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Re: Ts as prostitutes » pegasus

Posted by Dinah on February 9, 2012, at 11:10:16

In reply to Ts as prostitutes, posted by pegasus on February 9, 2012, at 8:58:01

I think it might depend on the therapist, and possibly on the prostitute.

Even my therapist sees the comparison as being valid (making his anger a bit surprising). He says that a colleague used to use the comparison all the time.

Some therapists do offer a simple service, coaching or thought correction or whatever. Just as some prostitutes offer the simple service of sex.

In other therapies, the relationship *is* the therapy. And in those therapies, the therapist offers caring, support, etc. In mine, my therapist supports my calling him my therapist/mommy. And that caring presence in our life lasts just as long as the money holds out. I suspect some prostitutes offer the same thing. Not just sex for whatever period of time a brief encounter takes, but an ear and a shoulder as well as other parts on a longer term basis. Perhaps even some genuine affection on a detached basis. But it's clearly understood on both sides that the simulacrum of love is bought and paid for.

With me, it's definitely shame at my own need that leads to anger with him. If I didn't despise myself for paying for this limited form of "mother-love", I wouldn't despise him for providing it for pay. Along of course with his education and training and skills. (Although I suppose the same could be said for prostitutes.)

For the record, I don't actually despise prostitutes as a group of people. I think of them as individuals as much as anyone else. Though I would despise any that had sex with my husband of course. I like to know where he's been.

 

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poster:Dinah thread:1009801
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20111220/msgs/1009811.html