Psycho-Babble Relationships | about interpersonal relationships | Framed
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To bad to stay, too good to leave » university

Posted by alexandra_k on January 26, 2005, at 1:22:35

In reply to Re: please be civil, posted by university on January 25, 2005, at 10:44:42

Ok, peace all round???

Now: your issue. Hmm.

I shall tell you about my experience and you be the judge of similarities / differences.

I loved my partner very much. I had a lot of respect for them. They would have given me everything they had and they actually did give up rather a lot to be with me. I was not in love with them though. Didn't want to do any of "that" stuff. I felt really guilty that they had given me everything (emotionally and materially) and yet I didn't have "those" feelings.

So: Two options.

1) You stay. But if you don't feel that way about them I dare say you won't come to feel that way about them. Either (a) you tell them about your true feelings or (b) you do not. If you tell them then what? They will be upset and probably leave. If you do not then more guilt.

2) You leave. Then there is the matter of the big wide world.

I chose 1b. I fell into severe depression. I don't think that would be the case for everyone but that was the case for me.

I wish to god I had the courage to go 2. Or at least tell them the truth. Would have saved both of us from a lot more pain at the end of the day. But I am a coward :-(

I can't advise you.
I think you probably know what you have to do within your self.

Life is hard sometimes.

 

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poster:alexandra_k thread:445080
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20041223/msgs/447897.html