Posted by rjlockhart98 on June 9, 2005, at 20:53:14 [reposted on June 10, 2005, at 18:38:40 | original URL]
Ok im back, i havent posted in a while becuase a major mental nerve crisis, right now i feel really trapped. Im 18 and still living with my parents, who want me off medication, my mom actually keeps my medication and gives it when she thinks i need it. I dont have a job right now, but i soon am, becuase i am just plain aggressive about getting back up on my feet, and going straingt.
Life blizts right now, my whole family has some sort of history nuerosis, my grandmother had a nervous breakdown she had to put my mom and her other siblings in a foster care home, while she was pregnant with other from another dad. My mom told me this not long ago.
My mom right now has some defineltly some sort of personality disorder, she hides it.
My mom has kept me, i feel im never going to get out of here, i know myself, i will get out of this toxic influence, just right now im low.
All this confusion, my thoughts get derailed someitmes, i feel im not "connected' i dont have a grip with reality, i go crazy, well i am still here. So i havent gone insane yet, thats something good to hear.
I cant take being controlled by my mom giving my medication.
If i go off straight, i dont know hwat, but its survival mode. THat means lots of adrenaline!
Well i dont mean to be crazy in this post,
Well right now i am taking:
Lorazepam 6mg Daily (2mg X 3)
Restoril 30mg nightly
Adderall 40mg - not daily.but still my mom dosnt give it, i so distressed right now.
What should i do?
poster:rjlockhart98
thread:510755
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20050531/msgs/510755.html