he continues to see me and I'm not doing anything about it. So he'd say it was my decision to end therapy, but it really wasn't. I felt he was giving me an ultimatum, so...
I feel very, very sad. I'm mourning him and our relationship. But I'm used to dealing with loss, so I'll get over it. I'll never go into therapy again; I'm not sure all this pain is worth it. How do you deal with all your transference issues, I mean besides telling your shrink about it?
Hope all continues to go well for you. And your secret is safe with me. :-)Marie
> Hi Marie
> Big as a house;-) and slightly hypomanic but hush don't tell anyone. Actually I just e-mailed my shrink yesterday and said sometimes I just love him, haven't heard back yet- but I get that way sometimes. I don't want to make light of your emotions because I believe they are very real and normal and think maybe weaning yourself isn't the answer- been there too. What works best (if you can stand a little embarrassment, and honestly they've heard it all before) is actually being honest and asking for help in dealing with your emotions. I'm hoping good strong boundaries are in place; if so then just spending time working through your feelings should help. What happens (supposedly) is as you become stronger emotionally you will tend to rely less on your therp and you'll be surprised how obvious it is to all parties. And please don't be 'the good little patient', that doesn't help YOU and isn't that the whole point here? For me the book was helpful in that I found other shrinks had crossed boundaries with their patients, and with someone that has my sort of background that's a big no-no. The other big thing I noticed is I have major transferance going on with this shrink and basically have forgotten about the old shrink (and that is MAJOR, considering I attempted suicide when he terminated me). Hope this isn't too disjointed and hope some of it helps. Take care, Judy
poster:Marie1
thread:12386
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011006/msgs/12429.html