Posted by healing928 on July 7, 2013, at 17:37:39
In reply to Re: It's been a long time! » healing928, posted by Dinah on July 7, 2013, at 12:11:41
I have been focused on my daughter and my medical issues, so therapy was not something I wanted to do again. My daughter sees a "Play t" and she has been so helpful getting in-home care for my daughter. She has also suggested it for me due to my health issues are getting worse. She is an autism t and also has a child with autism, so she knows what the heartache is like. We have connected on several occasions. I try to make it to be about my daughter and not my therapy. limiting disclosure. She knows I have a toxic family and an invalidating mother due to coming up in conversation about validating my daughter and not wanting to ignore her.
It actually started as play therapy however, due to limited speech it is now more support for caring for and intervention. Anyway about two months ago, my dh and I were talking about our current struggles and our daughters speech regressing and I was thinking about all the issues I had in therapy with T2 and how I went back to T1 and then fired him because I missed T2. I explained to her I went into therapy when our daughter was 18 months but therapy brought so much chaos into my life. No one wanted to see that my daughter had autism (including dh). She actually went to a few sessions with me and when I had concerns he made it out to be about me. I explained to her this was so stressful and I was losing her more each day and I was seen as this angry person and I think that is what contributed to me getting a rare form of multiple sclerosis. The peripheral neuropathy is the major issue and falling now. Anyway the therapist reaction was very surprising. How could you not see this little girl is on the spectrum? She explained her obsticles and could see she knew the pain I experienced. She suggested me to write a letter for closure. This was T2 Havent done that yet because I wanted to see T1, but I know that is not going to happen.
Anyway life seems so surreal and the years seem to go fast without any change. When I learned that my daughter and I share a genetic mutation that didnt surpise me. My medical issues are complex. My many hospitalizations as a child for depression was really originated due to fatigue and that is why I am resistant to many medications. When the genetics counselor and doc told me that our daughter had a mutation I was not surprised and when they asked us if we wanted to be tested I told them I knew it would come back to me. After the results came back they were amazed how I knew. My point is them was you know when you are different than everyone else, you know. I guess I wanted to go back to T1 and explain why I have had all this chaos and fired him and how I knew there was something else. I remember telling him that so many times, but it was always bipolar and I was in denial when I believed there was something else
We saw the PT about every two weeks. Last time I was very week and felt so disconnected. She knew I was in pain. I wanted to say I feel so disconnected from life, but didnt. Think I will send her an email before we see her on Friday. See is she can recommend someone
Sorry for the length if you read to this point. :-)
poster:healing928
thread:1046657
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20130309/msgs/1046716.html