Posted by Leonardo on October 12, 2000, at 7:43:21
In reply to Re: Hypotheses » Leonardo, posted by Dr. Bob on October 10, 2000, at 11:54:49
> > 1) If you haven't used the internet/newsgroups before there can be a very big barrier to getting started. I read various groups for about a year before actually getting around to posting (I don't have home PC, and was reluctant to post from work, also didn't really understand how private groups are. I now know that some are not very private, you can be traced through IP addresses etc..)
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> So it was not wanting to be traced that kept you from posting? And once you learned more about the issue, you felt reassured?Yes I was concerned about privacy. Eventually I figured it was reasonably 'safe', but I was also a little worried about doing things wrong, looking foolish, or getting some kind of abuse back.
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> Before you started posting, did you feel comfortable enough to make use of any offline alternatives?I had been to see my GP, but hadn't managed to get a referral to a specialist, so turning to the internet was me getting desperate to help myself.
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> Finally, I think it's significant, and probably worth making into another hypothesis, that online groups can be easier to join because it's possible to get comfortable with them by lurking before participating more actively.Yes, but it may not be obvious to a newcomer how to post anonymously, which is a barrier.
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> > 4) You can get a feeling of being part of a community, but I think this is largely illusory. After returning to a group after a few months I realised I had no meaningful connections left from the contacts I knew before, which made me feel very lonely, and also that the previous interactions were a waste of time.
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> Hmm, when you returned, the people you knew before weren't there anymore, or they were still there but the feeling of being connected to them wasn't?The ones I knew were gone, that was the shock, as the community I knew had 'disappeared'.
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> Just because something doesn't last doesn't necessarily mean it's a waste of time...That is true of course, but remember we are depressed people who don't always think that logically! I can get from a minor mishap to thoughts of suicide in about 3 moves! At the time, I was grieving the loss of a friend (who went away) and a relative (who had died). This creates a feeling of 'aloneness'. I returned to the message board I used to frequent looking for an anchor of stability. When it wasn't there (or the people anyway), it reinforced my feeling of loneliness. In particular, I had the feeling that I had deluded myself into thinking I was making 'friends' or meaningful contacts, when in fact they had just evaporated. As you say, it wasn't a waste of time (I learned some useful info and felt supported at the time), but I felt it hadn't help to move me forward in terms of me making any real connections with the rest of the world. (Disconnection is one of my problems....)
Thanks for your comments Bob.
poster:Leonardo
thread:844
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20001011/msgs/1002.html